PPW - Things not to do

MIHOSER

5-Year Member
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Dec 23, 2009
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Ok, you experienced parents, what would you advise us newbies not to do on PPW? We have received a lot of advice about what we should do, i.e. restaurants, harbor tours, movie theaters, etc.

Did you do something that in retrospect you wish you had skipped, beside the obvious thing of letting the Plebe decide what he wants to do? Within the bounds of propriety on a public forum, what should we not do?
 
You already have the A #1 priority. What your PLEBE wants to do is the first choice. Can't think of anything they might do outside propriety on a weekend with their parents.:biggrin: Maybe get caught in civilian clothes by a 1/c in a Hotel or restaurant? 1/c are lurking around the area as they also have liberty. Daughter went berserk at a restaurant when her 1/c squad leader was sitting at the next table with his family:shake: She was in Whites but I would reccomend wearing the required uniform.
 
The "propriety" reference was a suggestion not to trash a local establishment or service company in your reply.

What I am looking for, for instance only, is something like "don't take a harbor tour, they are a waste of time" or "don't go to this area, there's nothing to do there" - that type of thing.
 
Do not go to Cantlers or any other "Crab Houses" Your Plebes are in Whites and extremely nervous about getting dirty - why put them in that position. Save Cantlers, which is a very fun place to go, for another time when they are in Blues or 2nd Class year in civvies.

Skip the Harbor Tour not that good AND it is too close to the yard. They want out of Dodge! They don't even want to see the place during liberty.
 
I went to Cantler's my PPW and it was delicious. Personal preference? Let the freshman drive the show. If you want to go eat downtown, and they want to watch Jersey Shore and eat take out in the hotel room, you're eating take out in the hotel room with Snooki. Don't piss them off, they've earned that much from you.
 
I went to Cantler's my PPW and it was delicious. Personal preference? Let the freshman drive the show. If you want to go eat downtown, and they want to watch Jersey Shore and eat take out in the hotel room, you're eating take out in the hotel room with Snooki. Don't piss them off, they've earned that much from you.
And thus begins the relationship where you have given them the impression that they have earned the right to walk all over you.
 
Things not to do during PPW

Just a fast note of caution:thumb::

Don't get over-confident about commuting back to the yard each evening to deposit your plebe...allow plenty of time for any unexpected contingency.
2008 ,Sunday morning of PPW there was a very tragic wreck on the Bay Bridge (US 50) that restricted traffic ALL DAY (including alternate routes near Gate 8)....after fighting bumper to bumper gridlock for over an hour and with only 25 min prior to expiration of Leave many Plebes were seen jumping out of cars in a panic and running the last 1.5 + miles for Bancroft(my plebe included)....not the calm and collected goodbye we had intended.

GO NAVY,
 
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We've done the harbor tour before at sunset and found it a very nice tour. I enjoyed seeing the yard from the vantage point of the Severn River. If you think your plebe is going to want to get out of dodge then do the harbor tour on Thursday if you get in early enough.
 
And thus begins the relationship where you have given them the impression that they have earned the right to walk all over you.

I don't know where you're going with this.

Best thing, plan nothing. I dot think I would have ever forgiven my mom if she had made a bunch of plans.

If he wants to sit alone for a while, let him. He wont get much alone time for the rest of plebe year. And leave him alone every so often to give him some "me time." This is for reasons that need not be said.
 
The "agenda" for PPW has a lot of events, most of which sound really fun to parents and most of which sound really unfun to plebes. They have spent the last 6+ weeks on the Yard. The last thing most of them want to do is hang out on the Yard during PPW.

So, do your Midstore shopping before you see them. Skip the King Hall meal this visit. There will be other "ships in the Yard" during the 4 yrs. Classrooms will be open for visiting 2/C PPW -- they'll look the same. You get the idea.

Annapolis can be very small when there is a major activity on the Yard. Restaurants will be crowded. The roads back to USNA will be packed. Be prepared. When your plebe starts twitching 2 hrs before curfew, it's time to head back.

I know it might be disappointing to you, especially parents who haven't been to USNA or haven't spent much time there. Just remember, this is a 4-yr journey and there will be other times to do the things you miss this WE.
 
Well stated. I didn't know that letting someone relax a little bit after being released from a 6 week lab experiment was equal to letting them walk all over you.
 
Well stated. I didn't know that letting someone relax a little bit after being released from a 6 week lab experiment was equal to letting them walk all over you.
An inflated false sense of entitlement can get messy down the road. Before judging, wait awhile until you are able to recognize things from the opposite perspective.

