DS plebe needing psychiatric services "beyond" WP

[ConstantSpread7]

My son, a plebe at West Point, is doing reasonably well academically, but he's been having some difficulties adjusting and relating to others, possibly experiencing some depression. He has been seeing a counselor at West Point since October. However, she recently suggested that he seek care outside of West Point, as his situation might require treatment beyond what she can offer. She recommended finding a private doctor in our area who accepts our private insurance (not Tricare). I assume they would prefer one in-person visit and the rest could be done virtually. I'm thinking they might want to treat with antidepressants. He contacted me yesterday asking if I could find a private doctor for him, as suggested by his counselor.

I have several concerns. First, would seeking a private doctor and attending virtual sessions violate any rules? Second, would taking prescribed antidepressants be a violation? Third, I know that mental health visits must be reported for security clearance; would this cause any issues? Fourth, I'm curious if there are additional services the military provides in situations like this. I'm aware of the increasing availability of online virtual treatment through doctors who can even prescribe medication.

 

[franknd]

You might be able to get good answers here, but I would think the best source to answer these questions would be the counselor he is seeing at West Point, wouldn't it?

 

[Impulsive]

My son, a plebe at West Point, is doing reasonably well academically, but he's been having some difficulties adjusting and relating to others, possibly experiencing some depression. He has been seeing a counselor at West Point since October. However, she recently suggested that he seek care outside of West Point, as his situation might require treatment beyond what she can offer. She recommended finding a private doctor in our area who accepts our private insurance (not Tricare). I assume they would prefer one in-person visit and the rest could be done virtually. I'm thinking they might want to treat with antidepressants. He contacted me yesterday asking if I could find a private doctor for him, as suggested by his counselor.

I have several concerns. First, would seeking a private doctor and attending virtual sessions violate any rules? Second, would taking prescribed antidepressants be a violation? Third, I know that mental health visits must be reported for security clearance; would this cause any issues? Fourth, I'm curious if there are additional services the military provides in situations like this. I'm aware of the increasing availability of online virtual treatment through doctors who can even prescribe medication.

JMHO, but be careful with this as taking a "antidepressant" could cause your son issues at WP. While anyone is free to see whatever doctor they want, Cadets are usually directed to go to Keller Army Hospital. This is important so that IF a disqualifying medical issue arises, the Cadet (because they are considered active duty soldiers) has documentation for disability benefits, both from the Army and the VA. If he elects to go "outside" the military treatment facilities, then further down the road is deemed medically unfit there will be no "official" documentation to support benefits if he cannot continue in the military.

Taking prescription antidepressants and continuing psychological treatment in itself requires that he see a psychiatrist and not a psychologist. This is major step up in treatment and using any psych meds while on AD is usually on a case by case basis and he needs to be careful he is not found to be unsuitable for military service and processed out. If he must be, if he stays within the military system all the documentation for a medical discharge are there.

If this were my son, I would have him talk to his current psychologist (therapist) and if needed his TAC to determine the best way to handle this. Remember, his health is PARAMOUNT FIRST, his military service second. You don't want him having problems or issues down the road or doing anything that could harm him or others.

 

[Jj332q4]

My son, a plebe at West Point, is doing reasonably well academically, but he's been having some difficulties adjusting and relating to others, possibly experiencing some depression. He has been seeing a counselor at West Point since October. However, she recently suggested that he seek care outside of West Point, as his situation might require treatment beyond what she can offer. She recommended finding a private doctor in our area who accepts our private insurance (not Tricare). I assume they would prefer one in-person visit and the rest could be done virtually. I'm thinking they might want to treat with antidepressants. He contacted me yesterday asking if I could find a private doctor for him, as suggested by his counselor.

I have several concerns. First, would seeking a private doctor and attending virtual sessions violate any rules? Second, would taking prescribed antidepressants be a violation? Third, I know that mental health visits must be reported for security clearance; would this cause any issues? Fourth, I'm curious if there are additional services the military provides in situations like this. I'm aware of the increasing availability of online virtual treatment through doctors who can even prescribe medication.

