Personal Statement

A

anom

Co26 TWE Co27 Waitlistee/Rejectee
Joined
Dec 9, 2021
Messages
247
Hello everyone,

I am currently wrapping up my third application, and I am struggling on what to write about, since I clearly have no idea what works. I have heard that getting their attention with a story is a good idea, and I have heard that writing about being a 3 time applicant within NROTC would be a good idea.

Ideas:

Lessons learned from being a Sunday School Teacher, managing 20+ elementary school children and their unpredictability.

Saving a man who was unconscious from alcohol consumption on a Friday night run.

3 Time Applicant Idea

Talk about awards and leadership positions I have held, and how they have matured me.

Thank you all for your input over the course of the last 3 cycles. To those who are first time applicants, reach out with any questions. I have a lot of experience in the nomination area, as well as performing well in NROTC if that is what you decide.
 
The story about saving an unconscious man sounds like it could be turned into a great essay! My initial reaction is that that would make the best essay, but I'm a re-applicant too so what do I know.
 
Personally, I would write about being a three-time applicant, and the grit you possess in achieving this goal. Good luck!
Can you share why you would prefer USNA over your two years experience with NROTC?
 
Unlike most colleges, USNA isn't looking for something "out of the box" in the essays. They primarily are evaluating whether you can write something coherent using appropriate spelling, grammar, paragraph structure, etc. That's not to say that an interesting story isn't . . . well, more interesting . . . than a boring one. But a great essay isn't going to make the difference for USNA that it might for many other institutions of higher learning. And I can almost guarantee that your essay wasn't what led to lack of success with USNA in the past (assuming you can write coherently).

I would tell the story that you want to tell -- the one you've already written in your head. [Note: you also have the BGO interview to discuss grit, determination, etc. if you choose not to make an essay out of it.]
 
SeePower said:
Personally, I would write about being a three-time applicant, and the grit you possess in achieving this goal. Good luck!
Can you share why you would prefer USNA over your two years experience with NROTC?
Click to expand...
I didn't expect to reapply until I attended a conference up on the Yard, but when I got there I enjoyed every aspect. Plebe life isn't as bad as I thought, and I even attended a Calculus exam review with my friend who is a plebe, and the professor was amazing. I come from a Big 10 school, where there is a couple hundred people in many classes, where TA's teach everything. At the Academy the professor showed up at 2000 and answered every question. Ideally, I want to service select SEAL, and I think that is much more attainable there. I am already young for my class, and I am not really concerned about an extra 2 years of school, especially if I can validate a decent amount of classes. I've done really well in NROTC, but I've wanted to go to USNA for nearly a decade, and I can't give up on the dream.
 
anom said:
I didn't expect to reapply until I attended a conference up on the Yard, but when I got there I enjoyed every aspect. Plebe life isn't as bad as I thought, and I even attended a Calculus exam review with my friend who is a plebe, and the professor was amazing. I come from a Big 10 school, where there is a couple hundred people in many classes, where TA's teach everything. At the Academy the professor showed up at 2000 and answered every question. Ideally, I want to service select SEAL, and I think that is much more attainable there. I am already young for my class, and I am not really concerned about an extra 2 years of school, especially if I can validate a decent amount of classes. I've done really well in NROTC, but I've wanted to go to USNA for nearly a decade, and I can't give up on the dream.
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That right there sounds like the start to a great essay
 
On the first guided tour of the yard that I took with my 2020 LT. the guide mentioned a midshipman who got accepted on his 4th attempt and according to her the admissions office was impressed by his perseverance. My son who is class of 2025 is also a reapplicant. We live in the Annapolis area hence it is very competitive. My son wanted to run a marathon before he turned 18 and he ran it before he reapplied. After a lot of thought he wrote about the challenges he overcame to finish the marathon and the inner strength he had to find to finish the race and compared it to the grit and dedication it takes to be a successful naval officer. My 2020 used to volunteer with the habitat for humanity every summer and wrote her essay based upon the life lessons she learnt from volunteering and the lessons she learnt from people who live differently than how she brought up and the challenges they faced and to be a successful officer she has to face new challenges and accept them and find solutions. In my opinion which ever topic you choose to write on it is very important that you own the topic and write from your heart. Wishing you the best.
 
Personally i would write about how you're a 3 time applicant and how you managed getting rejected and what you have done to overcome this failure and better yourself to make you a more "fit" candidate. Amongst the other stuff, i have a few friends who have gotten appointed and i know a lot of naval officers all of them have told me to look at EVERYTHING as a learning opportunity, because you cant be a great midshipman/officer without learning from experiences.
 
anom said:
Hello everyone,

I am currently wrapping up my third application, and I am struggling on what to write about, since I clearly have no idea what works. I have heard that getting their attention with a story is a good idea, and I have heard that writing about being a 3 time applicant within NROTC would be a good idea.

