Please Don't Be That Parent

Please pay attention and watch your posts. There are applicants on this thread who need us to be adults and to focus. My post above is in DIRECT RESPONSE TO THAT ONE APPLICANT'S POST. Read the blasted post by that applicant again. The kid has a nomination and has an ongoing, independent, well-established relationship with the admissions counselor. There is no way on this planet that this kid's application has been harmed by an excited mom making one phone call. ONE PHONE CALL after a long-established relationship has been built by an obviously well-qualified, extremely self-motivated and independent applicant. Because you couldn't restrain yourself from responding to me to make your point, you create additional anxiety for that applicant. Kudos to you. You win.

This is simple stuff, upon which nearly all of us agree. Can't you see that this entire thread is based on posters who are already in almost 100% agreement? We disagree here or there, largely in the tails of the distribution, so to speak. Parents - do your best to NOT call and do your best to encourage your youngin' to run this show. Does mom make one call or zero calls? Zero is better. Duh. I believe that one won't hurt the kid, you believe that one call WILL hurt the kid (although "not liking it" and penalizing the applicant for the parent's conduct are two different things entirely). That's a fine distinction that does not merit your meddling in the minds of teenaged applicants. There is so little disagreement on the fundamental point. (And guess what - I have made ONE call, for that plane ticket situation that I described earlier. That makes me pretty clean, arguing a position in theory, not for me personally.)
 
Here's $.25 OtB (I always made a point of overpaying Tecumseh). As a BGO, I am evaluating the Candidates interest and motivation, not the Parents. Someone once told me that time is not an excuse, as it is purely a function of priorities. While I am happy to talk about USNA, admissions process, life of a Midshipman and Naval Service with anxious parents, I expect that all coordination be directly with the Candidate.

For the Moms and Dads, I get it -- you want whats best for your kids. I have been through the College Admissions Roller Coaster for two daughters, and they didn't always appreciate my hands off approach, but both have graduated and are self sufficient now, and now recognize that I was right.

Finally, Parent's Clubs are another story. I think they are a great source of support for the Parents, particularly those that have trouble adapting to their DS/DD leaving home, or as an opportunity to bond with other parents in a similar. That being said, I have to laugh at the Commissioning Week guidebooks that Parents Clubs put out, with helpful hints like the admonition to make sure your Midshipman has enough time to get back to the Yard for scheduled events, since traffic can be unpredictable. If your Midshipman hasn't figured that out after 4 years, he /she isn't ready to serve as a Naval Officer.
 
Old Navy BGO said:
Here's $.25 OtB (I always made a point of overpaying Tecumseh). As a BGO, I am evaluating the Candidates interest and motivation, not the Parents. Someone once told me that time is not an excuse, as it is purely a function of priorities. While I am happy to talk about USNA, admissions process, life of a Midshipman and Naval Service with anxious parents, I expect that all coordination be directly with the Candidate.

For the Moms and Dads, I get it -- you want whats best for your kids. I have been through the College Admissions Roller Coaster for two daughters, and they didn't always appreciate my hands off approach, but both have graduated and are self sufficient now, and now recognize that I was right.

Finally, Parent's Clubs are another story. I think they are a great source of support for the Parents, particularly those that have trouble adapting to their DS/DD leaving home, or as an opportunity to bond with other parents in a similar. That being said
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LineInTheSand said:
He required parental consent prior to 17, right?

Not a huge hoop to jump through, though.
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DS did the admissions process all on his own and did not need parental consent until swearing in at age 17. We live on the west coast, and one thing that we did not think of was when we sent him off at the airport to report by himself, he was unable to get a hotel room in New York without a parent or adult guardian. Admissions was kind enough at the last minute to find a sponsor family to pick him up at the airport, give him a place to sleep, and drive him to the gate the next morning. So yes, there are some things they can't do themselves.
 
LineInTheSand said:
Sit in the passengers seat. Be there to keep them awake, share advice/stories, help with directions when needed, and give support.

Let your kid do the driving through the process..... it's his/her road trip.
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You can say that again!
 
I check in here every so often as my
second son is complete pending review and each time this thread is right at the top.
Quite frankly, this thread is not helpful and needs to disappear. As much as I appreciate these forums-this is the exact type of thread that will keep others away and parents frightened that their child could be harmed in some way by a phone call. It's so disheartening to see so many people judging others-people should feel free to call, not call, help, not help-this is America.
Is there any way for moderators to delete this or put it elsewhere so folks who are wondering about the process, can actually learn about the process of applying to a SA?
 
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