mbitr said:
I'm not saying his dismissal was over the line. I'm saying the kid shouldn't beat himself up too bad over it. The rules at the academies are very strict and really have more in common with the 19th century service and the 21st. He disobeyed a general order and was rightfully dismissed, but that doesn't mean we can't question whether or not creating an environment that really isn't comparable to life in the modern military produces better officers.
If I am correct you are not an ADAF officer. As a frequent ROTC poster, I believe you are AROTC, not even AFROTC. Army world AD and AF world AD are not the same. You can't place a blanket statement that all AD military branches are the same. I.E. AF PT is golfing without a cart! AF builds the runway 1st, O Club 2nd, Golf course 3rd.
5 yrs ago, our squadron commander (O5 up for O6) found himself in an awkward sexual situation on a Sat. night in his car...nothing illegal, except the fact he was married, and it wasn't his wife in this situation.
Monday morning there was a new commander, by Friday they were moved out of his on base house, and he was reporting 7 days later to a new base. Needless to say he wasn't picked up for O6.
That is the modern military. I don't know why you assume in the AF that there are different standards. He wasn't the 1st commander that lost their job over extra-marital affairs. I can count on my fingers and toes, plus some of Bullets phalanges too the amount of officers that were given the door because of pushing the envelope regarding personal sexual relations, and I am not talking homosexual.
Seriously, can you say Petraeus! The guys career ended because of a personal relationship. It was an affair. She did not work for him. Apple wouldn't care, but when you have a TS clearance, they care. Have you filled out TS clearance paperwork yet? Trust me, it goes back to the day you were born. OP's DS had a UPT slot, he has a TS clearance. They interview people before signing off. Just like Petraeus, they care about their personal life.
It is real life, and if you think that sexual relationships in the ADAF don't matter at all, I have a bridge to sell you in Brooklyn. Titling it to you might be an issue, but trust me, I can get it for you. Believe that, and I have another piece of property to sell you in FL., it is a little swampy, but trust me.
Welcome to the real military mbitr.
It is ironic regarding your post. Many posters desire to go SA to live the AD life. Your position is the AD life is not like the SA world. I totally disagree. Our DS is at UPT right now, living in the Q's, paying for it (BAH). Guess what? He had to acknowledge and give permission for unannounced room inspections. He is an ADAF O1.
He didn't have that when he lived in his college dorms as an AFROTC cadet.
Live in AF base housing, they can leave you nasty grams for your lawn. Multiple nasty grams and the commander is informed.
That is the real AF military. Sorry to burst your bubble.
It also explains why many ADAF members move off base as soon as they can.
IMPO, this was not about a tie, or a class being missed. It was about the GF.
If I was to be brutally honest, I wonder why on earth they did this. I can't see how any C1C would risk this their last semester, unless they wanted out. As others have stated this issue has always been addressed multiple times every yr. He know the huge risk he was undertaking the moment they slid under the sheets. He had 3 1/2 yrs of being warned. He gets a monthly stipend, enough to pay out of pocket for a hotel. As a C1C he probably had a car too, to drive an "visit" her at the hotel for a couple of hrs.
Sorry, bigdog, but that is the question in my mind. Also, sorry, but as an AF wife of 21 yrs, and a Mom of an O1, with a GF that I expect to be our Daughter In law, I would have issues with her decision too. In every relationship, someone has to be the sound voice.
Had to say it, not from a judging factor, but from a Mom factor. IMPHO, she is also culpable for his diis-enrollment. I would want to know why she risked it all. You don't need to be a rocket scientist to see this is not allowed at the AFA. She risked his career too. JMPO.