To all who are waiting.......

Discussion in 'Naval Academy - USNA' started by jennyp, Nov 6, 2009.

  1. jennyp

    jennyp Parent

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    This is the tough time..............waiting. Congressmen are working through the nomination process. You have all put your very best packet together (or should be finishing that application pretty quickly......) And now all that is left is to wait. And wait.

    Only a year ago. Son and I both were checking the candidate page daily and these forums. Knowing full well that we wouldn't likely hear anything until after the first of the year. At least not on nominations. And more likely March for appointment news.

    It is a hard, really hard time. Seems like the days drag. The mailbox is empty, day after day.

    If you can do anything else to enhance your application.......significantly better CFA, improved SAT/ACT scores, concentrate on that now.

    If you are satisfied that your very best possible application is sitting in Annapolis (or any of the other academies) right now, take a deep breath. Although 2010 seems like it is in the distant future, it will be here before you know it. Parents, enjoy this time with your high school seniors. Applicants, enjoy your senior year, but keep out of trouble and continue to study hard!

    Parents, once your child receives an appointment, things change, and change rapidly. Throughout plebe summer, you will talk to them only three times. Once the academic year starts, they are busy, busy, busy. And you are a distant observer. I have had one go through college and is in his first year of vet school and one at USNA, a plebe. The difference is striking. We could, of course, talk to older son often through his college years and offer counsel on various things..........by the end of several years, he sought our advice less often and was well on the way to figuring out adult hood. Our plebe is on his own, almost entirely. He is being trained to handle anything and does not need our counsel at all.

    The plebe does not know until moments before what he is going to be doing. Example: Hubby and I are in Annapolis for Air Force football game. We have flown from Texas, knowing we may not get much time with son at all. Friday afternoon, we are headed for mid store and decide to sit out side on a patio overlooking the mid store main entrance and knowing mids are headed to their classes after lunch and maybe, just maybe, we will see ours. Sure enough, he comes by "Hey, how's it going!" With a big smile on his face. I say "How many classes do you have this afternoon?" He holds up one finger. We go on to shop in mid store (after I dab the tears of happiness!) We strike gold and see him again after class. Get to visit maybe two minutes before his phone rings and he rushes off to stand watch. I told him to call us if he got any free time that evening. (This forum had provided me with the info that he might be able to join us for a coke or something in Dry Dock on Friday evening) He tells us, "I have no idea." We assume he will eat with his company in King Hall, so we leave the yard and head downtown and order a nice, really nice, meal at one of the restaraunts on the waterfront. They had just brought our meals when he called, "Hey, I have a couple hours. Let's get pizza at Dry Dock. Can I bring friends?" Husband races out of restaraunt to get my driver's license which I had left in rental car. I ate a lobster tail in three bites, threw the credit card at the server, and jogged to the main gate. We met our plebe and two friends and waited an hour for pizza for the boys. It was awesome to listen to them talk. Instead of hubby and I peppering our plebe with questions, we learned most of what we wondering about listening to him and his two company mates talk over pizza.

    If somebody had told me I would be thrilled with two brief sitings after coming all the way from Texas, I wouldn't have believed it. And we were accepting that those two brief exchanges might be all we got that weekend!

    They are learning to be totally dependent upon each other. And not on parents! He admitted last week "I'm not gonna lie, Mom, it is ok that somebody makes all the decisions now and we plebes just do as we are told!"

    Enjoy your child now. If they earn an appointment to any academy, they are gone.......... unlike attending a conventional college or university. Things change fast in the lives of these young people. It is a wonderful ride for the whole family.

    But, my message is: breathe. Although you want to push the fast forward button and find out if your kid has earned an appintment, breathe! You'll know soon enough.

    Now, repeat after me. "Thanks for asking. No, we haven't heard anything yet, but do not expect to hear anything from USXA until March."

    Ok, that's my Friday night rant!

    Jenny
     
  2. smle

    smle Member

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    Great Words of Wisdom!

