Please help me with a response

Just stumbled on this thread and had to laugh. This is what I got the other day. "The Naval Academy? But your son is so smart, I can't believe he's not going to college!"
Funny. My DD's cousin enlisted in the air force because she thought my DD was enlisting in the Army and West Point was a boot camp! I'll never forget the look on her face when she discovered DD was actually going to college and will become an Army Officer!
 
It's amazing how little most people know about the academies. My son attends a small high school in southern Ohio. After he was appointed, one of football friends decided he wanted to apply in late January. Looked up the information and was blown away by the acceptance rate alone. Many of his peers were unaware how difficult it is to be appointed.
 
My son is doing AF ROTC so while it's not the same as attending one of the academies, we do get some of same questions and comments. I think the main problem is that so few people actually know anyone who has served and their knowledge is based on the news and the military. I have no real info on this but I have to imagine that those in the middle class and above have little to no connection to military life. Without this knowledge people make dumb comments or ask dumb questions . It isn't really their fault, they just don't know better. It's funny because my wife is Israeli and in Israel, it's completely the opposite . It almost impossible not to know someone who hasn't served , so everyone knows.
 
I have to imagine that those in the middle class and above have little to no connection to military life.

I'm sure you did not mean for this to come across in a bad way, but the assumption is far from true. Connection to the military has nothing to do with income level. I think you will find even on this forum folks from all levels who are or have been in the military as well as those whose families have a long tradition of military service, such as ours.
 
DD's best friends went to Stanford and University of Chicago. Their parents could not believe what we went through for SA application and acceptance. I would think that those in the middle class and above have a lot of connection or commitment as many of us have served.
 
I didnt mean to sound like only kids from poor families go into the military. Far from it. I am sure all income levels are represented. Having said that, I dont know anyone in my personal circle of friends and family who have served.
I have two sons and we used to socialize with the parents of his classmates and except for one, none had ever served. This one guy was actually drafted and became a Air Force pilot. He was older than me and must have just missed the end of the draft. The only other person I know is a schoolmate of my son who is now at West Point. Maybe it my circle of friends that is the issue. However, I stand by the fact that most people today have no connection with the military. I dont personally know one person who served in Afghanistan, Iraq or the Gulf War. I have older clients and many of served in WWII and Korea and a few from Vietnam. Nothing after that

I'm sure you did not mean for this to come across in a bad way, but the assumption is far from true. Connection to the military has nothing to do with income level. I think you will find even on this forum folks from all levels who are or have been in the military as well as those whose families have a long tradition of military service, such as ours.
 
I didnt mean to sound like only kids from poor families go into the military. Far from it. I am sure all income levels are represented. Having said that, I dont know anyone in my personal circle of friends and family who have served.
I have two sons and we used to socialize with the parents of his classmates and except for one, none had ever served. This one guy was actually drafted and became a Air Force pilot. He was older than me and must have just missed the end of the draft. The only other person I know is a schoolmate of my son who is now at West Point. Maybe it my circle of friends that is the issue. However, I stand by the fact that most people today have no connection with the military. I dont personally know one person who served in Afghanistan, Iraq or the Gulf War. I have older clients and many of served in WWII and Korea and a few from Vietnam. Nothing after that

I did not continue with other thoughts earlier, but I believe knowledge of the military, Service Academies, ROTC, and so forth has more of a geographical and social circle (for lack of a better term) relationship than economic.

If you don't live near a military area or have few acquaintances or family with a military background, you will probably be less knowledgeable about the opportunities. Even the small community we live near and its school that my daughters attended and from which they graduated, had little knowledge about Service Academies until my youngest DD was appointed. Although, several students attending are from military families, I don't think there is a huge amount of association between the groups. When there is, it is as one neighbor to another, with not necessarily a lot of indepth discussion of work.
 
I have encountered a few laughable, uneducated, even borderline rude questions and comments from friends and acquaintances on this journey. I find myself saying, "bless your heart" more often than actually taking the time to explain or correct their erroneous thinking about USMA. Mostly, I don't care what others think or believe. If they want to know, they will research and learn. I know how hard my son has worked to get here. I know how happy he is with his life path. I am blessed beyond measure to be a part of his journey and that's good enough for me.
 
My friends know how hard I have worked through this application process, but have never really asked about it. Last week, a friend asked, "so after these four years of boot camp, will USMA pay for your education?"

and...since I had started my application junior year, many of my peers were confused when I showed up for the first day of senior year because they thought I had been "shipped off" already.
 
I ran into an aquaintance the other day. She asked about one of my sons' college plans, and I mentioned that he was very interested in a service academy. She looked at me aghast and said, he might have to go to war! She gave me a look like I was a terrible mother for even supporting such a goal. I could not think of a quick response and had to leave quickly because I had to be somewhere.

We are not from a military family, and in all honesty it has taken me a while to get used to the idea of him going into the military. But I have come to peace with it because I know this is a calling he has believed in for years.

Can parents help me come up with a respectful response to those who question the sanity of sending off a child to the military? I have a feeling more of these comments may be coming our way. How do you respond?

Most of my acquaintances were knowledgeable enough to understand, but I'd drop these on the "uneducated" ones occasionally in 2009 when he went.

"With all of the opportunities he had coming out of high school, I am so incredibly proud of the courage he showed in making the choice to attend USAFA."
"Isn't it great that some of the best and the brightest are still willing to serve?"

My DS "lands in the sand" for a deployment for the first time here in a couple months. Thinking about it now, I'd say ...

