I can't stand this forum

[justsomecadet]

I haven't logged in here in almost a year. Every now and then I glance at it, and usually get bored and walk away. Mostly, it's admissions questions that get few concrete responses. Most of the chatter, though, is arguments about the academy, the military, and life that get hundreds of replies.

What confounds me is what all these old grads and parents are doing on this forum. Mostly, it seems, someone asks an innocuous admissions question and you guys analyze and make assumptions about a person's entire life, giving advice on everything under the sun. Too often, your opinions are irrelevant or even damaging.

I logged in today and saw half the comments on a post yucking it up making fun of someone asking for leather-free boots. The other half were essentially lecturing the poster on the ethos of the military. Hardly anyone provided anything of value. In another post bemoaning standards at USAFA, a long time poster and moderator made a sweeping generalization saying non-white cadets were more likely have their hair out of regs. No one batted an eye. I've seen posts where a highschooler admits to lying or trying weed or some other common mistake, and most of the commenters question the poster's fitness for the military, their integrity, their maturity, etc. On multiple occasions I've seen parents or grads providing wildly inaccurate information about fitness or weight standards, advising highschoolers to lose weight to meet the BMI standards. It's ridiculous. Most athletes are over the BMI standard, and instead easily pass the tape test.
I can't say it any clearer: You Don't Know What You're Talking About.

When I was a candidate, reading this forum made me less excited to come to USAFA. It's filled with judgement, toxicity, and hypocrisy. You all (parents and grads) hold up an unrealistic image of this school, and then attempt to compare prospective candidates to that image. You espouse ideals that no longer align with those of the air force (stereotyping minorities, advocating for the "good old days" of hazing). About a year ago, I wrote a post attempting to give a more balanced view of who cadets are. For candidates and prospective cadets, it might be worth a read, especially if the yapping on this forum makes you think sainthood or a stick up your rear is required for admission to USAFA.

I guess I just don't understand why so many old grads and parents frequent this page with such fervor. Is it to help prospective candidates? Most of you don't know much current, useful admissions info, evidenced by the fact that most admission questions get just a handful of replies. Are you here to provide your perspective on life at the academy? Again, your opinions are largely outdated, and sometimes offensive and damaging. It seems to me that most of you spend most of your time providing stodgy opinions and chatting up other grads and parents.

It's a shame to me since this is the only source of information I had as a prospective candidate, and I'm sure there are plenty of candidates who form their view of the Academy based on the posts here. Like the title says, I can't stand this forum, and I think this is probably the last time I'll post here. However, since I read these posts religiously while applying during COVID, I feel some small responsibility to current candidates to provide them a different perspective. Especially for those of you who seem to be chronically online here, maybe try not logging on here for a week, or a month. Take a walk. Read a book. Learn a new hobby. Whatever you do though, for the love of god, if you're going to pump your opinions into this space, at least try to make sure they're accurate and relevant.

 

[USMC Crayons]

I haven't logged in here in almost a year. Every now and then I glance at it, and usually get bored and walk away. Mostly, it's admissions questions that get few concrete responses. Most of the chatter, though, is arguments about the academy, the military, and life that get hundreds of replies.

What confounds me is what all these old grads and parents are doing on this forum. Mostly, it seems, someone asks an innocuous admissions question and you guys analyze and make assumptions about a person's entire life, giving advice on everything under the sun. Too often, your opinions are irrelevant or even damaging.

I logged in today and saw half the comments on a post yucking it up making fun of someone asking for leather-free boots. The other half were essentially lecturing the poster on the ethos of the military. Hardly anyone provided anything of value. In another post bemoaning standards at USAFA, a long time poster and moderator made a sweeping generalization saying non-white cadets were more likely have their hair out of regs. No one batted an eye. I've seen posts where a highschooler admits to lying or trying weed or some other common mistake, and most of the commenters question the poster's fitness for the military, their integrity, their maturity, etc. On multiple occasions I've seen parents or grads providing wildly inaccurate information about fitness or weight standards, advising highschoolers to lose weight to meet the BMI standards. It's ridiculous. Most athletes are over the BMI standard, and instead easily pass the tape test.
I can't say it any clearer: You Don't Know What You're Talking About.