Ideas:

Lessons learned from being a Sunday School Teacher, managing 20+ elementary school children and their unpredictability.

Saving a man who was unconscious from alcohol consumption on a Friday night run.

3 Time Applicant Idea

Talk about awards and leadership positions I have held, and how they have matured me.

Thank you all for your input over the course of the last 3 cycles. To those who are first time applicants, reach out with any questions. I have a lot of experience in the nomination area, as well as performing well in NROTC if that is what you decide.
Click to expand...
Recovery from repeated setbacks takes strategic thinking, action planning, goal-setting, innovative approaches, commitment, resilience, drive, determination, personal insight, perseverance and many other traits desirable in junior officers. Break down your why and how and help them see how you have intentionally and smartly attacked this summit yet again.
 
anom said:
I didn't expect to reapply until I attended a conference up on the Yard, but when I got there I enjoyed every aspect. Plebe life isn't as bad as I thought, and I even attended a Calculus exam review with my friend who is a plebe, and the professor was amazing. I come from a Big 10 school, where there is a couple hundred people in many classes, where TA's teach everything. At the Academy the professor showed up at 2000 and answered every question. Ideally, I want to service select SEAL, and I think that is much more attainable there. I am already young for my class, and I am not really concerned about an extra 2 years of school, especially if I can validate a decent amount of classes. I've done really well in NROTC, but I've wanted to go to USNA for nearly a decade, and I can't give up on the dream.
Click to expand...
Write about something that matters to you. Tell them why “it" matters to you. What have you’ve learned, given up, and fought for in service of/pursuit of this "meaningful thing". Then a few words on how this, “Meaningful Thing” and your experience with it elates to your raw potential as a Naval officer and your desire to serve your country. Write about what matters to you and your life experience……..not about what you think they wanna hear you say.

Example: At 17, the most important activity in DD’s life was rowing. DD’s personal statement began with a description of an oar stroke from the vantage point of a person rowing a skull. From there, on to what rowing ment to her; her struggles in the sport, the lessons she’d learned and what that experience had revealed to her about herself. Then on to why DD felt she belonged at USNA and in the Navy.
Maybe yours begins with I am at __________ in their ROTC program in (date) I attended a conference at USNA on (date) and…...(see Capt. MJ’s post above)

Just my put; kinda universal application advice. I’ve had some admissions board exp, but not with the USNA.

I love you guys who reapply. You WILL succeed. If not with USNA admissions, then in dozens of other challenges in your lives.

The world really needs smart, compassionate, driven people with, (and I mean this in the best possible way)…. a little Bluto Blutarski in em.




ABSOLUTE BEST OF LUCK TO YOU! and to all the other “Yossarians” who circle back through the flack for a second run over the target.

BTW: A thoughtful read of Capt. MJ’s last post suggests that you’ve already won/demonstrated some good stuff via your application process.
 
On the topic of re-application personal statements:

Is it a good idea to list out everything I've done on my re-application journey in the essay? Although I briefly touched on what I've done as a re-applicant, I spent most of the essay focusing on responding to the prompts, especially the "Describe a personal experience ... character development and integrity" part. I didn't go over each and every thing I've done as a re-applicant since I figured that would be restating what they can already see in my extra-curriculars section and in my BGO interview write-up. Thoughts?
 
navy/airforce-hopeful man said:
On the topic of re-application personal statements:

Is it a good idea to list out everything I've done on my re-application journey in the essay? Although I briefly touched on what I've done as a re-applicant, I spent most of the essay focusing on responding to the prompts, especially the "Describe a personal experience ... character development and integrity" part. I didn't go over each and every thing I've done as a re-applicant since I figured that would be restating what they can already see in my extra-curriculars section and in my BGO interview write-up. Thoughts?
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I just wrote mine, and its being reviewed by a personal friend who used to be a BGO, but I wrote about being rejected twice, and all the scenarios of being turned down or losing, and how it built my maturity, perseverance, and dedication. I can send if if you're interested.
 
anom said:
I just wrote mine, and its being reviewed by a personal friend who used to be a BGO, but I wrote about being rejected twice, and all the scenarios of being turned down or losing, and how it built my maturity, perseverance, and dedication. I can send if if you're interested.
Click to expand...
That's alright, but thank you for the offer.
 
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