Helicopter parents and you

Academy Parents

I agree with Christcorp post #197. Although my guess is that we USMMA parents may be worse, likely because many almost REFUSE to agree that USMMA students are sworn into the USNR and have to abide by a regimental code and system.
But mostly......I just wanted to remind Christcorp that ARMY and Air Force played a football game last week. Against each other.:thumb:
 
CW2 said:
I agree with Christcorp post #197. Although my guess is that we USMMA parents may be worse, likely because many almost REFUSE to agree that USMMA students are sworn into the USNR and have to abide by a regimental code and system.
But mostly......I just wanted to remind Christcorp that ARMY and Air Force played a football game last week. Against each other.:thumb:
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Army played a football game 2 weekends ago. And may I say, they played a GREAT game of football. Air Force....... they totally SUCKED!!! They were not worthy to be on the same field. Matter of fact, they weren't worthy to play against "Our Lady of the Immaculate Conception" high school. I can handle if our team has a very bad year. I just can't handle when they play against a superior team and they play hard and win or at least keep it close; but other games they forget to even show up. Army totally deserved to win. Just like Navy deserved to win. Air Force might have the talent, but they did not deserve to win either game.

On a side note: GO ARMY...... SINK THE SQUIDS!!!!!
 
Actually you are wrong on this...look up NavyForMoms and you will find helicopter parents of enlisteds for every base, unit and PassInReview /Graduation date imaginable. There is a forum for every military branch. This is not unique to SA. There are many, many posts by parents of these young enlisteds asking the very same kinds of questions and complaining about the officers in charge of their dear Johnny or Sue not doing enough to help said child. Just clarfying...
 
Cultural Differences

I think it is important to recognize that relationships between children and parents significantly vary depending on the family's culture. In some cultures, the Mom is expected to do just about everything for their children, especially their sons. They virtually live for their children. I grew up this way. My brothers both grew up to be very successful men despite this. My Mom is a HUGE part of their lives to this day and does things for them that may be considered ridiculous (cooking, grocery shopping, on occasion cleaning, errands, etc....and yes they are married). However, I will add that my brothers will be expected to care for my parents in their old age...there is a definite trade-off!
 
darkhorse said:
I think it is important to recognize that relationships between children and parents significantly vary depending on the family's culture. In some cultures, the Mom is expected to do just about everything for their children, especially their sons. They virtually live for their children. I grew up this way. My brothers both grew up to be very successful men despite this. My Mom is a HUGE part of their lives to this day and does things for them that may be considered ridiculous (cooking, grocery shopping, on occasion cleaning, errands, etc....and yes they are married). However, I will add that my brothers will be expected to care for my parents in their old age...there is a definite trade-off!
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I can attest, by observing my wife, that the culture you describe must exist in eastern NC, where she is from. When he's home she also play's the role of Mama Bear and drives the Papa Bear away in fear he will eat said offspring. She has quite a roar and very sharp teeth. :biggrin:
 
I say take advantage of helicopter parents and make some money off of them! I was totally surprised that I could NOT find a shirt anywhere near/at Ft. Rucker that said, "Proud Helicopter Mom." What a great Army Aviation t-shirt that would be...it kind of says it all. Sure, it's tongue in cheek...but the gift store managers I suggested it to did not see the humor I saw....guess I'll go design my own someplace in internet land!
 
mom3boys said:
I say take advantage of helicopter parents and make some money off of them! I was totally surprised that I could NOT find a shirt anywhere near/at Ft. Rucker that said, "Proud Helicopter Mom." What a great Army Aviation t-shirt that would be...it kind of says it all. Sure, it's tongue in cheek...but the gift store managers I suggested it to did not see the humor I saw....guess I'll go design my own someplace in internet land!
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^^^^^^^ :shake::shake::yllol: :rofl:
 