When I was a candidate, reading this forum made me less excited to come to USAFA. It's filled with judgement, toxicity, and hypocrisy. You all (parents and grads) hold up an unrealistic image of this school, and then attempt to compare prospective candidates to that image. You espouse ideals that no longer align with those of the air force (stereotyping minorities, advocating for the "good old days" of hazing). About a year ago, I wrote a post attempting to give a more balanced view of who cadets are. For candidates and prospective cadets, it might be worth a read, especially if the yapping on this forum makes you think sainthood or a stick up your rear is required for admission to USAFA.

I guess I just don't understand why so many old grads and parents frequent this page with such fervor. Is it to help prospective candidates? Most of you don't know much current, useful admissions info, evidenced by the fact that most admission questions get just a handful of replies. Are you here to provide your perspective on life at the academy? Again, your opinions are largely outdated, and sometimes offensive and damaging. It seems to me that most of you spend most of your time providing stodgy opinions and chatting up other grads and parents.

It's a shame to me since this is the only source of information I had as a prospective candidate, and I'm sure there are plenty of candidates who form their view of the Academy based on the posts here. Like the title says, I can't stand this forum, and I think this is probably the last time I'll post here. However, since I read these posts religiously while applying during COVID, I feel some small responsibility to current candidates to provide them a different perspective. Especially for those of you who seem to be chronically online here, maybe try not logging on here for a week, or a month. Take a walk. Read a book. Learn a new hobby. Whatever you do though, for the love of god, if you're going to pump your opinions into this space, at least try to make sure they're accurate and relevant.

Could not agree more. There are some very helpful people on here, but also some parents that frankly use this forum to brag about their kids non-stop. We don't care that your kid aced the SAT or built an atom smasher in your basement when he was 6. I will also say that a significant amount of advice of "old-timers" here directly conflicts with what admissions, or current attendees will tell you.

 

[99Gold]

As a parent who needed information to aid her kids applying, this forum has been a great source of information and much more accurate than Reddit or Facebook. It’s also a nice place to pass the time while we’re waiting for decisions to be made. I‘m glad I found it when my oldest started the process 4 years ago.

 

[YSNC]

As a parent who needed information to aid her kids applying, this forum has been a great source of information and much more accurate than Reddit or Facebook. It’s also a nice place to pass the time while we’re waiting for decisions to be made. I‘m glad I found it when my oldest started the process 4 years ago.

100%

 

[Holden100]

I think it's an excellent reminder, from a former applicant, we should be a bit more measured and accurate in whatever information is given here. Justsomecadet has some very honest, refreshing and extremely well written posts (thank you for the reminder to look at your post from a year ago; it's so great). Maybe the parents should refrain from giving advice on which school to pick or, gasp, anything pertaining to medical. And, instead, encourage the applicants with those questions to talk with their parents, teachers, counselors rather than an anonymous message board. As a parent I have found this site to be very helpful for me and my questions, but I really hope my kids aren't on here asking questions they should be asking me and my husband. Or if they are, I hope they still come to me with whatever information they gather from whatever source, so that we can help them make sound decisions. Just today I was searching for information on summer AROTC trainings and found lots of good, informative posts. But I very much appreciate the reminder from justsomecadet.

 

[Eaglehurst]

That's a shame as I think you have some really great insights and advice to add.

I recall one of your posts describing the spectrum of cadets you get at the Air Force academy. I think the same could be said about this forum. There are contributors with relevant and current experience and there are those folks, like me, who didn't even know the slightest thing about service academies (until junior got involved 12 months ago) and pretty much everything in between.

Potential candidates, parents, advisers, grads etc come to this forum for different reasons. Honestly, to say there are so many ex-service people on here (who let's be clear are never short of an opinion) I am amazed at how constructive and cordial it mostly is.

I have found the forum hugely useful....but like anything in life, there is some sorting the proverbial 'wheat from the chaff'.

Don't leave - keep your counsel/advice coming, be patient with the KnowItAll's and the know-nothings....and try to be tolerant of crazy helicopter parents with kids they want to brag about but are secretly absolutely terrified of the shortcomings of their prodigy and how that s**t show will play out in frankly any academy....

