Nelson,
I am glad you have re-read the posts and understand we came from a place of good intentions.
Now, let me say this to all posters/lurkers.
ROTC units are tight knit. They are a community upon themselves. No cadet (GMC or POC) will give a rat's behind if you are on scholarship when it comes to reviewing your abilities against other cadets/mids.
Scholarship cadets are not treated like the "golden child" because they were awarded a scholarship. Many do succeed because that scholarship is the monkey on their back. They know if they don't have X.YZ gpa it can be pulled and not only do they lose a military career, but because they could only afford to attend the school on scholarship, they lose their college education.
~~~That fear motivates them to be the best.
Nobody discusses which cadet is on scholarship and which isn't regarding performance. It is not an ROTC issue.
That being said, the fact is most likely your name will be discussed early on. Reason why is because the command will know 60 days prior to entering college, you smoked Pot, knowing you were going ROTC. They will keep an eye on you, because now you are tied to their careers. Cadets getting caught smoking Pot will be a part of their AD OPR (Officer Promotion Review) or PRF (Performance Review File). That is a part of their military record, and they are not going to take a bullet for you.
In the AFROTC system the CC(Company Commander ---AD O6) will tell the CCC (Cadet Company Commander ---ROTC SR), who will inform his FCC (Flight Cadet Commander) to watch you for any signs of trouble. This will occur in a meeting and gossip does tend to follow, although it shouldn't, it does.
So honestly, yes, you will initially be that guy. It is now up to you to prove you AREN'T that guy. You will need to prove yourself to them that it was the dumbest thing you ever did.
As I said before, for most ROTC units they deal with underage drinking on campus. They understand peer pressure. For you, they already know you "folded" regarding peer pressure and smoke Pot, now they need to make sure you don't fold on the more common issue at college...underage drinking. I have to say the "17 yo smoking pot is common" was your way of defending yourself. My kids didn't...trust parents, we were 17 too, and Pot has a distinct odor, so do the glassy eyes and the foolish behavior while you decide to eat a gallon of ice cream. We are not dumb. The only thing I would agree with you on, is that some 17 yo's smoked Pot, but ALL of their parents knew they did!
Anyone here who is either a cadet, or a parent of one can tell you that both issues will appear at your feet within days if not weeks of entering college. ROTC Commanders were college kids too, just like your folks, just like us. They are not going to place their cranium in the sand and say it doesn't exist. The difference is your folks will still love you, they are not your folks.
Walk in and be prepared to live under a microscope until you prove to them that you are worthy.
If you were my child this is what I would tell you:
Make an appointment with the CC and CCC day one.
Discuss this with them. They will respect your honesty and the trust issue will be easier to overcome.
If it is true you have ADD and were medically DQ from DodMERB. Get that on the table now.
~~~They are AD, they can work the system with you to get a waiver. Hiding it from them creates:
~Trust issue
~Spinning your wheels because DoDMERB will be an issue prior to commissioning....putting you behind the 8 ball.
They need to be "clued in" if you want to become an officer in the military. If I am correct you are AROTC, pm Marist or Clarkson on how to approach this with the unit. They are AD AROTC, they are the only 2 posters I would say LISTEN TO regarding directions. The rest of us are just giving opinions from the outside, including me. Doesn't mean that the outsiders are wrong, just means that if the 2 of them have a consensus on how to move forward for you that you should use their knowledge.
If you don't know either. Here are their latest posts, hit their name and you can pm them.
Marist College ROTC :
http://www.serviceacademyforums.com/showthread.php?p=204159#post204159
Clarksonarmy :
http://www.serviceacademyforums.com/showthread.php?t=21280
Good luck.