Dad Joke thread (everybody welcome)

Can't tell you how many times I have seen the Cummerbund worn with the pleats down. ;)
 
A bank robber pulls out gun points it at the teller, and says, "Give me all the money or you're geography!" The puzzled teller replies, "Did you mean to say 'or you're history?'" The robber says, "Don't change the subject!"
 
justme said:
I've seen a similar gourmet meal made from a salted legume puree paired with a concord grape reduction on a decrusted brioche bun.
Click to expand...
I think that's very popular with the young crowd throughout the ages. :D
 
I told my boss three companies were after me and I needed a raise to stay at my job. We haggled for a few minutes, and he gave me a 5% raise.

Leaving his office, he stopped and asked me, "By the way, which companies are after you?" I responded, "The gas, electric, and cable company."
 
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