Telling parents...

Discussion in 'Naval Academy - USNA' started by vtusnahopeful, Feb 9, 2014.

  1. vtusnahopeful

    vtusnahopeful Member

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    I am in a weird spot right now because I don't know how to tell my parents I am interested in attending USNA. I have an older brother who is currently a plebe and a twin brother who has his sights set on the academy too. When we went to USNA during PPW, people asked me if I was interested in the academy, and without really thinking, I said "no way." After going home, I researched the academy a bit, and the basketball team, and realized that the academy seems like the perfect place for me. After looking around at other colleges, I have found that I can not picture myself at any other college but USNA. Only being a sophomore in high school, I know I still have some time, but there is a lot of preparation needed, and I feel like the earlier I tell my parents the better. How should I go about telling my parents? They would never have guessed that I would be interested in the academy so i know they will be very surprised. Thanks!
     
  2. ca2midwestmom

    ca2midwestmom Member

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    Have your parents made you feel that USNA is not for females? (Your first post in November indicates you are female.) Having an older brother already at USNA and a twin who is interested, I would think they'd be thrilled, but maybe there's more you aren't telling us. I can think of a dozen harder/more uncomfortable topics to bring up with parents. I think you present your interests (basketball, military branch, etc) and options and go from there. Plus you have another year of prep work to do to be competitive; hopefully your brothers are on your side and can give you support.
     
  3. Classof2018

    Classof2018 Member

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    A few years ago I found myself in a similar spot. I never thought of even considering USNA, but after a little bit of research and talking to some grads and people who were at the academy, I fell in love. I just flat out told my mom I wanted to go, and since I already had conversations with her about joining the military, she wasn't terribly surprised.

    I don't know if you planned on going into the military or not, but, I found it easier to just straight up tell my parents. Applying to USNA is nothing to be ashamed of, be proud of your decision!
     
  4. usnahopeful19

    usnahopeful19 Member

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    Just let them know exactly what you said here. Tell them that you hadn't thought anything of it before, but once you researched it you liked what you saw and could see yourself attending and excelling.
    Best of luck!
     
  5. vtusnahopeful

    vtusnahopeful Member

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    I don't think my parents feel like the academy is a bad place for females, but I think they thought I would never be interested in the academy. Growing up, my brothers were always reading books about the military and knew everything about the military. I never read any books like them, but I have always wanted to serve others. I also plan on playing basketball in college, and living in New England, a lot of people think of the NESCACs and D3 schools for basketball. My parents have been talking a lot about me going to a NESCAC school, but I would rather play for Navy than any of those schools. The pride in wearing the jersey and representing the US is more important to me than going to a school just for basketball.
    My brothers would be just as surprised as my parents. I think they might also try and talk me out of it, especially my twin. My brother who is at the academy now has given my twin a lot of Navy clothing, books, and items and hasn't given me anything. He would be very surprised to hear that I wanted to go to USNA.
    This summer, I plan on going to the Navy Basketball Camp, and one of my plans was to attend that and afterwards tell my parents I had a blast and want to go to Navy. That seems like the easiest way, but I am not sure how they would view it.
     
  6. flightsurgeon

    flightsurgeon Member

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    Hey there! I too am interested in the academy :)
    Normally, telling your parents would probably be the most difficult part of the process (that is, if they are against the military idea); however, from what you are saying, you have a brother who is a midshipman, and other siblings interested, I cannot imagine your parents to have any other reaction but be completely happy with your decision! Keep your head up and good luck!
     
  7. grevar

    grevar CGA Admissions Partner

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    There are other service academy options out there as well that you should at least consider taking a look at.
     
  8. JMS

    JMS Member

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    As a parent, I suggest that the way to tell your parents is today over dinner, say "ya know, I've been looking at the Navy and their basketball team and I'm thinking that might be a good place for me."
    In fact, don't even wait for dinner.
    Your parents will see this as good, if surprising, news.
    Now, I wonder from your post if your interest is the Naval Academy and its basketball team, or is it becoming a naval officer? Give some thought to the longer view and what you hope to be doing after college.
    Don't stop considering other schools because not everyone gets in and you may need a plan B.
     