 

[majorarray]

I logged in today and saw half the comments on a post yucking it up making fun of someone asking for leather-free boots.

Finally someone said it. Personally, this forum has been helpful in understanding the admissions process, even though the only helpful advice has been coming from ALOs, BGOs, etc. It's shameful that a forum oriented around what is supposed to be a large organization structured by honor, integrity, respect, and other core values, would make fun of and disrespect another person's viewpoint. A popular topic of this forum is the swinging of the pendulum and how USAFA has become too soft. Maybe it has in some ways, but respecting how other people think and not shoving your own opinions down their throat is basic human decency, not "too soft". It's ok to disagree with someone and be vocal about it, but belittling, discouraging, or disrespecting them is NOT ok.

The other half were essentially lecturing the poster on the ethos of the military.

I think this is very hypocritical. How can these old grads question someone's motivation to attend a SA and adapt to the military's culture and lifestyle, when they themselves have failed to adapt to today's society and military? It's laughable, be better.

 

[SpiritCommitteeLiaison]

I think this topic may turn into an "old grad" and "parent" bashing session. Respect is a 2-way street.

I think OP has some good points , though.

If you have questions, ask your ALO first. I understand, however, that some are not as available as others. This forum is run by ALOs/BGOs, so its their responses you should focus on.

If its a specific admissions question and you are a candidate, contact your Blue Team or Silver Team admissions advisor. They are supposed to answer within 48 hours. ALOs have rules on what we can respond to -- that's so we don't give outdated information. We do go through annual training, though. For instance, we are not doctors, so we don't have access to DoDMERB nor waiver status information. We can, however, tell you what the process is.

Now for old grads. Their perspectives are their own and certainly valid. Not just because of their time at the Academy, but also their time in the big Air Force. Old grads will talk about "back when it was hard" and its done in jest. They know what they sound like. I have a friend (a General) who says "USAFA builds bonds through adversity." I think that quote still applies. I do not believe these grads intend to be disrespectful at all. I know many and there is plenty of "dark humor". It is a coping mechanism. So for the candidate that asked about the boots - I truly believe that many of the comments were tongue-in-cheek and not meant to be disrespectful. It was a way to let the candidate know that there will be many times that ethical materials won't be used. Maybe the old grads need to realize that their humor is lost on high school students?

Some parents are either overly-pumped about the academy or overly-disappointed (I know - I run the parent Facebook support forums). Most are pretty reasonable. Just keep in mind that they have formed their opinions based on their own perspectives and what their cadet has told them. Everyone's experience at USAFA is different. Some cadets have hated it all 4 years. Others loved it. Its often dependent on the leadership and the squadron they are assigned.

I concur with OP. The "hardest" part of the academy is mental, not physical. Most that attend are already physically fit and if not in peak shape, will get there pretty quickly (or go on Recondo). I do personally know a handful that were disenrolled for failing PFT/AFT too many times. But I know many more who could not handle the academics, briefings, and everything else that takes time. This is why learning good time management skills is important, as well as knowing how to prioritize. Yes, sometimes things don't get done on time. The other reasons for forced disenrollment are honor hits. Don't do it. Don't lie, cheat, nor steal. As OP says, some do anyway. That doesn't mean its right and it certainly doesn't mean that you'll get away with it. I can't tell you how many times I have had to console a parent because their cadet is being disenrolled for cheating or other honor violations. Another word of advice: If you get caught, don't lie about it.

So to reiterate the most important parts:
1) Speak to your ALO first
2) Contact admissions for admissions related questions (your ALO will tell you when s/he can't answer)
3) Read the comments from the ALOs and BGOs. There are USAFA instructors on here, so their responses can be valuable as well. Current cadets also have valuable information, but again, it is one perspective.
4) Keep in mind that old grads and parents will give advice based on their own experience. Get information from multiple sources. Once you have started the application process, your ALO is your best source.

One final thought - OP is also correct in that there are good people and bad people at USAFA. That's just the way of the world. No matter what job you have, what university you attend, even what church you frequent, you will have people who are selfish, generous, harsh, kind, etc. Going into the Academy and believing everyone is the "perfect" cadet is to go in believing a fairytale.

