R Day or parents weekend ???

Discussion in 'Coast Guard Academy - USCGA' started by runninbob, May 2, 2011.

  1. runninbob

    runninbob Member

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    I have posted this earlier , but at that time it was something of a pipe dream. Now we really have to decide. It will be extremely difficult to make two trips to Connecticut this year . DS says that he would rather see us at parents weekend. My feelings are that there will be four parents weekends, but only 1 R Day . Of course, if at all possible, we would attend both .
    There are other considerations ( siblings out of school in June , can I get vacation time during the busy June period , etc. ).
    Any thoughts ,comments , suggestions would be appreciated .
     
    Last edited: May 2, 2011
  2. BruceRTalbot

    BruceRTalbot Member

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    Go with your son's wishes. Parent's weekend gives you more time and you can buy him a big lobster dinner. My 2 cents
     
  3. longrun12

    longrun12 Member

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    Parent Weekend by far is the best choice. You should try to make each one as cadets progress for one year to the next each one is different. I enjoyed each of my DS more then the last.

    R-Day is one of the hardest days at the academy. Dropping a DS or DD off at what amounts to boot-camp is a strange concept.
     
  4. BruceRTalbot

    BruceRTalbot Member

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    Parents: When ever at the Academy for an event ALWAYS ask your cadet if there is someone in their Company that they know will not have a parent visiting and then "adopt" them for the day--out to dinner or what ever you had planned.

    We have even seen this on R-Day. A new Swab with no family will be given water and a energy bar by a Cadre parents. A few words of encouragement and a parents email to send them a picture of their cadet back home. Priceless.
     
  5. Luigi59

    Luigi59 Banned

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    Go to Parent's Weekend over R-Day.

    On R-Day you'll see him for a while in the early AM before he officially reports, and then around 4PM for about 15 minutes after the public swearing in.

    PW is so much more relaxed. Carry-on is granted at after the march-on at the football game, and they don't have to be back until Sunday evening. They will appreciate the chance to wear civilian clothes and sleep as much as possible, as well as eat without the restrictions they are under while in the wardroom.

    And don't forget about Mystic Flag Ceremony!

    In late July, this is the first public appearance of the swabs, and for the first time you can actually see the remarkable transformation that has occurred in 4 short weeks.
     
  6. Momclassof2014

    Momclassof2014 New Member

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    I would pick R Day over Parents Weekend. There was a bit of activity on the Academy grounds the day before R Day...chances for swabs-to-be to meet others in their company, chances for the parents to meet others, tour Chase Hall, go to information sessions, etc. To be there alone seems like it might be quite awkward and a lonely. And to spend that last night in a hotel without a support group and have to take a cab to report to R Day seems pretty brutal. I know that there are always cases where a parent is unable to be there, but maybe another family member (an aunt or uncle?) could escort them? If you weren't there for Parent's Weekend, it is highly likely that your cadet would be adopted and entertained by another family, or would have a sponsor family to hang with at that point. Parent's Weekend is definitely more FUN, but to me the moral support you provide during R Day (and the night before) is definitely more important.
     
  7. fairwinds

    fairwinds Member

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    We were lucky enough to be able to go to both R-day and Parents' Weekend; however, now looking back, if I would have had to choose, I would say go to PW. DS had to report @8am (if I remember correctly) and was busy the entire day. We listened to speeches and visited to Exchange, but at the end of the day, we got about 10 minutes with him, on the parade field, and it was very rushed and he didn't want to be the last one to get back to his Company. During PW we had alot of time with him, we left the campus, visited Boston and he was totally able to chill. Also, if you attend classes with him on Friday, the 4/c's don't have to "bus."

    My choice would be PW. R-day is really a blur and they are really too busy, hot, tired, stressed to miss your presence.
     
  8. shellz

    shellz Parent

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    RDay was definitely emotional for me. I needed to see my S off on his adventure. The Chase Hall tour and the luncheon the day before helped me feel ok about leaving him there. On Rday, CGA did a phenomenal job of making it ok to leave your kid in their capable hands. I felt good leaving the academy grounds knowing that everything was going to be ok. I needed it.

    There were a lot of "me's" and "I's" in the above paragraph, so I will say that for our S, PW was his weekend. He got to take us to class. He got to walk to and from class like a human being again. He got to get off campus. Of course we got to enjoy all those things too, but really our presence gave him a lot of perks, and let him show us with pride all that he had been up to.

    We were fortunate to attend both, and felt both to be very worthwhile and important events. If we had to choose one, I think we may have divided and conquered...one parent to Rday and one to PW. Just a thought.

    Good luck!
     
