Going rate for Graduation cash?

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ProudDad2022

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Our plebe to be has a buddy graduating high school and we are invited to his graduation party. The wife and I are going back and forth on how much to give as a graduation gift. Any thoughts? For context, this is a friend that we first met when our son was a Sophomore. Our son is 1 year older and spent this past year at a prep school (Thank you USNA Foundation program) so, they didn't have any real life contact this year. Just social media stuff. Any thoughts?

***Sorry everyone. I should have titled the post "Going rate for High School Graduation cash?"
 
I think it’s going to vary a lot by location. Humey’s suggestion might be appropriate in his area, but if I gave one of my friend’s kids a graduation card with $100 in it they would be calling me to ask what is going on. $25 is probably the average in our community.

Stealth_81
 
DD has received between 50 and 300 so far...I just spent 300 on 2 pairs of custom fitted running shoes, so does that exempt me/DW from an additional cash gift?

Just kidding, I know I am on the hook for every thing, plus the graduation gift.

After all, she has saved me way more in tuition, books, room & board, etc. than I can possibly spend on anything else.

Now, if I can just get DD #2 to go the SA route...
 
Depends on how close you are to the grad as well. Someone on the same sports team does not rate the same as a kid who more or less grew up on your basement couch. So maybe $0 for a roster mate, $20 for a pal, and $100 for your fourth son...
 
Did your kid receive a gift from them when they graduated? If not I wouldn’t give anything. :biglaugh:
 
My wife just gives everyone a beach towel. She buys them on sale throughout the year. They seem to be appreciated and it's not the type of thing anyone will think of, while being something they can use in college.h
 
My eldest grandson graduates tonight. He's getting a card and a twenty dollar bill.
 
I remember getting a Webster's Collegiate Dictionary and a Cross Pen and Pencil Set...AND I LIKED THEM!

Edit: And my parents gave me an electric typewriter
 
My mother went back to grad school in her 50s to get a liberal arts masters degree. We were grown and out of the house by then so we had some fun with her graduation. My youngest brother gave her a schmaltzy card with a $50 in it, but I got her a schmaltzy card with a $20 because I'm a lot older. My dad offered her $100 to skip the open house. Hilarity ensued.
 
My son just had his party and got lots of 20-25$ gifts from general non-family and he was thrilled! I love the idea of $20.19. Family gave him 50-100$ and that was much appreciated.
 
Go4it said:
My son just had his party and got lots of 20-25$ gifts from general non-family and he was thrilled! I love the idea of $20.19. Family gave him 50-100$ and that was much appreciated.
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I know everyone does things differently and everyone has different financial situations, but if my family were to give my sons 50-100, my wife would be pissed
 
Humey said:
I know everyone does things differently and everyone has different financial situations, but if my family were to give my sons 50-100, my wife would be pissed
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I am perplexed by this. She would be mad because it was too much, or not enough?
I went to a graduation party last weekend for a guy who was a year behind my DS. I know him well enough to actually go to his party (and don't think he's a chucklehead, like most kids these days), so I gave him $50.
 
THParent said:
Humey said:
I know everyone does things differently and everyone has different financial situations, but if my family were to give my sons 50-100, my wife would be pissed
Click to expand...

I am perplexed by this. She would be mad because it was too much, or not enough?
I went to a graduation party last weekend for a guy who was a year behind my DS. I know him well enough to actually go to his party (and don't think he's a chucklehead, like most kids these days), so I gave him $50.
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50-10 from a family member would not be enough. Regarding the gift you gave, that was good amount. I figure like this. I wouldnt give someone a 20 because it isnt enough. That is barely enough for a movie ticket. 25 is a nice amount, but I am not going to give a a 20 and 5 dollar bill. Two 20 bills is decent but i dont like the idea of giving two bills. 50 is a nice amount and its a single bill. I wouldnt give 5 - 10 dollar bills. Now it all goes out the window if you are giving a check but anything under $40 with a check seems cheesey. Now It makes a difference if the person is a child, a young adult, high school\college graduate or adult, so i dont use the same rule for everyone.
 
Humey said:
50-10 from a family member would not be enough.
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I have family members who could easily afford way more than $50-100 and other family members who could not afford $50 without affecting their financial situation. No disrespect intended, but I don't understand the thought process behind getting mad at the gift amount.

Shouldn't the person giving the gift have the right to give what they feel is appropriate and within their means? There are so many factors that could affect a person's ability to give within any set one-size-fits-all guideline (number of graduates they wish to give to that year, income, debt, etc.) it seems that any set guidelines could not fit all situations. I would hate to see someone give me or my child a gift that put them in debt.

And shouldn't the person receiving the gift just be grateful for whatever amount they were given? After all, no one owes them a gift.
 
I find this thread fascinating and illuminating, since I admit to my knowledge of HS gift-giving being limited to my own 20th c. experience. When did it become such a cash grab? I got some cards from family and friends, and my parents bought me the calculator required for my college. No cash at all, and I had the usual range of lesser-to-better-off family.

I feel quite horrified now, as I have been writing warm notes (my best cursive! Waterman pen!) inside nice graduation cards upon receipt of graduation announcements, but not enclosing any cash or check. Guess I’ve earned curmudgeon points now.
 
Dadof2 said:
Humey said:
50-10 from a family member would not be enough.
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I have family members who could easily afford way more than $50-100 and other family members who could not afford $50 without affecting their financial situation. No disrespect intended, but I don't understand the thought process behind getting mad at the gift amount.

Shouldn't the person giving the gift have the right to give what they feel is appropriate and within their means? There are so many factors that could affect a person's ability to give within any set one-size-fits-all guideline (number of graduates they wish to give to that year, income, debt, etc.) it seems that any set guidelines could not fit all situations. I would hate to see someone give me or my child a gift that put them in debt.

And shouldn't the person receiving the gift just be grateful for whatever amount they were given? After all, no one owes them a gift.
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Well of course there are circumstances where family and or friends are limited because of economic problems. No one would expect them to give more than what they could afford or think was appropriate. So someone who was in bankruptcy would not be expected to give a monetary gift as their attendance to the party would be their gift. The idea of getting mad at family members was really more of a joke but its only intended only for family members who have the means to give more. In my family, most of my relatives make much more than I do so there isnt an issue there, but the reality is that gifts go both way. We have given them nice gifts for birthdays, Bar Mitzvahs and other ceremonies so there is an expectation that gifts to my children would be relatively equal to what we have given.
 
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