My ranking of the experiences, as a plebe parent this year:
1) A-Day weekend, and the word weekend is key here. The anticipation for the A-Day parade, and then waiting to see my son for the first time in many weeks was very special. A-day tops R-day for me, because you then get to spend Saturday evening, and Sunday until about 5:00 PM with your plebe.
2) R-day, is a unique experience, as there is fear, apprehension, and nervousness in the air....and that is just with the parents!! The long wait in the line until they get to go in for the 4 minute "boiler plate" speech, the quick goodbye, and wow it is only 7:50 AM, and now what do we do? There is actually plenty to do, and see during the day, and it goes by pretty quickly. Then the oath ceremony was very special. It is a great day, but it is not spent with your plebe, at all, after you say goodbye in the early morning.
3) Plebe-Parent weekend, was very fun, but I rank it third for a few reasons. One reason is that you are mostly on post, and although some of the activities are interesting, there was something lacking. I think it was the fact that the Plebes just really wanted to get out of there, and get home for spring break! It was very much worth the trip, so I am not trying to knock the experience, just liked the other days better.
4) Marchback, was great to see, but that is all you get to do is see the historic event. If you are in the area, or able to make the trip without to much hassle, I recommend it, but again realize there is no interaction with your plebe. Probably will not even see them.
Ok, this is my longest post to date, so hopefully will help someone. We live in Maryland, so it is not that big of a deal to get up to West Point. If we lived farther away, and had to pick one or two events to attend, above is our list using hindsight.