Well, I finally read the article and it wasn't half bad.
Through the first few years "thank you" was hard to hear as I was a cadet, but I figured it wasn't really me they were thanking as much as the uniform I was wearing, so I'd respond thanking them for saying something.
While "thanks yous" are leveled at people for a variety of reasons, it hasn't bothered me in the same way that it did the author. I don't want to question someone's motive, whether or not they've served or if they have any idea what I've done. They probably don't. I never expected a thank you, and short of buying a fellow Coastie I run into a round at a bar, I don't run down the closest person in uniform to thank them.
I figure it's broken down a few ways.... those who have served and those who haven't is the first cut off. That's further broken down by the branches you served in. I feel far more connected to another Coast Guardsman than a soldier, sailor, airman, or Marine, and I'm WAY more likely to buy him a drink (don't worry folks, 98% of the military is Army, Navy, Air Force or Marine Corps, someone will buy 'em a drink, I'll take care of that other 2%).
I would not feel comfortable thanking one of my peers in my service. It's been far more comfortable just relating to life in general, hitting on common threads between services, or more focused themes in your own service. That said, I'm a veteran, no active duty or reserves anymore, so while I still identify with my fellow Coasties, I'm not sharing their load anymore. That transition is a little hard. You have an identity during your service...heck you're even color coded and have a special little symbol to show your place in that organization...and then it stops.
What DOES annoy me is people who have never served who have something to say. My classmate in grad school in a prior Marine. I'm a Coast Guard vet. We go back and forth, playfully making fun of each other. That's cool. I'm fine with anyone joking.... provided they've "stepped up" and done something. I don't like a civilian who has never served trying to get in on that action.... talking trash about another service is something you earn when/after you've served...and it's something that sort of obligates you to defend your own branch. Joe Blow undergrad from Civilian School should not feel the need to "relate" to something he's never done. The banter is playful (usually) between the services because everyone has a leg to stand on, but when it comes from a third party.... it's annoying at best, and dangerous at worst. And then... when alcohol is involved all bets are off and investigations follow!