As with anything, it's a matter of relativity. Most parents who are classified as "Helicopter" parents for their cadet aren't acting any differently than most "College student Parents". And that's the real difference. Many academy cadet parents see the academy the same as a traditional college. But then, when they're not allowed to have the involvement with their child and school as they did/could with a child in a civilian university, they tend to hold on even tighter. Many just can't accept that according the government, academy, military, and even law, their child is emancipated once they take the oath at the academy. Many realize it once they can't claim their child on their taxes any longer. But many still think that they are responsible for their child and they have the right to be as involved. Many don't even realize that everything that they think they are entitled to as rights, such as medical information about the health of their child, in fact is not a right. Their child actually has to give them PERMISSION.

And while there are definitely some helicopter parents of enlisted military, they aren't nearly as many. Again, it's a perception. When you enlist, most parents accept the fact that you joined the military. When you go to one of the academies, many parents perceive you as "Going off to college".
 
I don't know about anyone else but I feel like having my DS attend a SA is a little "freeing". :rolleyes:

DD attends #3 party school in the nation. Great school, hard school, but a big party school. She pledged a top tier sorority and took off running. I was unsure how she would handle herself in that situation. It took me about a year to feel she had everything under control and wouldn't be stupid. I realize now that I did not have enough faith in her and her decisions. I was just scared and worried for her and totally bugged her with questions and calls. My bad. :thumbdown:

DS is totally different feeling. It is totally out of my control. The navy will shape him into the officer they want. HE decides whether this will be easy or hard. I have no control, hence no worry that I am not doing my job as a mom. It is totally a freeing feeling. His life belongs to himself and the Navy now! :thumb:

P.S. I will still happily spoil him rotten when he comes home! :shake:
 
Worries...

I always felt like my son was safer while he was at the academy.

When home for a break or weekend there are so many friends to see and so much missed time to make up for that they try to squeeze a lot of living into a short time.

Our academies take pretty darn good care of our kids.
 
Parents and the academy

Hi
I have to agree, my DD was comfortable at college and we felt she would handle it just fine with her personality. DS on the other does very well in a controlled environment. We felt that going to the academy would be the golden ticket for him. OH, by the way I know I am new to this forum but I do remember when we visited the air force academy last year there was a football game we were invited to. It was something about a Commander-in-Chief's Trophy. Was I mistaken or when it was all over the air force was holding it up while the army was looking DEFEATED!! :shake::biggrin::yllol:
Regards
John
 
Luigi59 said:
And they're all out at the OWS infestations, crying out that the world owes them something, just because....it's not fair.

It's been about 15 or so years since these "trophies for everyone" or "let's not keep score in soccer lest little Ian or Brittany loses self esteem" movements began, and now these kids are finding out that life is a competition, no one owes them anything, and social and/or economic inequality is a byproduct of effort and education.
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No one who goes thru four years at the academy can sustain that kind of attitude.
 
Talking to my wife about the "helicopter parent" craze, during breakfast yesterday, we seemed to agree that parents are often far more likely to defend a policy or rule that may be controversial, or an unattractive event at a school, than their children.

I'll admit my parents weren't involved with my day-to-day activities. I would call them at times to vent, but never for action on their part.

Obviously I was once a cadet, but at times I interacted with CGA helicopter parents. My wife was on rotation in the CGA clinic while she was in college, so she interacted with parents (surprisingly, I know). Her mother is faculty at a college in New England, and interacts with parents.

I don't know if it's some kind of defense mechanism, that parents feel the need to shamelessly defend policies even their own offspring may see fault in, if only to "defend their honor."

Cadets and midshipmen on the other hand, seem to have very realistic views on the situations and environments they find themselves in.

And I'll admit that graduates start to lose some of that grasp as we get older, and sometimes we don't. The Coast Guard Academy Alumni Association's Bulletin has had some very fun back-and-forth over the past few months between academy staff, OLD salty grads and current officers. That's just an example of some of the commonality that develops...that doesn't exist with parents.
 
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