I think you're both on point. Your essay needs to tell someone like me why you? Why should you received the nomination over anyone else? You, and the other applicants, are typically high achievers, have a great resume, and are "pictures" of future success that I want to see!
That being said...why you?
And of course that begs the question: why do you want to go to "the" academy? MOST officers come from ROTC where life is a bit more relaxed, you're with a bunch of your friends from high school perhaps, you are probably near home, all your support structure is there. So why do you want to chuck that for an academy that might be thousands of miles from home, put you in a stressful environment (college is stressful anyway, but a service academy or military college: think Citadel, VMI, Norwich, etc.) and demand so much extra from you?
If you can answer those questions...your essay will be a breeze!
Steve
USAFA ALO
USAFA '83