"mental care" really… I understand your son is new to the environment but it's already second semester. He really has to just toughen up. Ive visited West Point and will be attending soon and its honestly not that bad. I think that this might not be the right environment for him if he's already struggling. This is no diss to your son as many people are born and raised with different temperaments and I have no doubt that he is smart seeing as he got into WP. He will be commissioned as an officer and be forced to serve active duty at the minimum until 2036 should he continue. If he really just doesn't like the program its would be better for him to leave and enroll in a nice state uni. Don't let sunken cost cause him to do something he can't handle and exacerbate his mental health issues.

Tbh though he might be fine and just be ranting to you as an outlet since family are really the only people cadets can freely complain to. Encouragement will help him a lot more that feeding into his "depression". If he is a competitive person he can also be motivated by the fact that he was selected by our nation, few will have a service academy experience and the grit that comes with it, and people less mentally and physically capable than him have made it through a harder West Point (violent hazing, no modern amenities, etc) and made it out just fine.

Please just try to encourage instead of feed into this mental health stuff as it inadvertanly just brings down his morale.

 

[FutureAcademyDad?]

As @severn would say, "Non-concur". Plenty of mids and cadets seek and receive mental health care. DD1's roommate was on prescription during her tenure and graduated, commissioned and is now serving as an Ensign. Many of her other classmates sought counseling and/or other treatment modalities. Mental health is physical health. Seeking treatment to ameliorate mental or emotional issues should not be castigated.

 

[ConstantSpread7]

JMHO, but be careful with this as taking a "antidepressant" could cause your son issues at WP. While anyone is free to see whatever doctor they want, Cadets are usually directed to go to Keller Army Hospital. This is important so that IF a disqualifying medical issue arises, the Cadet (because they are considered active duty soldiers) has documentation for disability benefits, both from the Army and the VA. If he elects to go "outside" the military treatment facilities, then further down the road is deemed medically unfit there will be no "official" documentation to support benefits if he cannot continue in the military.

Taking prescription antidepressants and continuing psychological treatment in itself requires that he see a psychiatrist and not a psychologist. This is major step up in treatment and using any psych meds while on AD is usually on a case by case basis and he needs to be careful he is not found to be unsuitable for military service and processed out. If he must be, if he stays within the military system all the documentation for a medical discharge are there.

If this were my son, I would have him talk to his current psychologist (therapist) and if needed his TAC to determine the best way to handle this. Remember, his health is PARAMOUNT FIRST, his military service second. You don't want him having problems or issues down the road or doing anything that could harm him or others.

Thank You

Why would the therapist recommend him to seek treatment outside of West Point if everything he needs is there? Also, I'm sure cases of depression and other mental health issues arise within West Point with cadets. Are you suggesting that if this occurs, they are simply discharged instead of possibly receiving temporary treatment? Of course, his health comes first, but it seems like you're saying they would just dismiss him if they determine medication is necessary, even if it only requires a few months of treatment and therapy.

 

[ConstantSpread7]

As @severn would say, "Non-concur". Plenty of mids and cadets seek and receive mental health care. DD1's roommate was on prescription during her tenure and graduated, commissioned and is now serving as an Ensign. Many of her other classmates sought counseling and/or other treatment modalities. Mental health is physical health. Seeking treatment to ameliorate mental or emotional issues should not be castigated.

Thank You,

I spoke to my cadet tonight and he indicated he was talking to someone from MFLAC.

 

[A1Janitor]

"mental care" really… I understand your son is new to the environment but it's already second semester. He really has to just toughen up. Ive visited West Point and will be attending soon and its honestly not that bad. I think that this might not be the right environment for him if he's already struggling. This is no diss to your son as many people are born and raised with different temperaments and I have no doubt that he is smart seeing as he got into WP. He will be commissioned as an officer and be forced to serve active duty at the minimum until 2036 should he continue. If he really just doesn't like the program its would be better for him to leave and enroll in a nice state uni. Don't let sunken cost cause him to do something he can't handle and exacerbate his mental health issues.

