DS Waivering

[hopefulparent]

DS had overnight visit at VMI over the weekend. Rats really painted a bleak picture and only talked about all the "bad stuff", e.g. daily monotonous routine, lack of privileges, lack of freedom, etc. He has been accepted at Citadel, waiting to hear from VMI and USNA.

Wondering who else may have had a son or daughter with similar experience that ended up going to any of the SA (public or private) who could offer advice. I totally realize it has to be his decision, but when a 17-year-old hears how "bad" it is, makes it difficult for them to see the big picture.

Thanks in advance for your comments and advice.

 

[aglages]

Just my personal opinion but I think the purposes of visiting a SA, SMC or civilian college is for a young person to get a realistic view of what attending that school would actually be like. Some people decide after they visit that they like a school more than before the visit and some less. Maybe VMI isn't a good fit for your son and you should consider you and he fortunate that you discovered that before turning down better (for your son) options.
Good Luck!

 

[usna1985]

There are "negatives" to attending a SA and, quite honestly, SAs aren't right for some people. Those who succeed at some level view the positives as outweighing the negatives, but not all people will.

Yeah, your DS is only 17 and it may be harder for him (than you) to see the "big picture." That said, don't assume that his concerns aren't valid or that he'll overcome them in time. The #1 reason most students leave a SA (or VMI/Citadel) is that they realize that lifestyle isn't for them and most of those had at least some significant doubts before they showed up. Thus, if your DS has real concerns, it's best to find out now.

If your DS still wants to serve but wants more of a "real college" environment, NROTC might be a great option.

 

[CroatanMom]

I agree with aglages. My son had very little interest in the Corps of Cadets at Va Tech, though it was one of his AROTC choices. He was asked for an interview for AROTC scholarship there and participated in the Spend the Night with the Corps. He really liked the atmosphere and the program. So much in fact, that he changed Va Tech to his #1 choice for AROTC. Its better to get a feel for what the school may be like now, rather than later! Good luck!

 

[osdad]

As we used to say about the Peace Corps: "It's the toughest job you'll ever love."

Its certainly not for everyone; my daughter is thriving - yet my son would have gone nuts. Yes, there are lots of restrictions...but they adjust. Yes, there are lots of rules...but they adjust. Yes, there are severe limitations...but they adjust. Yes, they're up at 0-dark thirty...but they adjust (and sleep till noon on holiday ). Yes, there are consequences for their actions/decisions...but (well you get the idea.)

All that said, the biggest thing for my Plebe is that they immediately have a cadre of peers who's #1 job is to support each other. When my DD had difficulty clearing a hurdle early on in Plebe Summer, a 6' 5" squadmate gave her the boost she needed. Now she's helping him with Plebe Chemistry; Shipmates, Teammates, friends.