You'd be surprised how many officers I have known who landed up marrying the sibling of a friend or the friend of a sibling. I honestly do not have enough fingers or toes on my body + Bullet's body to count them all out.
The other big group is dual officers that meet AD. In the UK, I think every single nurse married a flier at some point!
Like kp said unless he is socially inept, it will be a-ok!
Scout also has a very good point about age from a military stand point. Bullet and I married at 23(me) and 24(him). Financially as an O1 it is hard, hard, hard because if he intends to go to UPT, they will move around A LOT in the 1st 3 yrs. Our 1st yr of marriage we lived in 2 different states, and moved over seas before we celebrated our 1 yr anniversary. Hard for the spouse to find a job if you are only going be there a few months, and that makes it even harder on them if one, let alone 2 has college loans to payback.
Don't get me wrong, they make a good salary, but start adding in car pmts, college loans, food, spending, savings, etc. and that paycheck whittles away quickly if only 1 can work because you moved 3 times in the 1st 2 yrs. Finances is the number 1 reason for divorce.
Now, the other thing since this is a DS, the best piece of advice as a military spouse I can give you to give to him, is that she needs to be INDEPENDENT. The marriages that had problems were the ones that wanted to be that Officer's wife (status), but were the 1st to say you want me to leave my family, my career and move to Korea? I want to stay here.
1 of 2 things occur with this kind of marriage:
A. She gives in and moves, but because she is upset over it she enters with a negative image of how bad life will be. Nobody wants to hang with someone who is negative all the time. We all missed our family, many of us sacrificed our careers, and almost all of us were stuck in a place we never dreamed of ever living in...for me as a newlywed it was OH MY GOD NO Alamogordo and Mt. Home, ID. I am a Jersey girl, I was making 4 times Bullets salary and the 1st place we lived in didn't even have a Wal-Mart, 2nd didn't have a McDonald's, 3rd was in England so I had neither option.
However, I decided not to complain...I fell in love with Boise, and because we were only there for 5 months, I learned how to build furniture at the base wood shop. I joined every group at Heyford and took up antiquing...plus got pregnant!
2. If he relents and takes a job to be near her folks, or for her career or because she doesn't want to go to Ft. Polk, his career can take a hit. That makes him miserable and again nobody wants to be around someone who is negative.
Whining about how much it stinks there at work will not make his commander happy, thus his reviews take a hit, and now the negative cycle continues.
The other reason she needs to be INDEPENDENT of him, is because she can never ever help his career, but she can hurt it! Our DS is AFROTC and involved with a girl, IF he and her stay together he will have our full blessing. The reason why is that they have dated while he attends school in MD and she attends college 250 miles away. They have managed to support each other, trust each other and believe in each other while only seeing each other 1X a month. She will be okay if he is deployed for 6-9 months, because they already have that independence issue addressed. She won't be calling him to ask how to fix a flat tire or what time will you be home because we need milk. She did it without him while they were dating, she will be able to do it without him when they are married.
I have a statement that I lived by as an AF wife. I was the mistress, the military was his wife. I accepted the fact that they decided if I saw him on holidays or birthdays, not me, I was willing to get the time they gave me. I was willing to accept their demands and rules. For your DS when he finds someone, make sure that they get that.