"With all of the opportunities he had coming out of high school, I am so incredibly proud of the courage he showed in making the choice to attend USAFA."
"Isn't it great that some of the best and the brightest are still willing to serve?"

Peace be with the families of the airmen lost at Cannon AFB this week.

DTK
 
You know; sometimes there is no proper response to some people's bias' and ignorance. The bias of course is against the military. Not everyone in the country is as patriotic or pro-military as our children who apply to the academies; or those that come in through ROTC, OTS, or enlisted. Many of these people are plain mean with their opinions. There is no proper response. The same 1st amendment rights that your military children will swear to protect and defend, is the same freedom of speech right that allows some people to have opinions about the military that is hateful. We (Military Personnel) do not get to choose which rights to defend. We defend the rights of all Americans. Even if we disagree with the speech that they are exercising. Just know in your heart that these same people, who express such mean comments, wouldn't be allowed to have such freedom of speech if it wasn't for people like your son/daughter who applied to the academy, ROTC, OTS, or enlisted.

As for the "Idiots" who think "Your son/daughter is so smart. Why aren't they going to College instead of the Military". Well, just like defending a person's right to free speech, we also protect and ensure that everyone has the RIGHT to be an IDIOT too; if they choose. For these people, it's usually just adequate to tell these people: "The military is SENDING him to COLLEGE FIRST, before he starts serving in the military". This works for both the academy, ROTC, and even Enlisted. (Enlisted Tech School in most branches, "Definitely in the Air Force", earns College credits). If they ask "What College", just say his/her "College is in Colorado/New York/Maryland/etc." or wherever. If they want more details, you can get specific.

Of course, there are some who are a little of BOTH. They are Biased against the military, and at the same time STUPID, and don't understand anything about the academies. Unfortunately, one of my son's High School teachers fell into this category. When this teacher found out my son was accepted to the air force academy, he actually told my son; to his face; that he was "Wasting his Life/Future". He said as someone so smart, ranked #1 in his class, going into the military was a total waste of talent and potential. These people..... you just have to blow off. Don't try to explain it to them. Don't try and convince them. The funny thing about this particular teacher and his opinions....... My son, at 25 years old; got his bachelor's from the Academy at 22; got his Master's from RAND at 23; and Finished his PhD from RAND at 25. He has surpassed his 40 year old HS teacher in education and future earning potential, and has done it all while serving his country and having $0.00 in student loans or debt. Unfortunately, the biased and ignorant won't recognize or accept these truths.

So; the Biased, just let them know that they wouldn't even be able to have their biased opinion if not for our sons/daughters/moms/dads/etc who served/serving/will serve in the military. For the ignorant; just explain the military is sending your kid to COLLEGE BEFORE they start serving. Technically; it's the truth. For the combined Biased/Ignorant..... Just blow them off and don't waste your time on them. They don't want to learn; they won't admit they are wrong; and they won't listen to a word you say anyway. They aren't worth your time.
 
@Christcorp - how thoughtful of that teacher to so freely share his opinion with your son.
This sort of thing just boggles the mind. How an educator can be so uneducated in an area of higher education. Shaking my head...

And kudos to your son for his accomplishments.
 
I avoid many of the silly questions and what not because I started a secret Facebook page Back when this began for our kid.

On that page, I added many of my friends, all of my family, etc. our kid, my wife, and the rest of her family did the same thing.

I update it every so often with photos and stories and links. I updated it quite a bit during basic with the numerous photos from web guy.

Now instead of trying to tell 100 people something in person I just post there and get them in one fell swoop. Our kid also chimes in once in a great while on the page and the people he catches up with when he's home will post pictures on the page.

It has worked very nicely. I highly recommend it, and suggest making it a "secret" page. It has worked so well that now when I encounter somebody with questions I ask them if they would like me to add them to the page

We have friends, family, former teachers, coaches, etc!
 
jag3, that is a TERRIFIC idea! Did you create the FB page during the application process or after he was appointed?
 
DH did the same as jag3 after DD was appointed, although probably fewer "friends". DD posts to it occasionally as well. Includes some family, close and trustworthy friends, and past teachers and coaches. First FB account DD ever had. Me, I'm kinda left out...no FB account, so only get to see when DH shows me.
 
Right before Spring break, my guidance counselor asked me where I decided to attend college. I told her "the Navy"(didn't have time to explain NAPS). Her response was "Oh, I thought you were trying to get into West Point?"
What the....!!?!!
The principal, director of guidance, house principal, most of my friends, teachers, and even the BOYS' FOOTBALL coach knew this girl was trying to get into the USNA. If I responded to my guidance counselor the way I wanted to, I probably would have been suspended. I just walked away...Maybe silence is the perfect response.
 
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Right before Spring break, my guidance counselor asked me where I decided to attend college. I told her "the Navy"(didn't have time to explain NAPS). Her response was "Oh, I thought you were trying to get into West Point?"
What the....!!?!!
The principal, director of guidance, house principal, most of my friends, teachers, and even the BOYS' FOOTBALL coach knew this girl was trying to get into the USNA. If I responded to my guidance counselor the way I wanted to, I probably would have been suspended. I just walked away...Maybe silence is the perfect response.
Don't know how old the guidance counselor is but some of us older folks don't have the best of hearing. Every time you said USNA she may have heard USMA. It happens. Just ask my wife. Or maybe she thinks all services go to USMA, in which case she has a lot to learn.
 
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