Second Thoughts

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navy27hopeful

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May 4, 2022
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Having just received an appointment a few days ago, I was immediately ecstatic and thrilled. I immediately accepted it. I have been committed to going to USNA since 8th grade and was so elated to receive an appointment. Now, as the immediate excitement wears off, I find myself dreading the entire idea of going. Nerves about PS and Plebe Year, worried about the service after, pretty much everything USNA encompasses I feel a sense of worry and dread towards. I find myself mentally making plans at civilian colleges, thinking what my life would be like etc. I have no way of knowing if this is just nerves or what. USNA has been my dream forever, completely my own idea too (not influenced by parents.) I am feeling like I got so caught up in the application process that I forgot to truly look at what it all meant. Anyone have similar experiences? Any advice or help is appreciated.
 
Don’t overthink it right now. You have been given an amazing opportunity but it is your decision. I don’t know if you have spoken to your parents but you don’t have to make an immediate decision. You officially have until you have to report to decide, and even then you can leave but it is a more complex process and may delay or effect other plans. I would suggest you speak with your BGO and explain ‘ ask questions about any concerns. See if you can connect with a current Plebe and ask questions. You may find that some of your concerns are lessened.

If after all is said and done you still have anxiety and don’t think it is the place you want yo be there are other commissioning options you can consider. You have to decide, having been offered an appointment, would you regret not trying to give it a go? On the other hand, if your heart is not into it will you have the desire to persevere through those first few rough months? The bottom line is - don’t make this decision in haste! Put similar effort into your decision to go as you did into your application. Admissions may also be able to answer questions or offer plebe contacts to reach out to that may help you make your final decision. If all else fails, do a search for the local / state USNA Parents Club / Association that may also be able to provide midshipmen contacts to ask questions. Good luck with your choice, I know you will weigh your options, investigate, and I am sure you will make the right decision for you!
 
MarTac said:
Don’t overthink it right now. You have been given an amazing opportunity but it is your decision. I don’t know if you have spoken to your parents but you don’t have to make an immediate decision. You officially have until you have to report to decide, and even then you can leave but it is a more complex process and may delay or effect other plans. I would suggest you speak with your BGO and explain ‘ ask questions about any concerns. See if you can connect with a current Plebe and ask questions. You may find that some of your concerns are lessened.

If after all is said and done you still have anxiety and don’t think it is the place you want yo be there are other commissioning options you can consider. You have to decide, having been offered an appointment, would you regret not trying to give it a go? On the other hand, if your heart is not into it will you have the desire to persevere through those first few rough months? The bottom line is - don’t make this decision in haste! Put similar effort into your decision to go as you did into your application. Admissions may also be able to answer questions or offer plebe contacts to reach out to that may help you make your final decision. If all else fails, do a search for the local / state USNA Parents Club / Association that may also be able to provide midshipmen contacts to ask questions. Good luck with your choice, I know you will weigh your options, investigate, and I am sure you will make the right decision for you!
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Thank you, this is good advice, I will be sure to think clearly and weigh all my options. I think I may have gotten caught up with the prestige and idea of the academy itself and neglected the commitment as a whole. I will be sure to re-evaluate and take time to really think about everything now that I am not focused on the appointment.
 
Did you attend a CVW? There are several in the new year. That would give you the opportunity to experience USNA first hand and talk to mids in every year of the process. They are very honest and a great resource. Definitely give the decision some time and space. Changing your mind is an option and something to consider fully. This is a huge decision point in your life and there are many good answers, but only you can determine the right one.
 
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USMCfam said:
Did you attend a CVW? There are several in the new year. That would give you the opportunity to experience USNA first hand and talk to mids in every year of the process. They are very honest and a great resource. Definitely five the decision some time and space. Changing your mind is an option and something to consider fully. This is a huge decision point in your life and there are many good answers, but only you can determine the right one.
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I did attend a CVW. I really enjoyed the USNA environment, the camaraderie and etc. I do think I could be happy and succeed at the academy, but I think my concerns are more focused towards the service after. I think I'll do some more deep research and soul-searching throughout the break.
 
