What the heck is wrong with me?

For me, it never was the day he left for school. Heck, his mom redecorated his bedroom within 48 hours of his departure...LOL, not that she didn't miss him, but that was her coping mechanism. We felt like the day he left for school, we had done as much as parents could do for a son, now it was time for him to follow his path. He didn't achieve all the things that earned his appointment because he needed Mom or me to hold his hand.

I am prior service enlisted, but since oldest son left for WP, when i hear the Star Spangled Banner my eyes will well up. It's pride. It's love of country. It's hope that all of our service men and women make it through the day. That thought is what stays on my heart, as a dad.
 
forumjunkie said:
Oh shoot that was an easy one I should have been able to figure it out! That's why I was never good at game shows. Don't apologize , you just get to check the bi-lingual box! As you can guess, 'Im married to one of those, Mil/contractor types, I am used to it, but I have stood back and listened to a few of them when they get deep into conversation, and get a real chuckle thinking about how it must sound to a civilian :)
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It can get really interesting in our household when I'm talking military/contractor/aircraft lingo and by DH is talking IT (information technology) lingo. The only thing we have in common is 1's and 0's.
 
hopeful1998 said:
Is this normal? I can't help but to think Im sad because his happiness gives a permanence to his absence?
All I can think is "why didn't you take the full ride to cal poly slo"?. Ugh - I need words of encouragement!
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Hopeful1998, I just want to share that it's been several days since DS left for Reform - he's a youngster. When he's home he is a handful and at times I found myself counting down the days. Now that he's left the house is quiet, and there's reminders of him everywhere in the house. Now I feel an overwhelming loneliness and miss him terribly. Yes, I have to agree with you that our DS' happiness gives rise to a permanent absence at home. But everytime he comes home or when we visit Naptown, I notice something different about him - he's maturing and becoming that naval or marine officer. Maybe it's my bias, but even when we're out in public his "bearing" is noticed by others. If there is any encouragement or consolation I may offer, is that when your DS comes home, you will be amazed at his transformation. Your heart will swell with pride. Take care
 
Nothing is wrong with any parent who has a child selected to enter the profession of arms via a serve academy education!

If anything, it shows that you raised your child to be a responsible citizen!

Our service academies exist to train the very best of our citizenry to set at the highest levels...whether it be at city, county, state, or federal level.

The best advice that I can give to parents is to let go of your children and allow them to embrace our culture of service. Take pride in raising a son/daughter that values service above self.

The military services are a great place to start your personal and professional life, allow them to do so without restriction. You'll be even more proud of them in the end!

GrilledCheese '94 Beat Army
 
Capt MJ said:
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This. Four years from now, you will be on your feet crying and grinning and cheering with sheer joy and pride.

You are going through a bit of the grieving process, as you watch the little boy you raised recede into the land of memory. You can't have that little boy back, you can't freeze him in time and space, you can't stop his progress out of the nest. You can grab onto the present and be in the moment with him - but also at a respectful and healthy distance - and let your own path unfold as you watch his with interest and love.

If your mom and dad are still with you, this could be a great conversation with them, because I am sure the memory of your nest-leaving, when it became final, is still seared into their brains.

It's the way of humans. Be a bit sad for the departure of that little boy you know so well, and delight in the man he is becoming before your eyes. You will still see glimpses of the boy the rest of his life.

When we visited my mother-in-law, even well into her 80's, when she was still making some meals for herself in a continuing care community, I watched her smile quietly to herself as she watched her DS/my DH devour a Taylor pork roll sandwich on white bread, a massive pickle and some odd fresh fruit jello thing, when we visited her in Philly. She told me later it was his favorite Saturday lunch as a boy, and when he brought mids home with him for the weekend from USNA. I offered to my husband to stock the makings, but he just said, no, it only tastes right at Mom's kitchen table, and laughed. My sister-in-law, married to the younger brother, also a career Navy officer, shared that the same applied, only with an Italian roast beef sub.

He will always be your son. Just not the same, but someone new to know and love as an adult.
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We are just starting the application process and your post made me cry- tears of joy, excitement, loss, fear. What a ride this journey will be.
(first post, btw)
 
Welcome Peppypea,

You should go and introduce yourself, and be sure to get 10 posts ASAP so you can Private Message with folks. They Can be simple Hi's, Yeah's, thanks, whatever
 
Suffered with a bad case of "parental pride leakage" at the end of the Christmas visit. So I feel your pain hopeful1998
 
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