It's easy to remember, in a logical sense, that not everyone will agree with your child's choice. It's not a uncommon theme for parents to hear "but he's so smart...he doesn't have to join the military!" For better or worse, despite all that the military has accomplished over the past 35 years as an all-volunteer force, the belief persists (mostly among baby boomers) that the military is "something dumb/poor kids do." You will never overcome that on your own, and it's possible that we as a military may never overcome it. For better or for worse (quite likely worse), America is in love with the idea that the pinnacle of success is an Ivy League education and a six-figure paycheck (though my sister and wife, both Ivy League grads, will be the first to tell you the Ivy League is nothing but an old football conference). There is no method of entry into the military which is not viewed, at least by some, as a poor alternative to that dream life.
It's important to remember, too, that not all criticisms of the military or the choice to join are unjust. By and large, the military is a good place to live and work, but it does have its downsides. We have hard lives at times. Our loved ones suffer deprivations for the good of our service. We have crime issues. We have poor leaders. We soak up a huge portion of the American budget, and we don't always use it wisely. We have a benefits plan run amok, a good example (apologies to Bzzzt) being the grad school or "gradso" program. We spend an incredible amount of taxpayer money on people who will never return that investment to the level we hoped. And as well all know too well, a good portion have spent ten years being deployed over and over, with all the death and disability these conflicts have wrought. As proud as they were of their children for choosing USMA, 14 families from my class are missing a son. Several dozen of my classmates are missing limbs, eyes, or suffer from other long-term maladies as a result of their service.
We are not a perfect organization by any stretch, and we should be careful not to let the idealism and prestige of the service academies blind us to honest criticism and careful analysis of the choice to join the military.
In the end, the concerns of others will always be there. We can try very hard to pretend they speak out of ignorance, or a political motivation we don't care for, or any other reason to which we might ascribe their critical stance. They do not owe you an agreement, nor a pat on the back for your child. They owe you the respect of acknowledging your child's right to choose his or her destiny, just as they or their child enjoy that right.
There are many amazing paths in life, and the military makes up a very small portion of them. 5 years after college, I made a lot more money than my wife. I had more responsibility, more experience, and had already spent two years deployed. Eight years after college, things are very different for us. I'm still deploying, but her daily experiences make the military look like a game of backyard football most of the time. And she makes more than I do. WAY more than I do.
I say that to point out that while the military provides us a lot at a young age, there are a great many careers that do the same in a similar timespan, and which do so in a field that truly does make the world a better place. After four deployments, I cannot definitively tell you the world is a better place. It's different, but I can't say that it's necessarily better overall. Despite what the Navy commercials want you to think, a military is often a poor tool for improving the human condition.
Whatever your kids choose, be proud of them. The military isn't for everyone and everyone won't throw your child a ticker-tape parade. But if they join for the right reasons, or at least SOME of the right reasons, they won't mind.
