Would anyone be willing to read my essay?

Discussion in 'Naval Academy - USNA' started by Phildog, Oct 5, 2013.

  1. Phildog

    Phildog Member

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    I have just created my essay for the Naval Academy. Yeah, I know I should try to get an english teacher or a parent read it, but I feel more comfortable having someone that is going through the same thing as me reading it. Please let me know and I will PM you!. It is only 500 words. Thanks!
     
  2. hthp37

    hthp37 Member

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    That's probably not a great idea. Appointments are relatively scarce and the process intensely competitive. It would behoove you to find someone you know and trust and whose honest opinion you value. Isn't all of your effort at least worth that?
     
  3. d22

    d22 Member

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    My advice would be to be yourself; let your essay reflect who you are, and capture the readers attention quickly.

    My eldest (who had no desire to attend SA's)had a life threatening illness, and used his experience as his essay. He was admitted into several top UC's. Not sure if it had anything to do with his essay, but it definately was powerful.

    Another examlpe. My son's friend who was admitted into Stanford wrote about his friends. They have an eclectic group that have been friends since Jr. High. All types of backgrounds i.e., a socialist Russian, a liberal, a Christian conservative, a Muslim, an atheist etc. The wonderful, unique quatlity all these young men had was tolerance. They'd have some passionate debates about their beliefs, yet through all that,they managed to keep a sense of humor, and to this day are all very good friends.

    As a note, all his friends are at top UC's. I only know the subject matter of two individuals. Both who captured themselves, their experiences, and their readers early on in their essay's.

    I hope this helps. Good luck!
     
    Last edited: Oct 6, 2013
  4. MedB

    MedB Parent

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    </rant on>

    What the heck is with high schools today and how they teach writing? It used to be that persuasive writing was part-and-parcel to a proper education. But sadly it seems that has gone away.

    Am I the only one that remembers having to turn in a detailed outline of essays to be graded? An engaging introduction supported by a series of paragraphs, each centered on a single persuasive supporting arguement, was drilled into us. My experiences with high schoolers, even the best and brightest of them, indicates those types of writing standards have gone by the wayside.

    Maybe the various state and common-core standards have de-emphasized the importance of writing. Or maybe there is just too much to cover in order to score well on the standardized tests that teachers are increasingly judged by. But for whatever reason, persuasive writing seems to have taken a backseat in the typical high school curriculum today.

    In era of ever-increasing rapidity of communication, the ability of our young people to communicate effectively and persuasively is more important than ever. How ironic is it then, that our high schools have walked away from this imperative right now? Maybe it's time to revisit the "old fashioned" approach to teaching writing in order to leverage the best of what it has to offer students in today's world.

    </rant off>


    Phildog,

    I applaud you for wanting to turn in an essay that reflects well on you. My advice would mirror what others here have said; write from the heart and show some passion. Don't be afradid to take a clear position, and support it with persuasive arguements. I would suspect the actual content is secondary to the review boards. They want to see your passion and how you "make the case". Good luck.
     
    Last edited: Oct 7, 2013
  5. navymomwannabe

    navymomwannabe Member

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    +1 MedB

    I am so disappointed in the way the curriculum has changed in recent years. My kids can't write in cursive, my elementary daughter struggles with math facts (the only math EVERYONE uses for the rest of their life) because they no longer memorize anything and don't get me started on the state standardized tests.
     

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