KP is so right regarding the strength it takes to be their mate. Take this time to also ask yourself if you want that life also. Love is great, but sometimes it just isn't enough.
Not only is his career going to send him away for long stretches, but you may not have control over it. During the course of my 20 yr marriage to Bullet these are things that happened.
1. Deployed 10 days after our 1st born.
2. Deployed during my 9th month of pregnancy for DS2, returned 3 days prior to the birth, and OBTW we had 2 others at home (4 and 2).
3. Missed every halloween until the youngest was 7.
4. Deployed for:
Thanksgivings, Valentines day, anniversaries, B'days, Holy Communions, graduations, etc
I am considered getting off lucky because he was always home for Xmas and the births of our children.
Additionally, one suggestion I would give you is learn how to or get used to:
A. Change a flat tire.
B. How to do minor repairs...i.e. snaking a toilet.
C. Accepting Murphy's law.
I can tell you that not once in the 20 yrs did something major not break while he was gone. We would be proactive, taking the cars to the mechanics prior, changing batteries in the smoke detectors, etc., but within 24 hours after he was gone, the car got a flat tire, a fuse would blow, kids would get chicken pox, etc.
That is why I say look at yourself and ask yourself what you want in life for yourself. Many wives don't work, not because they are wanting to be June Cleaver, but because it takes a strong wife to be able to juggle being Mom and Dad and work when Dad is gone. I am def. not saying it isn't doable, just stating that you need to understand this situation right now is the easiest and you need to be honest with him and yourself about the what if?
What if we are the 2% club and get married? I want to do XYZ for myself, can that work? What will we do if I get a great career opportunity which requires us moving?
These questions seem silly, but as a wife of a retired AF O-5, I can tell you that at a certain point these are going to be impacting your life. The ones that have not made a plan, are the ones that end up in divorce. The reason why is resentment misplaces the love that was there due to the fact that they never had a true discussion regarding each other's goals. It was typically about "him" and his goals. 17 and it is love, 32, and it is I have given up my dreams, my life for you because I loved you.
FWIW, Bullet and I met the day after my HS graduation, dated long distance for our4 yrs at college (Me-PA, him MD...neither of us had cars), and we will be celebrating our 23rd wedding anniversary in Dec.
I loved every second of that life and what do it again in a heart beat....even joked at his retirement we'll probably get divorced now because I will not be use to him not being deployed at least 4 months out of the yr. and I'm not sure I can live with him 365 days a yr
Heck, even our kids asked me while he was converting to the "real world" when is Daddy gong back to work, he is really getting on my nerves!
You love them, just like I love Bullet, just do both of you a favor, put your life first. By doing so, you will feel confident about the relationship, and he is going to love you that much more. The reason why is he will know you have a life without him, but choose to have it with him.
Good luck.