Nomination Essay Assistance

It's your essay. It needs to be about you. You care enough to apply a second time. Tell them why. I'm no English teacher but to me the Mt Olympus stuff is just too flowery.

Google "Hacking the College Essay 2017" it says to "write the essay only you could write."

I see 1/3 is about olympus, 1/3 is about your grandfather, and 1/3 is about you. It needs to be more about you.

And for you , it seems like you are saying that you want to go because he went.

You want to live a life of service...but why the military? Why the Naval Academy given that you are in NROTC?