Tbh though he might be fine and just be ranting to you as an outlet since family are really the only people cadets can freely complain to. Encouragement will help him a lot more that feeding into his "depression". If he is a competitive person he can also be motivated by the fact that he was selected by our nation, few will have a service academy experience and the grit that comes with it, and people less mentally and physically capable than him have made it through a harder West Point (violent hazing, no modern amenities, etc) and made it out just fine.

Please just try to encourage instead of feed into this mental health stuff as it inadvertanly just brings down his morale.

So you are basing your advice on visiting West Point once and will be attending? I assume you have had no medical training in high school?

Sometimes the ones who should remain silent, don’t.

 

[Jj332q4]

So you are basing your advice on visiting West Point once and will be attending? I assume you have had no medical training in high school?

Sometimes the ones who should remain silent, don’t.

All im saying is he needs perspective and motivation. All this mental health will not help for someone "depressed" from only plebe year at USMA. What is the kid going to do in the big army? Tbh talking does not resolve anything either. No matter how much he talks to some counselor, unless he leaves WP he will return on base and perform the same duties that are causing this "depression". Then his experience will get harder and harder relatively as academics and responsibilities increase as he becomes an upperclassmen.

 

[A1Janitor]

All im saying is he needs perspective and motivation. All this mental health will not help for someone "depressed" from only plebe year at USMA. What is the kid going to do in the big army? Tbh talking does not resolve anything either. No matter how much he talks to some counselor, unless he leaves WP he will return on base and perform the same duties that are causing this "depression". Then his experience will get harder and harder relatively as academics and responsibilities increase as he becomes an upperclassmen.

My daughter suffered from mental illness in high school.

You aren’t qualified to assess the situation, or offer advice. Sorry.

 

[jebdad]

All im saying is he needs perspective and motivation. All this mental health will not help for someone "depressed" from only plebe year at USMA. What is the kid going to do in the big army? Tbh talking does not resolve anything either. No matter how much he talks to some counselor, unless he leaves WP he will return on base and perform the same duties that are causing this "depression". Then his experience will get harder and harder relatively as academics and responsibilities increase as he becomes an upperclassmen.

You need to stop right now. You're over your skis. Please move along. I don't think any current plebe or parent needs a "toughen up" speech from you. I'm thinking your just a troll and if so that's sickening.

 

[Jj332q4]

My daughter suffered from mental illness in high school.

You aren’t qualified to assess the situation, or offer advice. Sorry.

You need to stop right now. You're over your skis. Please move along. I don't think any current plebe or parent needs a "toughen up" speech from you. I'm thinking your just a troll and if so that's sickening.

Im trying to have an honest discussion here. How can someone function as a leader in the army if they are having severe mental issue plebe year at USMA?

While we should treat everyone with love and compassion, there is a reason DODMERB disqualifies people with diagnosed depression, anxiety, etc, as well as people who take medication for mental issues. Im not saying USMA is sunshine and rainbows but taking medication or seeking extensive treatments off base for some sort of depression might be a sign that USMA is not right for you, which is not intrinsically wrong.

Obviously you will be melancholy certain days and feel bouts of depression as I think all cadets have, but as stated before treatment is limited. Taking medications is off the table if you want to stay at the academy, and I doubt talk therapy will help all that much because the cadet will be required to perform the same duties that are making the cadet depressed unless you leave the school.

Also I feel the condescending tone is really unwarranted as I've tried my best to stay amicable, but you guys seem to have this caricature of me as a "stupid high schooler" who knows nothing.

 

[Zaphod Beeblebrox]

There is not enough info here for anyone to give any real advice other than to get more information (from official sources such as the wp counselor and the DS) and to try to understand and support him with his issues.
His issues sound very serious if the military counselor says to stay outside military channels. This is a red flag.
The priority must be getting this kid on his feet so he can be a happy, productive member of society. Unfortunately, this may not include military service. It doesn't get any easier or less stressful moving forward.
I hope there is a positive outcome and his issues are resolved.

 

[Zaphod Beeblebrox]

Im trying to have an honest discussion here. How can someone function as a leader in the army if they are having severe mental issue plebe year at USMA?

