The new TWE - Sent by E-mail Poll

Do you (DS/DD/Parent) prefer getting the TWE by email?

  • Yes, I like getting Bad News, ASAP

    Votes: 40 85.1%

  • No, I like a Thin White Envelope from the Mailbox

    Votes: 7 14.9%
  • Total voters
    47
It's not an email to check portal, it's an email that says they can't offer appointment. No matter how well our children are prepared for disappointment, it still hurts. Yes, it is good to get it over with earlier in the process than drag on for another month with the same result. To quote a favorite movie: “Would you rather get a bullet to the head or fired to the chest and bleed to death?”. I have worked in admissions in an extremely competitive music school where only 1% of the applicants get in -- it broke my heart that many supremely talented musicians do not get in, many times because that year they had a limited number of openings for a particular instrument. So USNA admissions is similar -- let the kids "grieve" a bit if that's what they need to move forward. For my DS, he's the one who his peers call when they problems, get bad news, etc. -- his support system isn't there but in the many adults who have been his mentors. He was not "embarrassed" to let them know, he wanted to do it personally (face-to-face or phone call) rather than letting them hear it from others or via email/text. Bringing him home gave him the privacy to do just that!
 
ktnatalk said:
Agree with 1985. Our children can be doing anything at anytime anywhere, so there isn't a good time to call for everyone. Don't forget folks who live in Hawaii either! They are now six hours behind the east coast (part of the reasons why I gave up football when I was stationed there).

e-appointment could be just as problematic! We were on a road trip when my wife suddenly smiled at me and showed DS's appointment to me on her iPad!

Make sure your DD/DS put their phones away when they drive!
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Out here in Hawaii and when I got NASS, I got an email at 3 AM. I assume most of us will find out before our day even starts!
 
5Day said:
The one suggestion I would make is that they send the email out after school is out. My DS e-TWE came at 11:03 local. Right in the middle of the school day. Most kids these days are connected 24/7 and receiving the e-TWE in the middle of school is probably not the best place. There was a post from one parent that they had to pick the DS up from school because he was so devastated by the bad news. Sent them out sometime around 7PM local. Most likely they are done school and athletics and they are at home with some parental support.

Same with the portat update. Or add a day delay between email and portal update.
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This is what Duke sent out yesterday. I looks like they won't release decisions until 7:00pm for this exact reason and ask the applicants to wait until they are home....image.jpeg
 
I suppose if DS got an email during the school day or at practice he would jump to open it. I am grateful that DS doesn't have access at school or the boathouse. He doesn't have a smart phone just a flip phone in the car for emergencies. (ok, so we're the flintstones!) He walks into the house. Opens his laptop. Checks his email. Checks his status. USMMA: HOLD USNA: CPR - sigh - time for cookies! I think at this point we have practiced the routine enough that having a good plan B and a plate of cookies will be enough to hold the disappointment at bay. We shall see. For now, grateful to still be on the island.
 
fifi5 said:
This is what Duke sent out yesterday. I looks like they won't release decisions until 7:00pm for this exact reason and ask the applicants to wait until they are home....View attachment 513
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This is exactly how my oldest son was able to view the results of his CA state bar exam in 2012 and his WA state bar exam last fall (passed both!). You know when you walk in to the test room on day 1 when the results will be posted. Obviously a test is a little more straight forward than an admission decision, but I think Duke is on the right track......
 
AJC said:
At some point they have to "put their big boy pants" on.
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Exactly. The Duke one seems a little like hand holding. They are trying to become future leaders of the military, at some point they will need a little bit of toughness/thick skin.
 
Row2020 said:
I suppose if DS got an email during the school day or at practice he would jump to open it. I am grateful that DS doesn't have access at school or the boathouse. He doesn't have a smart phone just a flip phone in the car for emergencies. (ok, so we're the flintstones!) He walks into the house. Opens his laptop. Checks his email. Checks his status. USMMA: HOLD USNA: CPR - sigh - time for cookies! I think at this point we have practiced the routine enough that having a good plan B and a plate of cookies will be enough to hold the disappointment at bay. We shall see. For now, grateful to still be on the island.
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Row, sometimes I wish we were still using flip phones! Kudos to you for that.