A lot of parents have travelled a long distance at great expense for perhaps their first visit to USNA. To not let them see it is selfish.
 
There is nothing wrong with the grown ups sightseeing and wandering around town, but it is best done when the freshman is not on liberty, in my opinion. They will be stuck there for the next 3 years and 8 months and will have plenty of time to do the town right. I would surmise that parents who come for the weekend come to see their kid first and sight see second. At least that was always the feeling I got when my parents or those of my friends came to visit Annapolis. They let us pick the restaurant, the movie, the bar, or the museum in DC that we wanted to go see. And sometimes we compromised on locations. As far as a sense of entitlement goes, I don't see any harm in a parent giving a little extra individual attention to someone who spends 95% of their time in a place where individualism and personal preference do not really exist.
 
An inflated false sense of entitlement can get messy down the road. Before judging, wait awhile until you are able to recognize things from the opposite perspective.

A lot of parents have travelled a long distance at great expense for perhaps their first visit to USNA. To not let them see it is selfish.

Yeah, I see the sense of entitlement you're claiming. I would dread a visit from my parents if they tried to control me on my liberty.
 
I'm going on memory and a quick look at the PPW schedule, but there does seem to be a middle ground. Parents who arrive before noon Friday have time to visit the Midstore and engage on other activities on the Yard. And, I enjoyed going to church w/my parents (on the Yard) Sunday.

Some plebes may be really excited to show their parents around the Yard during the WE -- others may want to get out of there as fast as possible and hit TV, a pool, room service, the mall, etc.

If you know this may be your only time at USNA until graduation (and, for some parents, it may be), your mid will realize that too and probably will want to show you around. If you (and your mid) know this will be the first of several/many visits, the mid will probably want to defer some of the activities to future months/years.

I think I ONCE took my parents to eat in King Hall, not b/c I wanted to do it but b/c I knew they wanted to do it. We never did the ship in the Yard b/c my parents (who were military) didn't have a great desire to do it. I think we visited one classroom -- it looked like a classroom. That was enough for both of us. Kids and parents will figure this out.

Back to the original question -- the only "no no" I can think of is getting your mid back late to Mother B. Missing curfew is not a good way to start Ac Yr. Plan ahead, leave PLENTY of time. I cannot emphasize that enough. 1000+ cars all approaching Annapolis on two tiny roads . . . it's not pretty.
 
Don't worry, folks. I'm here to bring a level-headedness that only an Army guy can offer ;)

There have been good points on both sides. Though PPW at WP is different than it is at Canoe U., some things are universal.

1. First and foremost, they are YOUR KID. You raised them from the moment they came screeching into this world until the moment they entered USNA. While they've been through some changes, you know them best. You know what makes your kid happy. If he grew up as a sleeper, let him take a long nap. If he lives for movies, go to a movie. If he loves showing you his achievements, let him take you around the Yard. You're not going to Annapolis to meet your new adopted child from Ethiopia. It's your child. Everything will click and you will find that happy middle ground, a skill you no doubt mastered in the process of raising such an exemplary child.

2. Mongo's advice isn't bad. Yes, your child had a long six weeks. But it was only six weeks of what is, in the end, not that grueling of an experience. It was not that hard (though it seemed so at the time), and they will face much harder times in their careers. Don't give in to the idea that he deserves the world now. Especially don't be a party to behavior that you know is off limits, such as civilian clothes. You raised him right. He knows the rules. Don't let your desire to pamper cause you to allow your child to think he can "get away" with something. The rules are part of military life. Be a part of the "right" mentality as a military parent. You're still mom and dad.

3. Enjoy yourselves. You were good parents and deserve to see a few things on the yard if you'd like.

4. Relax. It's a crowded weekend. Enjoy it for what it is.

5. Everything will take twice as long as you think it will.

Have fun!
 
Can't even think that getting to visit my plebe next week-end could be used in the same paragraph as beware of spoiling him. He worked very hard to get into the Academy and I know Plebe summer has not been easy... This is the first time we get to see him all summer, I'm so proud of what he's accomplished already and truely think he deserves a week-end of doing the things he'd like to do, which will probably include sleep, long hot showers, a little computer social networking time, some of his favorite food and relaxing! Can't wait to see him!
 
