Basic Question about DS leaving home.

[CoachBart]

Hi, I am not sure if this question belongs on this forum or not. Please feel free to direct me to the right place if I am wrong. My DS leaves for North Georgia on Thur this week. He and I are very close. He is super excited about going away and I am happy for him to realize his dream of going to a SMC. Its kind of embarrassing for me I guess to admit that I am feeling anxiety because I am starting to miss him and he has not even left yet! I did not think I would ever have these type of feelings. I guess you could say I even feel kind of panicky (is that even a word). Its just hard not to see him as my little boy (even though he is 195 lbs of solid muscle!). So I am just wondering am I alone in feeling this way or should I just "man up" and put it out of my mind. And for those of you who have dealt with this situation what do you recommend I do to feel "normal" about this. Thanks for listening because I definately needed to vent about this.

[NorwichDad]

Originally Posted by CoachBart

So I am just wondering am I alone in feeling this way or should I just "man up" and put it out of my mind.

The feeling never goes away. No need to man up, your a great parent. What helps is how you see them progress and grow up. There a point where you stop telling them what to do and just listen. That is when you know you have done your job as a parent.

Originally Posted by CoachBart

And for those of you who have dealt with this situation what do you recommend I do to feel "normal" about this.

You will never feel normal, you are a parent.

[ArielsMom]

My my youngest DD leaves on the 18th and I am becoming more clingy by the day. I never thought that I would be "one of those moms" who goes to pieces when their child leaves home, and I was not for my older DD, but this time around it is different. The thought of being an empty-nester is somewhat terrifying to me and although logically I know of all the possibilities it will open up my heart is just not there yet.

[dunninla]

sounds normal to me, but I don't know how to deal with it, or even it it needs to be dealt with... just do your best to get through it.

[49er]

My son reports to The Citadel on Saturday (August 11, 2012). In our (mom and dad) minds we thought we would spend the last weeks with him fishing, visiting the mountains and etc. Of course he has been hiking in the mountains and spent several days fishing but for some reason he took some very attractive young ladies along instead of mom and dad. So much for quality time with the family. I know how the original poster feels. The past 15 months or so has been such a journey, visiting schools, going to interviews and etc. I feel privilege to been able to walk along side of him on this part of the trip. We had some very adult conversations along the way about serving in the military, possibly having to take another life, spending summers in training, his faith in God and so many other things. We are so proud of him and the young man he has become.

My thirteen year old daughter always likes to tell people she has never seen her father cry, Saturday might be her first opportunity for that.

[-Bull-]

You've done good dad. Now the upperclassmen and cadre he is about to meet are about to take him from here on out. He'll be in good hands.

[Luigi59]

Originally Posted by 49er

My thirteen year old daughter always likes to tell people she has never seen her father cry, Saturday might be her first opportunity for that.

Claim a high pollen count, works every time.

[EDelahanty]

Originally Posted by 49er

My son reports to The Citadel on Saturday (August 11, 2012). In our (mom and dad) minds we thought we would spend the last weeks with him fishing, visiting the mountains and etc. Of course he has been hiking in the mountains and spent several days fishing but for some reason he took some very attractive young ladies along instead of mom and dad. So much for quality time with the family. I know how the original poster feels. The past 15 months or so has been such a journey, visiting schools, going to interviews and etc. I feel privilege to been able to walk along side of him on this part of the trip. We had some very adult conversations along the way about serving in the military, possibly having to take another life, spending summers in training, his faith in God and so many other things. We are so proud of him and the young man he has become.

My thirteen year old daughter always likes to tell people she has never seen her father cry, Saturday might be her first opportunity for that.

Your post reminded me of a detail I had managed to put aside for nearly two years. We had to leave at about 4:00 a.m. to take young Delahanty to the airport. Rather than go to bed early or spend a quiet evening with the family, he elected to spend his time with his then girlfriend and pulled into the driveway at around 3:30. Driving in the dark and sleeping on the plane, it wasn't until we landed that we noticed the huge purple splotch on his neck.

After overcoming their initial amusement, the cadre made him wear an enormous bandage to cover it up. Great way to make a first impression.

[CoachBart]

Thanks, I see I am not alone. I appreciate ya'll listening.

[Pima]

Coach,

Your emotions are common, and they never go away. I have 2 that are not going military, 1 that is now an O1. There was a difference for me with DS1. It wasn't about him going off to college, it was more about realizing our home would never be his home again. He would graduate and commission, we would have to accept that his life was where the military took him.

College kids going off are hard enough, but you can pretend they will move back to your town, and have Sunday dinners after they graduate. It is not forever, or for an unseen future. You just can't do that with ROTC kids, you have to accept that summer vacation is filled with training, that upon graduation they leave. It is a finite time line.

Old poster here, come Oct. that missing the kid, will be gone. It will be replaced with posting: Explain this, our DS is now speaking in acronyms and I can't follow.

Next yr you will have him do the shoulder roll out of the car with his stuff. because you are in a different place.

It is a new chapter, and it is normal to feel your way.