Hello! I started dating a naval submarine officer a few months ago and things were going really well, (eg, he met my family and I met his fellow officers, etc). He let me know the dates he was going to be deploying and then I didn't hear from him suddenly and I found out he was around for about a week before he left and just wasn't able to talk for some reason. It's his first time actually out on a deployment underwater. Is that normal? Do sub guys ever have to surrender phones, etc before setting out?
Though we have come a long way from letters as the sole means of communications with deployed people, especially Navy, it's a simple matter of mission parameters, capability, capacity and security.
There is an old sub movie, "Run Silent, Run Deep," the title of which about sums it up. That's their mission. For subs to remain "invisible," they don't leave traceable evidence in their wake, including electrons.
There may be infrequent occasions when short personal emails are allowed. Military comm channels are meant for official business and emergencies. Much depends on the mission.
Phone calls and texts. Not a lot of cell towers where they travel. Ditto non-military internet access for personal use. Personal phones are not allowed in or near many military spaces, for info security reasons.
Write letters, and number them on the outside so he knows in what order to open. They get delivered in bunches as that's how mail works with deployed vessels with infrequent opportunities to receive stuff. Those opportunities are called "Mail Drops." This is especially true for subs especially, which can remain submerged for long, long stretches of time. It's amazing how good a handful of real letters feels on deployment.
Be aware, too, that before military people go on deployment, that's what they start focusing on, getting into the 24/7 at sea mode, and beginning to separate from home routine. It's normal and natural. Being deployed at sea, especially subs, is a different, all-consuming, world.
My sympathies. Focus on being healthy, productive and as happy as you can be. See how you feel about this and how well you cope. People in healthy relationships with military have to be strong and independent. Have conversations about how best to communicate and show support when he is deployed.
If you know his sub name, and don't have address, Google USS "FISH" address. Look for navy.mil sources.
The envelope would be:
LT Salty Hatchcover, USN
USS FISH (SSN 123)
FPO AP, or AE or similar, ZIPCODE
If he is out for a short at-sea period, no mail may be planned at all. FPO = Fleet Post Office