Anxiety medication

[utahmom13]

My daughter is interested in applying for a ROTC scholarship. However, she began treating with a doctor during COVID for anxiety/depression. She had been fine her whole life, but the separation from everyone and home schooling caused problems. She's an only child and used to be social and was home alone all the time. My husband and I recommended she see a counselor and then she got put on a minimum dose of anti-anxiety medication (actually half of what is normal as a trial period to see if it helped). She began treatment in May or so last year and still sees counselor so treatment was more than one year. She still had medicine, but doesn't really take it all the time as she said she doesn't notice a difference. The doctor said at this dose she might not even notice a difference, but just the act of taking the medication may be a help. In reading things, I believe this will cause her to be disqualified from ROTC. She is going to be a senior in high school. I am trying to search and get information. If she stopped the medication, is she disqualified forever from applying for a scholarship? Will this automatically disqualify her from applying for one in the fall? Forgive my ignorance on all of this. We are not a military family and I spent so much time looking into ROTC, but didn't even think about this part of things.

 

[justdoit19]

There will be a process she has to work through. There is a medical record now. She cannot just stop and not report. It’s beyond that. Idk what protocols are, but Mr Mullen will assist your daughter. He is THE person to work with her. So when he shows up with his offer of assistance, your DD should reach out to him and follow his guiadance.

As a mom, I can empathize with your concern. But know that you did the right thing. Last year was a hard year. And mental health was affected all over the place. Don’t second guess yourself.

One thing does stand out to me in your post. There will be times when she will be isolated and alone. If not literally, then figuratively. I would highly suggest she really spend time talking to those actually IN the military to see if it’s a good fit for her social needs. It’s not for everyone. That’s for sure.

 

[utahmom13]

Thanks for your response. I am devastated at a mom. I should clarify that she is fine with being alone, but it was just the entire world was tipped upside down. She is the top of her class and suddenly school went to online learning on a pass/fail basis. She has always been self sufficient. Works 2 jobs. Varsity sports, leadership. I wish I never gave her the advice to seek help. She has talked to people and really loves all the leadership skills etc and military can give her. She works better at being busy and I think that is where the COVID problem started because there was really nothing going on. No requirement to study, sports, etc.

I do love any advice that anyone can give me.

 

[justdoit19]

Well, don’t beat yourself up. There are people who didn’t receive advice from ther moms, who struggled silently, and ultimately ended their earthly suffering. Hindsight is great, but you also have to do the best that you can, in the moment.

Y’all will at least have knowledge through information, and can figure out a plan.

Hugs to you momma! Doing things for our children, from a place of love is never wrong.

 

[USAFAGradMom]

Well, don’t beat yourself up. There are people who didn’t receive advice from ther moms, who struggled silently, and ultimately ended their earthly suffering. Hindsight is great, but you also have to do the best that you can, in the moment.

Y’all will at least have knowledge through information, and can figure out a plan.

Hugs to you momma! Doing things for our children, from a place of love is never wrong.

Agree with justdoit19... your DD's mental health & keeping her safe is a much higher priority than getting into the military

 

[Thunderbolt462]

My daughter is interested in applying for a ROTC scholarship. However, she began treating with a doctor during COVID for anxiety/depression. She had been fine her whole life, but the separation from everyone and home schooling caused problems. She's an only child and used to be social and was home alone all the time. My husband and I recommended she see a counselor and then she got put on a minimum dose of anti-anxiety medication (actually half of what is normal as a trial period to see if it helped). She began treatment in May or so last year and still sees counselor so treatment was more than one year. She still had medicine, but doesn't really take it all the time as she said she doesn't notice a difference. The doctor said at this dose she might not even notice a difference, but just the act of taking the medication may be a help. In reading things, I believe this will cause her to be disqualified from ROTC. She is going to be a senior in high school. I am trying to search and get information. If she stopped the medication, is she disqualified forever from applying for a scholarship? Will this automatically disqualify her from applying for one in the fall? Forgive my ignorance on all of this. We are not a military family and I spent so much time looking into ROTC, but didn't even think about this part of things.

Disqualified forever? No. Disqualified for the immediate future? More than likely. Only DoDMERB can make the final determination, but she's probably going to need some time off the meds to prove she's good to go, and by that point she may be out of college already and need to apply for OTS or OCS instead. Also, with a history of anti-anxiety med use, she'll probably be prevented from aviation or special operations jobs, but most other jobs shouldn't be an issue.

As everyone on this forum says, there's nothing more important than your mental health. Even folks with no issues find themselves seeking help once they start their military careers.

I'd encourage your daughter to join ROTC, with the expectation that she may be disqualified, but at least she'll get a glimpse if the military is a good fit for her. You can join without a scholarship and even apply for one with an impending disqualification. The medical exam is given separately and must be passed before the scholarship is activated, however.

Finally, some advice for you as a parent. As much as it hurts to see your daughter be deemed not qualified at the moment, it's truly for her own good. Military service can take a MASSIVE toll on someone's mental health, and it's ok to not be ready for that just yet. I personally am encouraged with the direction the military is headed in terms of mental health treatment, so I don't think it's the end of the road for her when it comes to joining at a later date.

 

[Thunderbolt462]

Thanks for your response. I am devastated at a mom. I should clarify that she is fine with being alone, but it was just the entire world was tipped upside down. She is the top of her class and suddenly school went to online learning on a pass/fail basis. She has always been self sufficient. Works 2 jobs. Varsity sports, leadership. I wish I never gave her the advice to seek help. She has talked to people and really loves all the leadership skills etc and military can give her. She works better at being busy and I think that is where the COVID problem started because there was really nothing going on. No requirement to study, sports, etc.

I do love any advice that anyone can give me.

You made the right call. My mom made sure I knew to get help if any mental health issues ever manifested themselves due to a family history. Sure enough, they began to pop up on active duty as a result of some external factors and a stressful training course, and because I knew to get help from our talks, I was able to get them sorted out quickly and without an impact on my career. Short term it's unfortunate, but long term it may very well pay off.

 

[MullenLE]

MOM: Google "DoDMERB;" Hit "Questions on the process;" Read paragraph #4.

DAUGHTER: Send me an email: lawrence.e.mullen.civ@mail.mil; provide complete name and last 4 SSN; provide the text of your Parent's posting above to YOUR email. The subject line of the email should be “utahmom13 - SAF = ANXIETY MEDICATION.“ Do NOT embed links in your email as I will not be able to view those.