While we should treat everyone with love and compassion, there is a reason DODMERB disqualifies people with diagnosed depression, anxiety, etc, as well as people who take medication for mental issues. Im not saying USMA is sunshine and rainbows but taking medication or seeking extensive treatments off base for some sort of depression might be a sign that USMA is not right for you, which is not intrinsically wrong.

Obviously you will be melancholy certain days and feel bouts of depression as I think all cadets have, but as stated before treatment is limited. Taking medications is off the table if you want to stay at the academy, and I doubt talk therapy will help all that much because the cadet will be required to perform the same duties that are making the cadet depressed unless you leave the school.

Also I feel the condescending tone is really unwarranted as I've tried my best to stay amicable, but you guys seem to have this caricature of me as a "stupid high schooler" who knows nothing.

Your focus is understandable. You are about to become a barrel-chested, steely-eyed freedom fighter that bathes in gasoline and eats things that would make a Billy goat puke. But the discussion here is about this young man's welfare more so than if he'd be suitable to lead a platoon onto Omaha Beach (that comes later).

 

[hopefulhockeymom]

My son, a plebe at West Point, is doing reasonably well academically, but he's been having some difficulties adjusting and relating to others, possibly experiencing some depression. He has been seeing a counselor at West Point since October. However, she recently suggested that he seek care outside of West Point, as his situation might require treatment beyond what she can offer. She recommended finding a private doctor in our area who accepts our private insurance (not Tricare). I assume they would prefer one in-person visit and the rest could be done virtually. I'm thinking they might want to treat with antidepressants. He contacted me yesterday asking if I could find a private doctor for him, as suggested by his counselor.

I have several concerns. First, would seeking a private doctor and attending virtual sessions violate any rules? Second, would taking prescribed antidepressants be a violation? Third, I know that mental health visits must be reported for security clearance; would this cause any issues? Fourth, I'm curious if there are additional services the military provides in situations like this. I'm aware of the increasing availability of online virtual treatment through doctors who can even prescribe medication.

This gets into tricky territory depending upon where you live. You would need to have him see providers (whether a prescriber for the meds and/or a therapist) who hold a license in NY. If home for you is in the northeast, that might be relatively easy as many behavioral health providers are licensed in surrounding states. Depending on what is prescribed, if anything, there may be issues with him getting the medications while at school.

If the WP therapist feels he needs to go off campus for care, and this isn’t going to cause an issue for him in terms of staying at WP, it might be best to find providers based in NY since that is where he will be spending the majority of his time over the next few years.

 

[CoffeeMama]

My son, a plebe at West Point, is doing reasonably well academically, but he's been having some difficulties adjusting and relating to others, possibly experiencing some depression. He has been seeing a counselor at West Point since October. However, she recently suggested that he seek care outside of West Point, as his situation might require treatment beyond what she can offer. She recommended finding a private doctor in our area who accepts our private insurance (not Tricare). I assume they would prefer one in-person visit and the rest could be done virtually. I'm thinking they might want to treat with antidepressants. He contacted me yesterday asking if I could find a private doctor for him, as suggested by his counselor.

I have several concerns. First, would seeking a private doctor and attending virtual sessions violate any rules? Second, would taking prescribed antidepressants be a violation? Third, I know that mental health visits must be reported for security clearance; would this cause any issues? Fourth, I'm curious if there are additional services the military provides in situations like this. I'm aware of the increasing availability of online virtual treatment through doctors who can even prescribe medication.

It is a tremendously challenging position to be in and my heart is with you and your plebe - not to be taken lightly. USMA does have support available that is next level up from MFLAC. You can find information here: https://www.westpoint.edu/performance-and-counseling-services ... that said I know that some cadets do not feel comfortable using the CPD because they perceive it will go on their record and adversely impact them in the future (could be that buzz/perception that is behind the MFLAC counselor suggesting going outside the USMA system although I'm not so sure that's great advice if medication is warranted/required). I don't have military background so I can't speak to whether the perception is accurate or not - I just know that's the buzz among cadets based on what I've seen on the West Point Mom's Facebook page - there have been a few recent threads there. I suggest you consider anonymously posting in that West Point Mom's FB group this same information and ask for resources. There are moms whose cadets have gone through similar at USMA and they are a wealth of information, options and support to someone in your situation - they can also invite you to connect privately in the chat on Facebook.

