R-Day Group Size

I was wondering if any current cadet, alumni, or parents have an opinion on how many people should accompany you or your new cadet during R-Day. From the information I have already received, I have not read of any max number of people. I would like to know if there are negatives to having more than just parents come.

R-Day is a VERY long, hot, and taxing day. A lot of waiting and walking in uncomfortable conditions. We only took immediate family. It worked out well. It could start as early as 0430 and won't end until 1930 or so. Your mind won't be on extended family or friends. In addition, remember, you will have one minute to say your goodbyes and give final hugs. Fastest 60 seconds ever... After that you won't see anyone until A-Day. Bear in mind these conditions would be hard on the very young or the very old.

Best of Luck!
Go Army!

coolmj14 said:

I was wondering if any current cadet, alumni, or parents have an opinion on how many people should accompany you or your new cadet during R-Day. From the information I have already received, I have not read of any max number of people. I would like to know if there are negatives to having more than just parents come.

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+1 @Walman888 - JMPO, but R-Day can be an anxious time for both the plebe and family. I would recommend to limit R-Day to just a small group (no more than parents and siblings) as there will be other opportunities for extended family to experience West Point.

There are no rules about how many people can/should come on Rday. Each family dynamic is different so there is no right or wrong answer. Decide on what you want - I am assuming that you are a cadet and not a parent.

It depends on how much you like the people =) For DS1, it was just me, his dad, and his little bro. When the little bro went 7 years later, it was me, his dad, his gf, and the gf's parents. We all loved being together and sightseeing all day. Both size groups worked for us. Had we had mobility challenged grands, it would have been a different story. Do what works for you, but know the lines are super, super long for some report times.

Really r day morning goes relatively quickly. A -day however is amazing and is truly the better experience for extended family. Outside of ring weekend- A Day was my favorite experience.

So, it depends on your family. I am all about treating R-Day like a championship playoff. Emotionally cool. Mentally focused--for your child's benefit. He or she will be nervous. Perhaps unable to sleep the night or two before R-Day. You likely will be cajoling your child to eat and drink water at 0500 (please, even pack a bar or two and a bottle of water int he event your wait is long to get into Ike--lunch is a long way away and they will need their strength.) Do you know that your child is likely to withdraw and get nervous as the big day approaches? He or she may become grumpy and irritable.

So, we are a small entourage family. It was only ever me with my cadet (I am a widow--but if my husband were alive, I suspect we both would have gone both times--but who knows. No doubt he was with us in spirit.) Itis an incredibly long day. You may stand in line for hours, then you have to entertain yourself for 8-10-12 hours waiting for the parade at the end of the day. You may not be ready to leave post until 7 p.m. (Bring sunscreen and a hat for yourself).

Also, after the drop off you do not spend time with your cadet again. You may or may not pick him or her out during the parade. (I am horrible at this--both of my kids look fairly generic.)

The emotional good byes should take place at home. NO EMOTIONAL SABOTAGE! No long love notes hidden in your child's bag. Just focus on the event. The Head in the Game. "I love you. They picked you. You've got this." If you can do that with both sets of grandparents and younger siblings in tow, go right ahead. Otherwise, keep it small and save the entourage for the VICTORY at A-Day where you can celebrate your child's success and welcome into the Corps.

I think the OP is a future cadet/cadet candidate...up to you--but you will be hyper-focused and out of there so fast with hardly a thought for the people who hug you goodbye. It goes very quickly. Please, eat something and drink a little water that morning. Don't be afraid to run to use the restroom while you are waiting in the line to get into Ike. You do not know when you will get your next opportunity. Also, do not run off with your sunglasses on top of your head.

Best wishes to all.

Best thing my wife did on R-Day was hold back on the tears until DS was out of Ike and on the bus. As stated above be strong for your cadet, it is already a highly stressful, nerve racking, emotional day for the cadets as they head off into the unknown. Do your best to use the 60 second goodbye to convey strength and confidence. Your cadet will thank you later..

Parent of 4 said:

Best thing my wife did on R-Day was hold back on the tears until DS was out of Ike and on the bus. As stated above be strong for your cadet, it is already a highly stressful, nerve racking, emotional day for the cadets as they head off into the unknown. Do your best to use the 60 second goodbye to convey strength and confidence. Your cadet will thank you later..

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Both Mom and I lost it in the Foyer outside of the IKE auditorium. Five minutes later it was fairly good again but I remember feeling numb for a half an hour or so. Oh, and the Foyer seemed full of sniffling folks. I was embarrassed until I looked around.