One other thought…. I don’t know what your individual interests are or career desires after but you might look into USMMA. You can commission into active duty in ANY service after graduation OR none at all and remaining Naval Reserves and work in the maritime industry either shoreside or onboard ships. Graduates of this federal service academy have some of the highest paying jobs after graduation (due to their unlimited USCG license.) Depending on your state and congressional district there may be unused nominations and you might be able to get your congressional office to give you one as you consider your options and fill out your USMMA application. It is still a federal service academy and 100% free for appointments without the military “active duty” obligation after graduation. If you find you do like the Navy Reserve you could always try to change to active duty later- if you wanted to. Although military in nature, it more resembles ROTC with a concentration on merchant marine skills. This still might be an option, this year, if you were to desire and work fast…. Just another option if you like sea service / maritime - you may have already considered.
 
My advice would be to sleep on it. Take the time afforded to you to do more research and think about your options.

You have a great opportunity, but it only works if you can see yourself at the end of a long hard slog of SA crud. And can envision yourself leading men and women in uniform.
 
Seems to me like you and I are in the same boat. It's been my dream since I entered high school. I told everyone I met about it. And then, I received that "shiny" appointment email, and I was so thrilled I couldn't stop smiling the entire day. I announced it to all my friends and gained so much support. I'm starting to realize that maybe I was fantasizing over the idea of attending rather than the actual concept. So it took some time to sit down and say "okay I'm actually doing this because I want to go through with it, not because I want to impress people."
The academy is my dream. I can't wait. But I do worry about homesickness. I do worry about not meeting my expectations. I worry I will fail. I worry I will be at the bottom of my class. But I think I'll come to realize that it's part of the process. Over a thousand young men and women graduate each year, many of whom were probably thinking "what the heck did I get myself into?" when they went to sleep their first night of PS. It's a process. It's meant to be difficult. That's why the application process is so lengthy. That's why it's so selective. The academy would not have picked you if they didn't think you could do it.
Just think of how many people wish they could be in your shoes, having an appointment before Christmas. Or even having an appointment at all. But also remember that it's your choice. If you say "no", someone else will be glad to have your spot.
No matter what you decide, someone will support you. And if you choose to go through with it...see you there, shipmate!
 
keymaster_479 said:
Seems to me like you and I are in the same boat. It's been my dream since I entered high school. I told everyone I met about it. And then, I received that "shiny" appointment email, and I was so thrilled I couldn't stop smiling the entire day. I announced it to all my friends and gained so much support. I'm starting to realize that maybe I was fantasizing over the idea of attending rather than the actual concept. So it took some time to sit down and say "okay I'm actually doing this because I want to go through with it, not because I want to impress people."
The academy is my dream. I can't wait. But I do worry about homesickness. I do worry about not meeting my expectations. I worry I will fail. I worry I will be at the bottom of my class. But I think I'll come to realize that it's part of the process. Over a thousand young men and women graduate each year, many of whom were probably thinking "what the heck did I get myself into?" when they went to sleep their first night of PS. It's a process. It's meant to be difficult. That's why the application process is so lengthy. That's why it's so selective. The academy would not have picked you if they didn't think you could do it.
Just think of how many people wish they could be in your shoes, having an appointment before Christmas. Or even having an appointment at all. But also remember that it's your choice. If you say "no", someone else will be glad to have your spot.
No matter what you decide, someone will support you. And if you choose to go through with it...see you there, shipmate!
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Good to know others are in the same boat. Maybe it's just a part of the process after such a long time dreaming of going and applying.
 
MarTac said:
One other thought…. I don’t know what your individual interests are or career desires after but you might look into USMMA. You can commission into active duty in ANY service after graduation OR none at all and remaining Naval Reserves and work in the maritime industry either shoreside or onboard ships. Graduates of this federal service academy have some of the highest paying jobs after graduation (due to their unlimited USCG license.) Depending on your state and congressional district there may be unused nominations and you might be able to get your congressional office to give you one as you consider your options and fill out your USMMA application. It is still a federal service academy and 100% free for appointments without the military “active duty” obligation after graduation. If you find you do like the Navy Reserve you could always try to change to active duty later- if you wanted to. Although military in nature, it more resembles ROTC with a concentration on merchant marine skills. This still might be an option, this year, if you were to desire and work fast…. Just another option if you like sea service / maritime - you may have already considered.
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I will look into the Merchant Marines ASAP and weigh my options. May be the best of both worlds
 