The other thing I have to offer is that (aside from severe depression that may require attention), a good amount of what you describe in terms of difficulty adjusting and relating to others is not out of the ordinary especially freshman year. It's quite common even at civilian colleges - you can google that. I have a younger kiddo who has a history of anxiety and depression so we have been preparing for the likely possibility of all the things you describe when that one goes to college next Fall. Also, anecdotally a solid number of my friends' college freshmen at civilian universities are currently facing similar issues to what your DS is experiencing - feeling like they can't find "their people" and wondering if they made a mistake in their choice of schools. It can be a bit of a surprise in the 2nd semester after all the newness and excitement has worn off and reality sets in. At a service academy you can add to that the multiple layers of extra things plebes have to deal with such as being yelled at by upper class cadets on the daily - which I would imagine is taxing, not being allowed to talk outside - which would be conducive to forming friendships, heavy schedules/demands that make it challenging to meet other people outside their immediate associations just to name a few. Letting him know that a lot of what he is going through is normal might help a little ... and guiding him in finding the right support while he is working through this hurdle is super important. I wish you and your DS all the best in navigating.

I also hope our young friend @Jj3324 has made it this far and has learned something that may help him in his quest to be a good leader.

 

[ConstantSpread7]

It is a tremendously challenging position to be in and my heart is with you and your plebe - not to be taken lightly. USMA does have support available that is next level up from MFLAC. You can find information here: https://www.westpoint.edu/performance-and-counseling-services ... that said I know that some cadets do not feel comfortable using the CPD because they perceive it will go on their record and adversely impact them in the future (could be that buzz/perception that is behind the MFLAC counselor suggesting going outside the USMA system although I'm not so sure that's great advice if medication is warranted/required). I don't have military background so I can't speak to whether the perception is accurate or not - I just know that's the buzz among cadets based on what I've seen on the West Point Mom's Facebook page - there have been a few recent threads there. I suggest you consider anonymously posting in that West Point Mom's FB group this same information and ask for resources. There are moms whose cadets have gone through similar at USMA and they are a wealth of information, options and support to someone in your situation - they can also invite you to connect privately in the chat on Facebook.

The other thing I have to offer is that (aside from severe depression that may require attention), a good amount of what you describe in terms of difficulty adjusting and relating to others is not out of the ordinary especially freshman year. It's quite common even at civilian colleges - you can google that. I have a younger kiddo who has a history of anxiety and depression so we have been preparing for the likely possibility of all the things you describe when that one goes to college next Fall. Also, anecdotally a solid number of my friends' college freshmen at civilian universities are currently facing similar issues to what your DS is experiencing - feeling like they can't find "their people" and wondering if they made a mistake in their choice of schools. It can be a bit of a surprise in the 2nd semester after all the newness and excitement has worn off and reality sets in. At a service academy you can add to that the multiple layers of extra things plebes have to deal with such as being yelled at by upper class cadets on the daily - which I would imagine is taxing, not being allowed to talk outside - which would be conducive to forming friendships, heavy schedules/demands that make it challenging to meet other people outside their immediate associations just to name a few. Letting him know that a lot of what he is going through is normal might help a little ... and guiding him in finding the right support while he is working through this hurdle is super important. I wish you and your DS all the best in navigating.

I also hope our young friend @Jj3324 has made it this far and has learned something that may help him in his quest to be a good leader.

Thanks for your advice,

I'm in the WP Dad's group but can't find the WP Mom's group. I was searching for this group before and somewhere I read the group was nuked because the Mom's were posting plebs private letters etc.

 

[shock-n-awe]

Im trying to have an honest discussion here. How can someone function as a leader in the army if they are having severe mental issue plebe year at USMA?

While we should treat everyone with love and compassion, there is a reason DODMERB disqualifies people with diagnosed depression, anxiety, etc, as well as people who take medication for mental issues. Im not saying USMA is sunshine and rainbows but taking medication or seeking extensive treatments off base for some sort of depression might be a sign that USMA is not right for you, which is not intrinsically wrong.