Can't even think that getting to visit my plebe next week-end could be used in the same paragraph as beware of spoiling him. He worked very hard to get into the Academy and I know Plebe summer has not been easy... This is the first time we get to see him all summer, I'm so proud of what he's accomplished already and truely think he deserves a week-end of doing the things he'd like to do, which will probably include sleep, long hot showers, a little computer social networking time, some of his favorite food and relaxing! Can't wait to see him!

If one were to poll the fleet several years ago for the one single trait that defined most USNA grads, ‘Arrogance’ would probably lead the list. Admiral Fowler recognized this and, when he checked on board, commenced a push for “confidence with humility”, the term I think he used. Where does this attitude come from and why does it appear to be worse at USNA than the other two S As? I don’t think the training one receives contributes to it. However, first off, I feel that location plays a role. Annapolis is a fish bowl. USNA is it’s prime tourist attraction. Midshipmen are paraded to the nation’s tourist as something special. Some eighteen year olds cannot handle this. Being special goes to their head.

Now to the comment on this thread. They have just completed six weeks of training. Six weeks that no one in reasonable physical shape with a modicum of drive could not complete. Six weeks that is different, but no more difficult, than hundreds of thousands of young men and women accomplish every year at each of the military service’s basic training. Six weeks that begin a journey, not end it.

I feel that parents, from hometown news releases to plebe summer care packages to kowtowing to their every desire contributes to this feeling of their thinking they are something special. For the parents who have offspring in both a SA and StateU, how many of the SA ones are ‘jealous’ , for lack of a better word, of the attention that their StateU sibling receives? Vice versa?

The ultimate outcome of this is, of course, their peers, once they get into the fleet, thinking they are arrogant. Also, one of the issues that Admiral Fowler was facing was that sense of entitlement which caused midshipmen, among many other things, to, wearing nothing but Speedos and cowboy boots, think that it was perfectly acceptable to harass female passengers on a spring break Caribbean cruise.

Just my opinion and something to keep in mind when you have flown 3000 miles to feel that you are obligated only to watch your offspring drool on a pillow.
 
Some eighteen year olds cannot handle this. Being special goes to their head.

A lot of mids set up USNA as such an ultimate goal that acceptance serves as a validation that they really are as cool and awesome as they think they are. Not to mention way too much "best and the brightest" rhetoric from the institution that is just silly (I could write an essay on why mids are not the best and the brightest, just good). Plus frankly, the Academy isn't exactly enjoyable for four years, so mids need to find some way to justify the experience by believing that it must make them better than ROTC (otherwise why put yourself through it), and the institution encourages this mindset.

Just saying I don't think parents play a huge part in the arrogance, I think it's institutional.
 
If one were to poll the fleet several years ago for the one single trait that defined most USNA grads, ‘Arrogance’ would probably lead the list. Admiral Fowler recognized this and, when he checked on board, commenced a push for “confidence with humility”, the term I think he used. Where does this attitude come from and why does it appear to be worse at USNA than the other two S As? I don’t think the training one receives contributes to it. However, first off, I feel that location plays a role. Annapolis is a fish bowl. USNA is it’s prime tourist attraction. Midshipmen are paraded to the nation’s tourist as something special. Some eighteen year olds cannot handle this. Being special goes to their head.

Now to the comment on this thread. They have just completed six weeks of training. Six weeks that no one in reasonable physical shape with a modicum of drive could not complete. Six weeks that is different, but no more difficult, than hundreds of thousands of young men and women accomplish every year at each of the military service’s basic training. Six weeks that begin a journey, not end it.

I feel that parents, from hometown news releases to plebe summer care packages to kowtowing to their every desire contributes to this feeling of their thinking they are something special. For the parents who have offspring in both a SA and StateU, how many of the SA ones are ‘jealous’ , for lack of a better word, of the attention that their StateU sibling receives? Vice versa?

The ultimate outcome of this is, of course, their peers, once they get into the fleet, thinking they are arrogant. Also, one of the issues that Admiral Fowler was facing was that sense of entitlement which caused midshipmen, among many other things, to, wearing nothing but Speedos and cowboy boots, think that it was perfectly acceptable to harass female passengers on a spring break Caribbean cruise.

Just my opinion and something to keep in mind when you have flown 3000 miles to feel that you are obligated only to watch your offspring drool on a pillow.

I agree with most of this. The arrogance is recognized, and it is looked down upon by many midshipmen.

I still completely disagree with your parents day theory though. They made the choice to go there, they accomplished it on their own, the liberty is their time. Stealing their time from them will just make them feel like a high school student again. Unless you did all of the work for them to get there, they are entitled to that liberty.
 
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