But if the power to be is going to keep you waiting, your DS will need to keep rowing, and row some more to put the cookies to good use! :)
 
[QUOTE="ktnatalk, post: 474876, member: DS will need to keep rowing, and row some more to put the cookies to good use! :)[/QUOTE]

It's all I can do to keep weight on him!!!
 
It's all I can do to keep weight on him!!![/QUOTE said:
I wish your DS best of luck! May he get to enjoy the high calorie food in King Hall for the next four years!
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They will be dealing with disappointment on their own eventually, so having a parent on hand to soften the blow will not matter in my opinion. DS got "The Worst Email" (yeah, the meaning of the original acronym will be changing now!) while at school. He suffered quietly, came home somberly and was just sad for that evening. The next day he started hitting his plan B harder. Not to say that he is still monumentally disappointed, he just has to do both - grieve and push forward - at the same time. Replace disappointment with a new goal. He never faulted USNA for the timing of the email, just thankful he didn't have to wait another month.
 
heres how I see it. Getting a turn down is simply a closed door for this particular method of entering the service. Nobody got cancer. Nobody died in an accident. You just didn't get into what might be your first choice of a college. If your dream is to pursue a career as a naval officer there are several ways to do that that don't involve USNA. Have we softened and protected our young adults now to such an extent that we must concern ourselves with when and by what method they might receive anything other than good news? My daughter is still standing and I hope she gets an appointment so that she can decide what she wants to do but the last thing I concern myself with is the timing and method of a potential turn down.
 
RB1980 said:
heres how I see it. Getting a turn down is simply a closed door for this particular method of entering the service. Nobody got cancer. Nobody died in an accident. You just didn't get into what might be your first choice of a college. If your dream is to pursue a career as a naval officer there are several ways to do that that don't involve USNA. Have we softened and protected our young adults now to such an extent that we must concern ourselves with when and by what method they might receive anything other than good news? My daughter is still standing and I hope she gets an appointment so that she can decide what she wants to do but the last thing I concern myself with is the timing and method of a potential turn down.
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If you haven't had your daughter go through a dream being slapped away (at least for this year), you really have no idea how she will react. Glad your daughter is still standing, wish her all the best!
 
EOD/SEALmom said:
If you haven't had your daughter go through a dream being slapped away (at least for this year), you really have no idea how she will react. Glad your daughter is still standing, wish her all the best!
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All I can say is that if the dream is that easily extinguished then it was never really a dream. It was just a hope.
 
Are there other paths to commission? Yes, and my daughter is following those at a SMC. She's a fighter and will pursue. But even fighters have emotions arise that you cannot anticipate. Your comments, while I understand them and might have thought similar myself a couple weeks ago, are harsh and not helpful. Also, as I said - you can say everything you're saying now....and if your own daughter gets that TWE you will understand...and likely change your opinion.
 
EOD/SEALmom said:
Are there other paths to commission? Yes, and my daughter is following those at a SMC. She's a fighter and will pursue. But even fighters have emotions arise that you cannot anticipate. Your comments, while I understand them and might have thought similar myself a couple weeks ago, are harsh and not helpful. Also, as I said - you can say everything you're saying now....and if your own daughter gets that TWE you will understand...and likely change your opinion.
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I don't think so. It's the academy's job to say you got in or you didn't get in. Nothing else. My comments are not meant to be harsh. A turn down is not a reflection on the candidate's self worth but is merely a reflection of what the academy needs that particular year. Like I said, I hope my daughter gets an appointment so that she can decide on her terms, but if not I won't question how the academy told her. If you haven't experienced failure you haven't lived a full life. And as Forest Gump said "that's all I have to say about that."
 
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