Obviously you will be melancholy certain days and feel bouts of depression as I think all cadets have, but as stated before treatment is limited. Taking medications is off the table if you want to stay at the academy, and I doubt talk therapy will help all that much because the cadet will be required to perform the same duties that are making the cadet depressed unless you leave the school.

Also I feel the condescending tone is really unwarranted as I've tried my best to stay amicable, but you guys seem to have this caricature of me as a "stupid high schooler" who knows nothing.

The struggle at an SA is real. Everyone faces challenges at some point. While most don’t need to see a therapist, mental health issues need to be taken seriously. You have zero personal experience of living at the Academy. Your weighing in on how this actual Cadet needs to behave has no merit.
There are 22 Veteran suicides per day .

Military Service Members and Veterans – Suicide Prevention Resource Center

sprc.org

Should they have toughened up?
My DS a WP grad just completed a suicide investigation on a soldier in one of his companies. There was a Cadet suicide at WP while DS was a Cadet. There were suicides in some of my units back in the day. Mental issues back then were a sign of weakness and no one spoke about it. Today the military takes it much more seriously as they should. This is reality.
Please don’t be dismissive of those reaching out for help. Maybe the OP’s Cadet will separate if their mental health and depression is too extreme for them to continue . The Army will assess and determine.
Let them work through it.

 

[justdoit19]

Im trying to have an honest discussion here. How can someone function as a leader in the army if they are having severe mental issue plebe year at USMA?

While we should treat everyone with love and compassion, there is a reason DODMERB disqualifies people with diagnosed depression, anxiety, etc, as well as people who take medication for mental issues. Im not saying USMA is sunshine and rainbows but taking medication or seeking extensive treatments off base for some sort of depression might be a sign that USMA is not right for you, which is not intrinsically wrong.

Obviously you will be melancholy certain days and feel bouts of depression as I think all cadets have, but as stated before treatment is limited. Taking medications is off the table if you want to stay at the academy, and I doubt talk therapy will help all that much because the cadet will be required to perform the same duties that are making the cadet depressed unless you leave the school.

Also I feel the condescending tone is really unwarranted as I've tried my best to stay amicable, but you guys seem to have this caricature of me as a "stupid high schooler" who knows nothing.

If someone has a broken arm, or poor eyesight, would you tell them to ‘toughen up’? ‘Get over it’?

Absolutely not. Brains break, too. And need medical intervention.

Your ignorant attitude is detrimental to you as a future officer, as much as you are perpetuating you belief that this plebe will be detrimental as a future officer. You will eventually need to recognize when those under your care require some intervention. And then let MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS handle it. Those who are trained. Not people with opinions, no matter their age.

Seriously, no disrespect intended but you really do need to not make overarching assumptions about ANY kind of health, based upon your opinions. You need to learn to send someone that’s broken to med staff, and let them handle it. Whether you can visually see the ailment, or not.

Poor vision gets glasses. Broken arm gets a cast. Mental breaks also require attention. It bodes well for you as a future officer to recognize this.

The counselor is the ONLY person that can recommend further care. Good for this plebe for recognizing that and seeking help.

And hugs to Mom and dad, worry about their child from a distance.

Idk anything about private vs Tricare. Why isn’t USMA sending him themselves? Why is this rec for private pay insurance? Don’t answer. But make sure he/you (as it’s your insurance, imo) understand. I suspect your plebe can grant permission for you to speak with his counselor. If he wishes. Alternately, another source may be chaplains.

Just hugs. And help your child recognize that this is only a little blip on his life radar on the journey of where he ultimately ends up. Hang in there!!

 

[MomToHopefuls]

Also I feel the condescending tone is really unwarranted as I've tried my best to stay amicable, but you guys seem to have this caricature of me as a "stupid high schooler" who knows nothing.

I have an undergraduate degree in psychology and a graduate degree in a semi-related field and I don't feel qualified to give advice. Please recognize your lack of training and experience in the medical field. You're clearly a respectable and intelligent member of the community if you've been offered an appointment. I pray that you never suffer from mental health issues, lest you be told to "suck it up" and be judged in the same manner in which you've judged your future peers. Please use your words wisely.