 

[gniyji]

Could not agree more. There are some very helpful people on here, but also some parents that frankly use this forum to brag about their kids non-stop. We don't care that your kid aced the SAT or built an atom smasher in your basement when he was 6. I will also say that a significant amount of advice of "old-timers" here directly conflicts with what admissions, or current attendees will tell you.

I plea guilty for having mentioning DS's SAT on USNA forums. They were all related to some users' posts stats on getting into NASS or USNA appointment. I mentioned it as a loser in the application process. Just to remind users not to emphasize on test scores. As some other users have mentioned --- you have to get everything good to be competitive.

I should also mention that in my DS' class of around 100 students, the average SAT is 1540 and ACT 35. So in my circle -- nobody would ever brag on SAT.

My other two kids didn't score SAT well, one scored 890 (2019), the other scored 1150 (2021). They are all our kids (genetically same parents, and grow up in the same household)

DS is the only one who applies for SA and ROTC. As an immigrant, I am indeed very proud that the smartest and the strongest one from my family is willing to serve the country we are so grateful.

 

[HSGrad25]

About a year ago, I wrote a post attempting to give a more balanced view of who cadets are. For candidates and prospective cadets, it might be worth a read, especially if the yapping on this forum makes you think sainthood or a stick up your rear is required for admission to USAFA.

I just read your post, and it was just what I needed to hear. I'm currently a Junior in a tiny town, and I have been questioning myself for a few months about if I am good enough. I've been comparing myself to people who've aced the ACT, or are freak athletes, or have opportunities that I don't. Comparison is the thief of joy. I've wanted to go to the Academy as long as I can remember, and the first thing that caught my eye about the Academy, besides the awesome architecture, was the words above the ramp leading to the campus. Reading your post made me remember that what the Academy looks for is good people; people who take the initiative to make themselves better every day. The Academy, I've read, is designed as a pressure cooker, to see who have the mental and physical grit to make it through and become a better person. Is what admissions look for exactly that? People who have applied themselves previously in high school and proved that they have potential and grit? Who show that they do their best despite their circumstances?

 

[SpiritCommitteeLiaison]

I just read your post, and it was just what I needed to hear. I'm currently a Junior in a tiny town, and I have been questioning myself for a few months about if I am good enough. I've been comparing myself to people who've aced the ACT, or are freak athletes, or have opportunities that I don't. Comparison is the thief of joy. I've wanted to go to the Academy as long as I can remember, and the first thing that caught my eye about the Academy, besides the awesome architecture, was the words above the ramp leading to the campus. Reading your post made me remember that what the Academy looks for is good people; people who take the initiative to make themselves better every day. The Academy, I've read, is designed as a pressure cooker, to see who have the mental and physical grit to make it through and become a better person. Is what admissions look for exactly that? People who have applied themselves previously in high school and proved that they have potential and grit? Who show that they do their best despite their circumstances?

Have you started the application process? If so, you will be assigned an ALO who can help you answer all of those questions. A cadet has no knowledge about what is happening in admissions.

USAFA does look at each candidate independently of others. In other words, they take your circumstances into consideration and gauge how you overcome adversity, how you reached for leadership opportunities (notice I didn't say "hold leadership positions"), how you helped in the community or civic service, how well you did in school, at the clubs/sports/etc. you were involved with, and so on.

Your ALO can review you resume with you and give you feedback.

 

[Osprey123]

I think this topic may turn into an "old grad" and "parent" bashing session. Respect is a 2-way street.

I found OP's post to be very disrespectful to the people who post here, especially since many here volunteer for and support USAFA and the cadets with both time and money and are veterans themselves. You can always just block people that you don't agree with.

 

[Wahoo Fan]

I agree with some of the sentiment of the OP, especially about rude replies. Being rude and disrespectful is not consistent with any branch of the military.

But on a different note, our family considered this forum essential in the academy and ROTC application process because there simply is no other place to find such information, and therefore I wouldn’t recommend throwing the baby out with the bathwater. Obviously this is an anonymous forum, and people will post erroneous information. One must read the replies carefully, gleaning useful information and ignoring the rest. In addition, it is extremely useful to search for old threads and compare prior advice. When you read in such a way, you can often get a clearer picture of what you are trying to learn.

