Girlfriend coming to Plebe Parents' Weekend?

Since you asked, I’d forget about bringing the GF. Use the weekend to honor and thank your parents for getting you to where you are. Your focus needs to be on what lies ahead, not on worrying about a relationship that has very little chance of lasting your academy career.
 
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We brought our '14 grads GF to his parents weekend and it made my son very happy. We all pretty much hung out in the room, he slept a ton, but was very happy to have his GF there. If YOU want her there, and its important to YOU, then discuss with your parents your wishes.
 
The last thing you should do with a DS/DD is to dictate when the significant other can and can’t visit. Yeah, you might have to share time with them but get over it. The relationship probably won’t last but don’t be the reason it doesn’t.
Make sure during these times that they know there are some things you would like to see, certain events when you would like them to be there with you. However give them time to grow in their relationships and find out if this other person is someone who should be part of their life, or if they have gone different directions and need to part ways. It’s time to let your children become adults.
 
+1 to UHBlackhawk

Factor in the Plebe can’t go anywhere in the car with her, because he is not allowed to drive on liberty, nor ride in a POV with anyone other than a parent, commissioned officer, sponsor or 1/c in certain circumstances. He’ll be in uniform; she can take his arm but that’s it in public.

Lots of good input here. It’s for your family to work out.
 
Last year for PPW, my husband could not attend and (after I made sure DS wanted GF), I Invited her to go with me (we flew from California). It also happened that a friend of mine from NY came to stay too. That eliminated the "third wheel" potential. GF stayed in our Airbnb and we brought DS there any time he could be off the yard. GF knew he'd be dead tired and had no unreal expectations. They rested on the sofa with her rubbing his bald head! She wrote him more than I did that summer and is truly supportive. She kept a journal at home for him..wrote every day and they read it together. In my head, she is potentially my future DIL and possibly the mother of my grandkids. If it doesn't work out for them, neither of them will be able to blame me. It helps that I love this girl, and truly hope they make to the 2% club! Just my 2 cents.
 
Thanks a lot, you jerks!
I hadn't even considered that this may be a possibility, until I read this danged thread.

*smacks forehead with hand*
 
The only thing going through my mind on this subject is that I wish I had a crystal ball to help decide what housing to book for the weekend :) We are a big family, the addition of the gf, if he wants her to come, does have an effect on where we book. Oh well!!

We told DS at the beginning of this journey, that we would support HIM in any way we could. If he would like her there, we will bring her along. This is his time to shine and grow and turn into a man, I’m not dictating what happens anymore. I respect his decisions and choices...still will opine, but that it.

So proud of all these fine young men and women. Will be so amazing to watch them grow and fly!!
 
justdoit19 said:
The only thing going through my mind on this subject is that I wish I had a crystal ball to help decide what housing to book for the weekend :) We are a big family, the addition of the gf, if he wants her to come, does have an effect on where we book. Oh well!!

We told DS at the beginning of this journey, that we would support HIM in any way we could. If he would like her there, we will bring her along. This is his time to shine and grow and turn into a man, I’m not dictating what happens anymore. I respect his decisions and choices...still will opine, but that it.

So proud of all these fine young men and women. Will be so amazing to watch them grow and fly!!
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There are many, many threads on this. Much depends on a plebe’s personality and how he or she likes to recharge and relax.

A plebe may well just want to get out of uniform, hang in a cool hotel room, take long showers, nap, catch up on social media, nap, eat favorite foods, nap. Have quiet time with just a few people who aren’t asking him questions. Most plebes will not want to go back on the Yard for any reason, unless they have to, so touring family around, in uniform, in Annapolis or DC, on a hot August weekend, is not the mental break they want or need.

Also be open to any “orphan” plebes whose families are unable to come. There are wonderful stories of these plebes being folded up into a classmate’s family for an escape from the Yard.

Annapolis Accommodations and AirBnB are both good options to book a place to accommodate the family. You can get breakfast things in, cook favorite meals, have snacks, have room to spread out, do emergency laundry (white uniforms!) - and not compete with 1000+ other plebe families going out for breakfast, lunch and dinner in a small town. There are many options in Annapolis within walking distance of the Yard or a quick drive, or big homes on the water complete with water toys and outdoor kitchens.
 
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HuskyPilot said:
Since you asked, I’d forget about bringing the GF. Use the weekend to honor and thank your parents for getting you to where you are. Your focus needs to be on what lies ahead, not on worrying about a relationship that has very little chance of lasting your academy career.
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Tough news. You were thoughtful in thinking this far ahead about including her and how that might balance with family.

Now, you can focus on finishing the year strong, “just doing you,” PT, enjoying yourself.

