@KeyzCat, I think what Blessedmom is trying to explain is that most varsity sports are far more time and energy consuming than what you've described about your son's golf team. Like Blessedmom, my swimmer has practice 5 days a week for 2 hours, plus swim meets. Track season is the same in spring. Boxing is year round, practice 3 nights a week - on top of swim or track. On top of that, she meets with a military fitness training group before school 3 days a week and on Saturdays.
I think what a few others have suggested is that perhaps your son is lacking in physical fitness. I don't see in any of your posts what his PFT scores were, and if he did great on the PFT then that's fabulous - but it could also be that it is the athleticism that he needs to work on. I mean absolutely no disrespect, simply pointing out what I see possibly lacking.
I do appreciate your service to our country. However, I disagree that your service should count towards your offspring. Service academy or ROTC is based on the candidates resumes, not on what his/her parents did however many years ago. There is the GI Bill that can be used to send your child to college, if you did not use the funds for yourself - have you looked into that?
Most kids are different from their parents, simply because they are their own unique person. Heck, while my own kids share some of my traits not one of them is exactly like me (for which I'm grateful, haha).
You must also consider his desired major of psychology. I cannot speak to the needs of the military, but a psychologist is a job that likely has far less slots available to commission than anything else. I'm guessing that a ROTC scholarship for psychology major would be extremely competitive, simply because there are less slots to fill.
Lastly, as a mom I have to ask - what is the rush to get your kid in college so fast??? Does he truly want to go into the military now, or could you perhaps be pushing him?
If you wait until next year, he can work on anything at all that needs improvement and then apply to a service academy. Why not just wait a year???
Your son has a good resume, and he should be proud of all that he has accomplished so far. It sounds like he's just too young yet. My daughter has a July birthday, she was notified in April that she was an Official Candidate to USNA.....and she couldn't log on to the portal until after she turned 17 months later. The wait was excruciating!!!
I understand that it can be very hard to watch your son work so hard for years and then be told to just wait longer, but it just might be the best thing for him. Why settle for EC or JMC, why try to scramble together scholarships, ROTC, etc and pick schools that are less than his first choice.......when in just 10 months he could apply to a service academy, which you said had been his dream? Why give up that dream to get him into the military at age 16?
I wish you nothing but the best, and I hope all your son's dreams may come true.