  9. vtusnahopeful

    vtusnahopeful Member

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    I am aware that I will need other plans, but I would really like to serve my country upon graduation. The reason I bring up basketball is because I would like to continue to play basketball in college, and so I am looking for a team that is motivated and determined, and that is Navy Basketball. I like the idea over dinner, but I am waiting for when they ask about college because they will find it very out of the blue. I was thinking of making a powerpoint addressing why I want to go to the Naval Academy and showing it to them. Is that a good idea?
     
  10. jbsail

    jbsail Member

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    I'd go with throwing it at em at dinner or breakfast. You them at the table for a while. Definitely not a powerpoint for now. If you get in, from the start you will need to know how to talk something out. :shake:

    Break it to them that you are considering college after hs grad and among those you looked at on the internet or friends is - USNA (and throw in any other schools too). Throw in that you looked at jobs (Navy, add other branches if so) afterward too and may consider xxx.

    Oh yeah, def tell em before the bball camp. This weekend is good time to tell em.

    Good luck!
     
  11. AcademyFriend1

    AcademyFriend1 Member

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    Hello! A couple of responses to you.

    First, if you pursue an appointment you will have to get used to explaining to many people why you are interested in the Naval Academy (adults at your school; Blue and Gold Officer; people involved in helping select who gets Senatorial and Congressional nominations). No time like the present to start! I would not anticipate opposition from your parents, so no need to seem defensive (which putting together a PowerPoint would do) at this point. When you get a chance -- whether it's talking about your brother the plebe, or summer plans -- you can just say, "you know, I'm excited to be going to basketball camp at Navy this summer as I've started to be very interested in possibly attending the Academy. I want to use my time at basketball camp to learn more about Navy and the basketball program."

    Second, is there a possibility that your parents are invested in the basketball and feel like your best chance to play in college is at the Division III level? Navy is a Division I team so the level of play is a significant notch up from Division III. In terms of your own interest in Navy basketball, look up the women's team in the press guide and see what the players' backgrounds are -- what AAU teams, what level of awards in high school. Could you see yourself on a trajectory like that? Attending the camp this summer is another way to perhaps garner some interest from the Navy coach, and also perhaps to see if you think you project out at that level of talent. You can also talk to your high school or AAU coach to see what they think (generally the high school coaches are a little bit more honest about their appraisal, but many AAU coaches will also give you the straight scoop).

    If Navy basketball is not in the cards -- or it will be a long shot -- then you'll have to decide whether you prefer USNA without basketball or another school, like a NESCAC school, with basketball (if you have that option). And that will be a decision you will want to talk about with your parents, particularly if they are very involved in helping you with your basketball dreams.
     
  12. cajost

    cajost Member

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    As a parent, you'd be amazed at what already know. You will probably not shock them as much as you think.

    It isn't like you are telling them you committed murder or something. Just tell them...:thumb:
     
  13. NavyHoops

    NavyHoops Moderator

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    Just tell them. They obviously know the process having been through it with one child. They probably have encouraged the other routes because they thought that is what interested you. Tell them you want to attend basketball camp as it will help get you familiar with USNA and the basketball program. As a former basketball player at Navy, I can tell you that Navy basketball is leaps and bounds different than a DIII program. Most DIII coaches get paid very little and have tons of other collateral jobs not tied to coaching, but in the sports department to make up some of the pay. At the DI level, coaches feed their families based upon a bunch of 18-22 year olds playing a sport at a high level. The time commitment is enormous. Navy's program has made it to the NCAA tourney the last three years after winning the Patriot League titles. Navy isn't UConn, but they are making a name for themselves at the mid-major level and having a great run. You really know if you are good enough to play at Navy, make sure to give that an honest assessment. Are you prepared to go all in at Navy and not play basketball also? You are probably a pretty good athlete, other options like crew, rugby, etc that take a lot of walk ons.
     

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