Your life as you know it will never be the same after I-Day - that includes a whole new range of people to meet and develop new friendships and relationships. Ms. Exactly Right and all her Almost Right precursors are waiting for you. [emoji16]
 
rock_on_USNA2022 said:
Well, thanks for the responses, but she broke up with me the day after I started this thread! Damn, life is hard sometimes.
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That's okay. You can always find a shiny new one.
As @Capt MJ (above) says, "Ms. Exactly Right and all her Almost Right precursors are waiting for you."
And probably a Ms. Wrong or two.
 
rock_on_USNA2022 said:
Well, thanks for the responses, but she broke up with me the day after I started this thread! Damn, life is hard sometimes.
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I know it's hard news, but it is also pretty normal at this point in your life when one, or both, of you are bound for college. Another time it is common is at the end of, or right after, college. DS's girlfriend broke up with him about 6 months after he went active and was attending TBS. You'll get through it quick enough.
 
Capt MJ said:
There are many, many threads on this. Much depends on a plebe’s personality and how he or she likes to recharge and relax.

A plebe may well just want to get out of uniform, hang in a cool hotel room, take long showers, nap, catch up on social media, nap, eat favorite foods, nap. Have quiet time with just a few people who aren’t asking him questions. Most plebes will not want to go back on the Yard for any reason, unless they have to, so touring family around, in uniform, in Annapolis or DC, on a hot August weekend, is not the mental break they want or need.

Also be open to any “orphan” plebes whose families are unable to come. There are wonderful stories of these plebes being folded up into a classmate’s family for an escape from the Yard.

Annapolis Accommodations and AirBnB are both good options to book a place to accommodate the family. You can get breakfast things in, cook favorite meals, have snacks, have room to spread out, do emergency laundry (white uniforms!) - and not compete with 1000+ other plebe families going out for breakfast, lunch and dinner in a small town. There are many options in Annapolis within walking distance of the Yard or a quick drive, or big homes on the water complete with water toys and outdoor kitchens.
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Can you recommend communities to look into? We are interested in water access...coming from the Midwest, never been out east, think this might best suit our desires.

I can find the home, the part I am having difficulty with is local input as to what of the many communities to search, that aren’t right on the bay ($$$), and are a “do-able” commute.
 
justdoit19 said:
Can you recommend communities to look into? We are interested in water access...coming from the Midwest, never been out east, think this might best suit our desires.

I can find the home, the part I am having difficulty with is local input as to what of the many communities to search, that aren’t right on the bay ($$$), and are a “do-able” commute.
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Call Annapolis Accommodations. They are local in Annapolis, have been handling USNA Comm Weeks, I-Days, 2/c Parents Weekends, PPWs, for years. They know the neighborhoods, communities and properties - close in for walking, parking, how many to sleep, outdoor grill, water access, pool, commute time to Yard, etc. They have been working with slightly anxious plebe parents for a long time.

There is A LOT of water in Annapolis. The Severn, Magothy and South Rivers all flow into the Bay within a few miles of each other, with endless inlets, creeks, peninsulas, shoreline. There is Annapolis, but also Arnold, Severna Park, Pasadena, Crownsville, Edgewater, and Riva, as the closest adjacent waterfront communities where people who work in Annapolis live. I live just outside Annapolis city limits, 8 miles from Gate 8 at USNA, in a water-privileged community. We have our own community waterfront dock, slips and boat/kayak/SeaDoo launch area, but no homes on the waterfront.
 
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rock_on_USNA2022 said:
Well, thanks for the responses, but she broke up with me the day after I started this thread! Damn, life is hard sometimes.
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Well that sucks. As I tell my DS when this stuff happens . . .You are allowed to feel sorry for yourself for (insert time here. Usually 24 hours, depending on the situation). After that, I expect you to pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and move on.

True story . . . I have a friend who's son received an offer to USNA. He turned it down because he didn't want to be away from his girlfriend. They broke up just before his freshman year at the local (not as prestigious as USNA) college.
 
The "Maritime Republic of Eastport" is a cool place to visit (and read about its founding on Super Bowl Sunday 1998).
They are the 2017 defending champions of the annual (1st week of November) tug-of-war (the slaughter across the water) with Annapolis, and they don't take themselves too seriously.

The MRE flag features two retrievers, a heron and a crab, and every Spring there is a "burning of the socks" to celebrate the equinox and call the official start of the sailing season. That will be next Tuesday!
 
THParent said:
The "Maritime Republic of Eastport" is a cool place to visit (and read about its founding on Super Bowl Sunday 1998).
They are the 2017 defending champions of the annual (1st week of November) tug-of-war (the slaughter across the water) with Annapolis, and they don't take themselves too seriously.

The MRE flag features two retrievers, a heron and a crab, and every Spring there is a "burning of the socks" to celebrate the equinox and call the official start of the sailing season. That will be next Tuesday!
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How about the .05k Bridge Run? Exhausting.
 
SAMom said:
For what it’s worth I allowed my son to have his gf there for PPW. All I wanted was to see him happy. Fast forward 4 years he commissions in May and the Wedding is in June!!
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That's awesome! Congrats!

FWIW, Most high school relationships will not make it through college, even if they decide to go to the same school. You have to support each other, and, if a boyfriend or girlfriend doesn't want what is best for you, that relationship will not last. You can't go through life with "I gave up the Academy for her" hanging over your heads. It just won't work.
 
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