Bullet
10-Year Member
- Joined
- Jan 9, 2008
- Messages
- 986
Tower: "Bravo-one-9er, bear to the left, disabled aircraft on the right."
Pilot: "Bravo-one-9er, Roger, have the disabled aircraft in sight, but I don't see the bear yet."
Well, if we're going go off the beaten track, might as well go all out. Funny story time!.....
Working in the Tower one day at Elemendorf AFB (next to Anchorage Alaska) as the Ops Supervisor of Flying (SOF, shared duty amongst the Wing's experienced ops guys, works in the tower directing daily flight ops; sort of like the Air Boss on a carrier)
At the time, Elmendorf had one of the AF's most aggressive Anti-Bird operations being enforced (it was only a few months earlier that an AWACS crashed after take-off when it ingested a couple of dozen of Canadian snow geese). Air cannons, guys on ATVs shooting at the birds, THE WORKS. We also placed stuffed wolves and other animals all around the runway. Real wolves and moose and things like that, acting as "scarecrows".
Well, I'm up in the tower when I get this call from a guy taxing back to the chocks by his squadron:
Callsign Hidden To Protect Their Dignity (CHTPTD): "SOF, we're stopping here on Taxiway F. We got a wolf right next to the taxiway"
Me (knowing EXACTLY what they are talking about, and trying my best NOT to laugh as I answer their call): "Copy. Hold position. What's the wolf doing now?"
CHTPTD: "Well, it's just standing there, staring at us. You'd think the noise would have spooked it away by now"
ME, shedding tears from laughing so hard, but keeping up the game because I know it will make a GREAT story for Friday at the bar: "Copy that. Hold your position, we'll send out a truck to scare it away"
So he stays put. The tower crew is HOWLING by now. They're calling their friends on the phone, passing "You Can't BELIEVE what is going on out here now!". I get a call from the Ops Group CC (an O-6), who heard a rumor there was an "issue" on the flightline. Between giggles, I explain what is going on. He starts howling in laughter as well, and immediately runs to his truck so he can get to the jet so he can see this fiasco for himself.
ng
About 5 minutes pass. Meanwhile, all the other aircraft have taxied up behind the "scared of a stuffed wolf" crew and hold position, enjoying the show. A crew chief van finally pulls up. The NCO in charge JUMPS out of the truck, and starts doing a low-crawl towards the stuffed wolf, giving the crew a "I'm gonna Git 'im" thumbs up when he's half-way there. Finally, when he gets about 10 feet from the "dangerous animal", he jumps up and TACKLES the stuffed wolf, wrestling it to the ground. He then PICKS UP the stuffed wolf, places it under his arm, and walks back to the van. Before he gets there, he salutes the Now-Totally-Embarrassed crew of CHTPTD.
Friday at the bar passing THAT story was a HOOT, and won me the coveted "Best Story of the Week" award.
No S@#t, true story (at least 10% true....)