Good afternoon, I'm currently a rising junior in high school with ambition to attend the USNA Class of 2029. I would be very grateful if you could take the time to review my essay I'm writing. I know its very early to be writing an essay - but I want to get someone's opinion on it. My essay is above 500 words but I will fix that after I make adjustments and finalize it.
Thank you!
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I've wanted to become a leader of this country for as long as I can remember. My uncle SGT Abdelaziz instilled into my mind at a very young age a leader-like mindset which he passed on to my brother who is currently attending USNA. I vividly remember times when my uncle would make me run up hills as he trailed behind me in his truck, disciplining me while teaching me life lessons that will stick with me for the rest of my life. I've visited USNA multiple times and It's more than just free college and some service years in my eyes, it's the breeding grounds for my future growth as a individual and as a leader of this nation. My brother is one of my biggest role models/motivators in becoming a leader of this nation, whether it being a commissioned officer, leader of a club, or simply being a leader in my family. We both grew up in town-houses with our mother and step-dad living pay-check to pay-check, Yet we would never let those circumstances hold us and my brother pushed me and continues to push me to be a better man and lead by example to this day even with him far away from home at Annapolis. I grew up skinny, weak, and addicted to video games. All through-out elementary and middle school I was seen as the "skinny weird kid". My brother would always subtly tell me I need to change, but it wasn't until I followed his actions that I became a different man. I strongly believe with all my heart that to be a good leader, you must be a good follower - This is something my JROTC instructors would always preach to me. My brother started wrestling during his high school years and as I looked up to him greatly, I took on wrestling as well. I began practicing, and in my first wrestling match I lost in front of my brother, coaches, and friends - This broke me. I cried after the match until I manned up and realized there's no one to blame but myself - That's how it is in the sport of wrestling as well as in life. I replayed the video in my room at least 10 times, rewinding back to the exact point where I see I gave up mentally, and made a vow to myself to never give up on myself like I did on that mat ever again. And although I am not the best wrestler, I always give 100% in every aspect of my life. This led to my success in wrestling, academics, and life in general. This is but one of the great qualities I learned from my brother. My uncle, a retired PMI at Camp Pendleton as well as my brother attending the USNA even after all the hardships we have been through gives me an inner drive like no other to serve this country and have the ability to lead and help build the future of this wonderful nation. It is without a shadow of doubt one of my life-long dreams to wear those clean cut and tailored navy dress blues as I proudly represent this God blessed nation and lead our future with the core values of Honor, Courage, and Commitment.
Thank you!
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I've wanted to become a leader of this country for as long as I can remember. My uncle SGT Abdelaziz instilled into my mind at a very young age a leader-like mindset which he passed on to my brother who is currently attending USNA. I vividly remember times when my uncle would make me run up hills as he trailed behind me in his truck, disciplining me while teaching me life lessons that will stick with me for the rest of my life. I've visited USNA multiple times and It's more than just free college and some service years in my eyes, it's the breeding grounds for my future growth as a individual and as a leader of this nation. My brother is one of my biggest role models/motivators in becoming a leader of this nation, whether it being a commissioned officer, leader of a club, or simply being a leader in my family. We both grew up in town-houses with our mother and step-dad living pay-check to pay-check, Yet we would never let those circumstances hold us and my brother pushed me and continues to push me to be a better man and lead by example to this day even with him far away from home at Annapolis. I grew up skinny, weak, and addicted to video games. All through-out elementary and middle school I was seen as the "skinny weird kid". My brother would always subtly tell me I need to change, but it wasn't until I followed his actions that I became a different man. I strongly believe with all my heart that to be a good leader, you must be a good follower - This is something my JROTC instructors would always preach to me. My brother started wrestling during his high school years and as I looked up to him greatly, I took on wrestling as well. I began practicing, and in my first wrestling match I lost in front of my brother, coaches, and friends - This broke me. I cried after the match until I manned up and realized there's no one to blame but myself - That's how it is in the sport of wrestling as well as in life. I replayed the video in my room at least 10 times, rewinding back to the exact point where I see I gave up mentally, and made a vow to myself to never give up on myself like I did on that mat ever again. And although I am not the best wrestler, I always give 100% in every aspect of my life. This led to my success in wrestling, academics, and life in general. This is but one of the great qualities I learned from my brother. My uncle, a retired PMI at Camp Pendleton as well as my brother attending the USNA even after all the hardships we have been through gives me an inner drive like no other to serve this country and have the ability to lead and help build the future of this wonderful nation. It is without a shadow of doubt one of my life-long dreams to wear those clean cut and tailored navy dress blues as I proudly represent this God blessed nation and lead our future with the core values of Honor, Courage, and Commitment.