    Jennyp-As I prepare mentally for perhaps the last football game of my sons life, I was struck by your words. We have been trying to wait patiently for word of our son's future (and trying to keep the tears at bay). So many of our friends say as they look through the lens of a "normal" college experience, "He'll be home!" If we try to explain that this is our last ____(you fill in the blank), they just don't "get it" why we(mostly me) are emotional about it. I know that if he gets to have his dream, life as I currently know it will change forever. He won't depend on us anymore but that of his fellow cadets. Today, for the first time since we began this several year journey, I questioned why a mom would support a decision of this nature. After reading your post, I found myself thinking about the young people who choose to serve something greater than themselves and how wonderful they really are. It helped me to remember why I support this decision for him. He has always been that kind of kid. The kind of kid who puts the needs of others in front of his own. Thank you for helping me refresh my memory and for giving me that internet pat on the back as I enjoy every last second I have with him. It is so refreshing to hear someone else feels the same as we do and truly understands what it's like! Thank you for sharing your experience.
     
  3. NavIss58

    NavIss58 Member

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    jenny and smle, I'm a man of few words, thanks for that message.

    The wait is killing me and the knowledge of my son going straight to man is difficult. I will see him again, maybe, maybe not in this profession. But as smle said he's "the kind of kid who puts the needs of others in front of his own". I've seen that from a very early age.

    It is his destiny. And I'm okay with that. It is a good thing.
     
  4. jennyp

    jennyp Parent

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    smle: You'll get plenty of use out of those tears. Once you are at I-Day and subsequent visits, you will be overwhelmed with pride and the amazing awareness what your kiddo is doing. And how it is so much more than the conventional experience.

    I can only imagine what is to come when mine is out in the fleet.

    Also, it might help to have that back up plan in place as you wait. Part of what we did while waiting was get the application in to Texas A&M and doing scholarship applications.

    My son also planned to re-apply if he did not receive an appointment for the class of 2013. He was firm in that decision. So, I think we were ready if the Thin White Envelope (TWE) showed up in the mail.

    NavIss58: I like that line: "my son going straight to man...." In a nutshell, that is exactly what happens. No bringing that laundry home to Mom, no heading to the bars or sorority/fraternity houses, no skipping classes!
     
  5. marvin7794

    marvin7794 Member

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    Is this for real? It can't be real. I suppose it is great to be a proud parent of a mid, but don't get all high and mighty and think your kid is the second coming. Not heading out to bars, right. You wait until 21 hits and it will be on like Donkey Kong. Until that point, any weekend away from their cell block will be a constant race to find free food, free shelter and free drinks before the weekend is over. Jennyp, sounds like your kid has (or had) poor time management skills working against him during your AF week visit.
     
  6. NavIss58

    NavIss58 Member

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    thanks for the reality check marvin, but I think you may be talking to parents that know you can get a civilian college degree by poolside.

    He's not the second coming but he is taking a higher road less traveled.
     
  7. marvin7794

    marvin7794 Member

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    agreed.
     
  8. fairwinds

    fairwinds Member

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    Jennyp,

    Thank you for your post. It means so much to many of us to hear your thoughtful words of experience. This is a choice my son has made, and I am fully supporting it. The waiting is very difficult. As has been posted, he seems to be handling better than me. His backup plans are in place and we are just in waiting mode. Thanks again for your insights.
     
  9. jennyp

    jennyp Parent

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    marvin, I'm not suggesting my kid is the second coming. Heck, he may not even be the third coming! And, believe it or not, I attended college. The drinking age was 18 and I exercised my rights often.

    I am simply relating what I and every other parent I have visited with at I-Day, PPW, and Air Force weekend have expressed. The choices you and my son and others have made is indeed admirable. And not the same as a civilian college or university. I went to two of those. I am sincere in believing the choice you have made is truly the higher road.

    I will suggest my plebe work on his time management skills.
     
  10. NV_USMA_Mom

    NV_USMA_Mom Member

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    Thank you!

    jennyp-thank you!

    I appreciate your willingness to share your thoughts and insights! It is a difficult time for some of us waiting for our children to hear the news that their dreams are coming true. It is nice to know that there are others sharing our experience.

    smle-I couldn't have said it better myself! Thank you!
     

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