I am a parent of a kid who applied several years ago. The reason I come back is try to to offer advice to the current crop of candidates and their parents. I feel it is my duty to try to be helpful to others since so many people were helpful to us.

 

[Old Enlisted Marine]

BELOW IS FROM OP , POSTED IN THE PAST……. Well written and a perspective that should be considered.​

This post is something that's been floating around in my head for a while, but I haven't had the chance to share it. I wanted to put it out here to give a slightly different perspective on the Academy.

I used this forum obsessively under a different account as a candidate. These days (two years from my I-day), I log on every now and then when I don't want to do homework. One thing I've noticed is that nearly every perspective on here are those of parents and "old grads." The former see a distorted version of USAFA, and the latter have a distinctly rose tinted view of the experience, at least when giving advice to candidates. I want to say that I don't think these views (the grads at least) have it wrong. Without a doubt, grads have wisdom and relevant experience that cadets don't. I, unlike many here, believe the experience makes you better. However, that fact is often obscured behind the day to day drudgery of USAFA. Neither the parents or the grads are wrong, but they represent different perspectives on USAFA, neither of which will be lived by a candidate for many years. The realest, most immediate experience a candidate will have is that of a cadet. Here are a few thoughts from that experience.

The first misconception is about who goes to USAFA. As candidates, we have this image that cadets are rule-following, hard working, motivated, kind and caring. We're all honest, we manage our time well, and we get to do incredible things all the time. This is true for some of us. Not so much for others. Like any school, cadets span a broad spectrum of kindness, honesty, and dedication. There are the genuinely amazing people, who embody everything we learn about cadets. They are highly ranked, get great grades, work out, do research and pursue extracurriculars. On the other end of the spectrum are the "2.0 and go" crowd. Many of them do a bare minimum, play a lot of video games, party hard, or just generally slack. They generally don't get their top choices for programs like airmanship or ops AF. The majority, though, are regular people who primarily exist as some combination of the extremes. They're satisfied with a certain performance level, and not willing to sacrifice socializing or other recreation for a better class rank.
The key is that a person's place along this spectrum has no bearing on whether they're a "good person." Some of the highest achieving cadets are snakes who will do anything to add something to their resume. Some cadets on the edge of disenrollment are the most genuine and caring people I've met. There are people throughout the class, ranked high and low, who lie and cheat (and to a lesser degree, steal). On the same note, there are good cadets who don't always follow the rules. I've made mistakes that could put me on probation or get me kicked out. I've done other things with the same punishments that I stand by. Nevertheless, most people would consider me a good cadet. On the flip side, there are bad cadets who never break a major rule. There are bad people who are good cadets according to the standards the Academy sets. As far as I see it, if you are passionate about your people (classmates and subordinates) and your mission (to graduate and bring value to the AF), and you're smart about the liberties you take, you can deviate from rules quite a bit and still be a successful, good person.

The second piece that I'd like to share is about the cadet experience. Thanks to the media team, the public primarily sees cadets from a far, marching in a parade, crawling through the mud, watching a flyover, or working on an expensive looking lab machine. These, even the mud, are some of the best parts of the cadet experience. You don't see the bitter complaints about having to march through six inches of snow to put on a parade with 10 spectators. You don't see the problem set that is due the same day as two essays and a test. When grads and parents talk about it being "hard," candidates imagine that it's hard because you have to do pushups, or because you're busy doing all these cool things. That's not true. It's hard because you don't want to be there. It's hard because your next 5 days are packed with due dates, tests, and mandatory events that feel like a waste of your time. It's hard because sometimes, when you look at your schedule, you feel suffocated. You feel trapped. You just want to take a nap, but you can't because of that essay you haven't written. It's hard because it feels like leadership and the AOG spends more time and money making this place look good to candidates and athletic recruits than they do solving the problems cadets face.