  9. Luigi59

    Luigi59 Banned

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    Slight correction - Liberty is granted after the march-on, not carry-on. :wink:
     
  10. Stitch626

    Stitch626 Parent

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    We were able to attend both R-Day & PW with our DD. Still, I would always say attend PW over R-Day. R-Day is a whirlwind for your cadet. You see them off in the AM and then might spy them out on the field during the day, but not to speak to. After swearing-in, they get a hurried 10 minutes to say goodbye.

    Parents Weekend, like others here have posted, you get to go to classes with them on Friday and spend plenty of time with them on Saturday afternoon & Sunday. Also, there may be an opportunity to connect with other parents who are attending R-Day (here on this Forum or on the Parent's USCGA site), who you could request to take pictures for you. Our DD was a CGAS Scholar, so we got to do 2 R-Days. For CGAS, alot of cadets don't have parents with them, so I took alot of pictures of EVERYONE. I shared them on a Shutterfly site and had many grateful parents who found their son or daughter. Every year, I think there are willing parents. Plus Sponsor families, but I'm not sure when Sponsor families and cadets get matched up.
     
  11. cga82

    cga82 Banned

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    Parents weekend, It will be one of the biggest things that he will be looking forward to. It will also be a proud time for you to see the change into a young military man.
     
  12. Bear

    Bear Member

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    Split up and enjoy the 1:1 time

    I too have attended both events and feel both offer memorable moments. My spouse and I split up our time at the academy throughout the academic year. Rarely do we jointly travel to the Academy, because of commitments back home. Our cadet is able to see us more often and enjoys the 1:1 time. Very special moments indeed.
     
  13. runninbob

    runninbob Member

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    Thanks to all. The consensus seems to be that PW is the best choice. It will be tough leaving him at the airport, but I guess that will just be the beginning of his adventure. Plans are underway to be at the academy in Oct. Hope to meet many of you then. .:thumb:
     
    Last edited: May 5, 2011
  14. kfernandez

    kfernandez New Member

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    "And don't forget about Mystic Flag Ceremony!

    In late July, this is the first public appearance of the swabs, and for the first time you can actually see the remarkable transformation that has occurred in 4 short weeks. "

    Does anyone know the date for this event - the parent's group site has information, but the date is last years.

    Mom of a new swab:smile:
     
  15. Luigi59

    Luigi59 Banned

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    You can plan on Saturday July 23 with 95% confidence.

    Keep in mind --- Alfa/Bravo/Charlie companies do not usually attend Mystic as they are usually travelling to Eagle that day.

    But sometimes they do, as 2012 was "lucky" when some of their flights to California were delayed and they were able to participate.

    Semper Gumby.
     
  16. Texas

    Texas Member

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    The Eagle schedule shows that it arrives in Boston on 7/22 & departs on 7/25. When do the swabs typically board? And given that it's so close and won't require air travel, does that increase the odds that the swabs will do the flag ceremony & then head over there? Just trying to make tentative travel plans to visit. And by the way, Thank you very much for all you do to keep people credibly informed!
     
  17. Stitch626

    Stitch626 Parent

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    I went through the same dilemma the year my DD was on Eagle Swab Summer. I didn't know until the day before whether to go to Mystic or Maine. So, I made reservations for a hotel in Mystic, stayed overnight there and drove the rest of the way to Maine the next day, when she knew she was going to be on a bus to Maine. She had her phone back for the Eagle cruise, so she was able to text me while on the bus. Semper Gumby - always flexible! At least Boston is closer to Mystic than Rockland, Maine!
     
  18. LineInTheSand

    LineInTheSand USCGA 2006

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    R-day is worthless and you will end up seeing them a VERY short time. That time is meaningless and can even be more painful. Parents weekend (each parents weekend) is fun.

    I got much more out of Parents Weekend than R-day. By the time I saw my parents during R-day I was already thinking "oh no, what did I get myself into"....not "hey parents, lets have a meaningful conversation."
     
  19. BruceRTalbot

    BruceRTalbot Member

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    Folks, please keep in mind everyone is different. I would have to respectfully disagree that "R-Day is worthless." Emotional? Yes, very. Meaningful conversation? Could very well make the difference between walking away that day (one cadet did last year) or taking away precious words of encouragement "Honey, you can do this! We believe in you."

    It is possible some Swabs might be better off alone on R-Day, however, I think you will see many will draw strength from their parents encouragement. You will also see Cadre parents giving a hug and encouragement to Swabs who's parents are not there.
     
  20. runninbob

    runninbob Member

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    Thanks Bruce. I did really want to be there for R-Day, but after reading these posts, and to respect my sons wishes we will be shooting for parents weekend. The Mystic Flag Ceremony also seems like it would be great, but again getting vacation time at that time of the year is a problem. We look forward to Parents Weekend and perhaps Grandma & Grandpa will even come with us.
     

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