I know they love him, but...!

lumpcrab

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Aug 18, 2016
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God love my parents, but whoo boy. They are making me slightly crazy with their good intentions.

First, my Dad wanted to write several former Presidents and petition them for a nomination for my son. I told him that was very sweet, but it doesn't work that way, they can't help etc. He would not be deterred and wrote a (lovely, but such an elderly!) letter to the former presidents, delineating his life and introducing his grandson to them. They wrote back (or their offices did, rather) very kind letters to him thanking him for writing and letting him know there was nothing they could do.

Just now, I got off the phone with my Mother, who is divorced from my Dad and lives in another state. She tells me that she found out the name of our Senator and called and left a message requesting an interview for her grandson! WHAT?! You did WHAT? lol You can't just DO that, MOM!!

She says they haven't called back and I made her promise not to call again. I told her it could actually work against him and we need to let him follow the procedures that are in place and furthermore, to do it HIMSELF.

They are sweet in their love of their grandson but I had no idea I'd be calling off the dogs! My Mom doesn't even want him to GO, she says she did it because she felt guilty about being so discouraging.. well, she's on the right track, but maybe just being encouraging of him would work as well! ;)

I told her to do NOTHING more until she speaks to me first.. I need to tell my Dad the same!
God love 'em both!
 
Parents I can understand but this is the first I heard of Helicopter Grandparents unless Grandfather was an Admiral. As a great man used to say "Everybody wants to get into the act". When your son applies he will get a scheduled interview with all his MOC's without the input from family. An interview is part of the regular process.
 
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Our parents are funny. As parents they did throw us to the dogs. It was a dog-eat-dog world and we were wearing milkbone underwear. They were mostly hands off, refusing to intervene unless we were bleeding badly. Ride your bike 20 miles from home and wander around downtown as an early teen--go for it. Walk home from school (six miles) because dearest mother forgot to pick me up from practice--suck it up was the response. Fast forward to today: dearest mom won't let her seventeen-year old grandson ride his bike six miles to her house because it is too dangerous. She is never late to pick up her grandchildren from school. Oh, if they are upset because someone looked at them the wrong way, grandma is ready to go give the offenders a piece of her mind. God help the coach who benches any of her grandchildren. Go figure . . .

Many years ago, my husband and I stopped inviting his father, a crusty WWII vet, to our oldest son's hockey games. I was sitting next to grandpa when a mammoth eight-year old had the audacity to knock over his precious grandson. Grandpa yelled out, "You ba*****."
 
Two thoughts.

First, you're absolutely right about your DS doing it himself.

Second, it is SO sweet that his grandparents care so much. Yeah, their efforts are a bit naive/misguided, but their heart is clearly in the right place and that's a very special thing for all of you. Cherish it for what it is (as I suspect you do).
 
Parents I can understand but this is the first I heard of Helicopter Grandparents unless Grandfather was an Admiral. As a great man used to say "Everybody wants to get into the act". When your son applies he will get a scheduled interview with all his MOC's without the input from family. An interview is part of the regular process.

Yep, I know this. What I didn't know was that I needed to make that clear to the other generations! They have now been well informed. ;)

Two thoughts.

First, you're absolutely right about your DS doing it himself.

Second, it is SO sweet that his grandparents care so much. Yeah, their efforts are a bit naive/misguided, but their heart is clearly in the right place and that's a very special thing for all of you. Cherish it for what it is (as I suspect you do).

I really do. I mean, I kind of freaked out about my Mom because I didn't know ahead of time, unlike my Dad, and I knew what he was doing was harmless. I wasn't sure if what she did would reflect badly on my son but hopefully not. In either case, their hearts were indeed in the right place.
For my Mom in particular, she lost her Dad in WW2 as a preschooler. She is quite upset about my son applying to be in the military in any way. I think this was her way of trying to push out of her own fear and direct it toward helping him instead. That was quite a leap. :)
 
I'm sure anyone on the receiving end of their letters and phone calls gets a pretty clear picture of the situation quickly and I doubt it would affect your DS. I'm sure it was still awkward for you.

Reading your post did remind me of the time, many years ago, that I stopped by my grandmother's on my way to work in the winter to check on her. She was probably close to 90 at the time. I had a bit of a cough and was hoarse due to a minor cold. She offered me a shot of brandy in my coffee to help my cough. I said "thanks, Gram, but I am on my way to work and really shouldn't have alcohol before work". She wanted the phone number of my boss and said she would straighten him out. I don't remember how, but somehow I managed to get out of there without the brandy or having to give her the phone number.
 
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