Don't get me wrong--on average, I love it here. When the sun rises and lights up the mountains, it's magical. If you pick a major you enjoy, some of the classes can be awesome. If you help foster it, a squadron can be an amazing family you won't get at any other school.
Some people will swear they wouldn't be here if they could afford to go somewhere else. My family could have afforded any school I got into. I've put a lot of thought into whether I'd be happier at another school, and ultimately decided that I would not.

My defining takeaway from the Academy so far is that it will be what you make it. That's a tired cliché, but it rings true. The Academy gives you nothing if you do not take it. It doesn't make you a good person. It doesn't make you smarter. The Academy does not improve you, you improve you. If you want to be happy, you need to put in constant effort managing your time, your mindset, and your expectations. You need to realize that the USAFA you see from the media team is not the USAFA you will live for four years. It is not a panacea that will solve the problems in your life. It is a school and the beginning of a career. If you want to fix yourself, it will be you doing the fixing, not USAFA.

This is just my opinion from my relatively short time here. I'm sure that once I graduate and eventually become an "old grad" myself, the cynicism will fade and I'll have much more wisdom about the benefits from the Academy. For now though, I thought it might be worth the time to share a perspective from the trenches of cadet life.

 

[MidCakePa]

A major reason that I love and appreciate SAF is that it's open to many and myriad opinions. It's the kind of freewheeling, loud, raucous marketplace of ideas that a certain Founding Father and early President deemed so central to the liberal democracy that was created.

It's a rich and lively forum because of the diversity of input -- much of it helpful, some of it not, most of it well intended, a bit of it not. So many sources to read and learn from (or not), spanning veterans, alumni, parents, cadets, mids, applicants, aspirants, innocent bystanders, bacon lovers....

Those of us who've been here a long time and whose posts overflow the threads are usually the first ones to say:
"Caveat emptor!"
"The advice is free and you get what you pay for."
"Beware what you hear from anonymous sources in an online forum."
"When in doubt, or even when sure, go directly to the primary source."

That's what any sensible person presumably knows when trolling for input, feedback or information online. Want info? Prepare for it to be wrong. Want input? Prepare for more than you asked for. Want feedback? Prepare for criticism or disagreement. You take the bad with the good. And here, it's mainly good.

I, for one, love to hear many, various, opposing, overlapping, incriminating, provocative ideas. I trust myself to parse the good from the bad. Reading SAF challenges my own convictions and tests my own knowledge. I'll keep posting here, unabashedly and with positive intent. And I'll keep reading too because...well... it's enlightening and fun.

 

[TAMUMom1990]

I agree with some of the sentiment of the OP, especially about rude replies. Being rude and disrespectful is not consistent with any branch of the military.

But on a different note, our family considered this forum essential in the academy and ROTC application process because there simply is no other place to find such information, and therefore I wouldn’t recommend throwing the baby out with the bathwater. Obviously this is an anonymous forum, and people will post erroneous information. One must read the replies carefully, gleaning useful information and ignoring the rest. In addition, it is extremely useful to search for old threads and compare prior advice. When you read in such a way, you can often get a clearer picture of what you are trying to learn.

I am a parent of a kid who applied several years ago. The reason I come back is try to to offer advice to the current crop of candidates and their parents. I feel it is my duty to try to be helpful to others since so many people were helpful to us.

I couldn't agree more. We have received so much helpful information throughout the appointment/scholarship process from these forums, but the most valuable has been from current cadets who graciously share their time, experiences. wisdom and practical tips about what it is like once you get to SA. I feel like my DS will be that much more prepared because of it. While this forum has the kinds of negative things OP describes, it is so much more than that.

 

[MrMe]

Well, that was an interesting thread to read through.

My takeaway from this forum was I can find some information or data here free of charge that you can't necessarily find a whole lot of other places.

Read everything with a grain of salt. The answer to the majority of questions posted on this forum is "wait and see" anyway.

 

[Ivy22]

Some of the replies to the person asking about vegan boots crossed a line I think. The OP was asking a genuine question, looking for advice, and a lot of people just piled on them about their moral beliefs and how they don't belong in the military as a vegan. Like I said on that post, I've met plenty of vegan servicemembers, and they're doing just fine in the military. It's 2024 now, and times have changed.

I do think this forum is helpful most times. Every once in a while, I see one of *those* topics get posted, and I just think to myself "oh boy, here we go again".

 

[IggyMom23]

If a forum is a place of open discussion of opinions and ideas, I think that is what this is, right? I mean, it’s right in the name. I think it’s hard not to take things personally when you are younger. Being able to take or leave what people say and not let things get to you comes with age and maturity. And I say this meaning no disrespect to OP, who makes some valid points. Honestly, if I was an 18 year old kid and adults responded to my post the way I’ve seen here, I would have a strong reaction too, but probably in the way of freaking out crying and deleting my account. But now I’ve hit my “F-it 50’s” and things roll off my back pretty easily.

As far as why the older folks are still here…I can’t imagine a place where applicants need help or want to know things, and the only people on here were applicants going through the process. There are numerous invaluable members and posts here, but you just have to take what applies to you and let the rest go. I personally came on last year when my son was applying, and he and I for sure got info that was absolutely nowhere else, and support. I guess I come back to see how the new kiddos are doing because I remember how stressful it was and I would like to ease some of that if I can help. And I may have? To be honest, when I need a break from middle aged life, I’d rather do this than scroll other old people social media or play Candy Crush, and the bonus is I can look really thoughtful while doing it, and say “hold on, I’m working” when another adolescent needs me to find something for him that is where I said it was, and it’s right there, no, I’m literally looking at it, while reminding him he also has legs and eyes.

Also, as far as giving advice we have no business giving. Literally the advice is usually:

No one here can answer that

Don’t compare your stats to someone else

There is more to the process than XYZ

And also, NO ONE HERE CAN ANSWER THAT for ever and ever until eternity and beyond. And even when Cher and cockroaches have left the earth.

But to OP, I have absolutely cringed at some things on here, and don’t even look at threads I have no interest or knowledge on. I get where you are coming from and the visceral reaction you had, probably spurred by the vegan boot thing. I appreciate the empathy and inclusivity Gen Z has, but you just gotta sprinkle in a little Gen X “you talkin’ to me?” (Insert hand gesture).

 

[FortuneMaterial]

If a forum is a place of open discussion of opinions and ideas, I think that is what this is, right? I mean, it’s right in the name. I think it’s hard not to take things personally when you are younger. Being able to take or leave what people say and not let things get to you comes with age and maturity. And I say this meaning no disrespect to OP, who makes some valid points. Honestly, if I was an 18 year old kid and adults responded to my post the way I’ve seen here, I would have a strong reaction too, but probably in the way of freaking out crying and deleting my account. But now I’ve hit my “F-it 50’s” and things roll off my back pretty easily.

As far as why the older folks are still here…I can’t imagine a place where applicants need help or want to know things, and the only people on here were applicants going through the process. There are numerous invaluable members and posts here, but you just have to take what applies to you and let the rest go. I personally came on last year when my son was applying, and he and I for sure got info that was absolutely nowhere else, and support. I guess I come back to see how the new kiddos are doing because I remember how stressful it was and I would like to ease some of that if I can help. And I may have? To be honest, when I need a break from middle aged life, I’d rather do this than scroll other old people social media or play Candy Crush, and the bonus is I can look really thoughtful while doing it, and say “hold on, I’m working” when another adolescent needs me to find something for him that is where I said it was, and it’s right there, no, I’m literally looking at it, while reminding him he also has legs and eyes.

Also, as far as giving advice we have no business giving. Literally the advice is usually:

No one here can answer that

Don’t compare your stats to someone else

There is more to the process than XYZ

And also, NO ONE HERE CAN ANSWER THAT for ever and ever until eternity and beyond. And even when Cher and cockroaches have left the earth.

But to OP, I have absolutely cringed at some things on here, and don’t even look at threads I have no interest or knowledge on. I get where you are coming from and the visceral reaction you had, probably spurred by the vegan boot thing. I appreciate the empathy and inclusivity Gen Z has, but you just gotta sprinkle in a little Gen X “you talkin’ to me?” (Insert hand gesture).

sounds like your too old to be on these forums. Leave these for the cadets, Im pretty sure you are the person that the OP is talking about. Get some self awareness IGGYMom23