alindy said:
Having just received an appointment a few days ago, I was immediately ecstatic and thrilled. I immediately accepted it. I have been committed to going to USNA since 8th grade and was so elated to receive an appointment. Now, as the immediate excitement wears off, I find myself dreading the entire idea of going. Nerves about PS and Plebe Year, worried about the service after, pretty much everything USNA encompasses I feel a sense of worry and dread towards. I find myself mentally making plans at civilian colleges, thinking what my life would be like etc. I have no way of knowing if this is just nerves or what. USNA has been my dream forever, completely my own idea too (not influenced by parents.) I am feeling like I got so caught up in the application process that I forgot to truly look at what it all meant. Anyone have similar experiences? Any advice or help is appreciated.
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Whether or not they admit it, you are experiencing what every Midshipman has gone through. It's that, "Oh, Man... The s#$t's now got real" moment.

This is a decision for you and only you to make. Just keep in mind... If USNA offered you an appointment, they believe you belong and will be successful. They do not take the appointment process lightly. Now it is up to you to believe the same.
 
Go back and read the essays you wrote. Who is that person? Someone you know? Or not. Was it all BS, something you put together just to see if you could score a USNA appointment? Or not.

One “adulting” fact going forward: You will seldom have 100% of the information you think you need or want to make decisions. You will have to rely on brain, heart and gut to make a decision, accepting there is risk involved.

Keep in mind if you report for I-Day, then you are not immediately heading off to do 5 years of service after that. You have the entire first two years to learn about that and see if that path is right for you. If it’s not, you can walk away with no obligation, a nice transcript in hand, having given it a fair trial.

You can decline your appointment at any time after you have accepted it. You can even simply not show up at Induction Day, though that is definitely tacky. Take this time to think through the main question: do you want to serve as an officer in the Navy or Marine Corps?

I recognize 4 years at USNA and a minimum of 5 years after that seem like a lifetime to someone your age. Please trust me when I say you are not teetering at grave’s edge at 26-27 if you get out after your initial obligation.

You live your life 1 moment at a time. You do not know how your journey will unfold. Taking that first step is sometimes the hardest.

Sit on this some more, but you could also contact Admissions, tell them you are struggling a bit with your decision, ask for another CVW. If they say yes and you can swing it, come prepared to talk to mids, especially upperclass, with thoughtful questions on decisions to serve, etc., everything that is weighing on you.

The last year or so you have probably desperately wanted to be treated like an adult and no longer a kid by parents and family. Welcome to adult decisions!
 
.
Reach out to USNA Graduate Alumni & BGO’s in your area for some quality “Q&A” …

You’ll see 1st hand the fine product that USNA produces … there are no irregular pegs and there is no shoveling the s#%!
.
 
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Nerves are normal. Period.

However, your comment about not wanting to serve is what jumped out to me. If you don’t want to ultimately SERVE? The 4 years won’t matter.

You (both posters) were picked bc USNA thinks you can make it through the 4 years, and have the potential to be a leader as an Officer. But, the SA cannot see your true desire to serve afterwards.

You have the first two years to decide. You will be immersed in the military way, and exposed to fantastic opportunities of your post commissioning Service community via summer trainings. Specifically PROTRAMID. We are not a military family, and despite searching around the internet, my guys couldn’t have know what fleet life truly is. My Ensign is super happy. My ANG oldest loves the Air Force. And my Mid is super excited about his future. But none of them could have known, without jumping in.

Any of my boys will chat with you, if that would be helpful. PM me if you are interested.

Nerves and questioning ‘what am I doing’ is normal. I would suspect you would have similar thoughts about whatever you end up doing. Leaving the nest is scary/exciting all at the same time. No matter where you go. And even more so at a SA. You are starting your own adult life. Chapter #2!!
 
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As usual, the sages of SAF have answered the call!!! Solid advice all around. I think you are coming to terms with achieving something you’ve worked very hard for. It is normal to ask if it’s the right decision and if USNA and serving will be like you think it is. That shows you really are invested in making the right choice. Decisions in the adult world all have their pros and cons. They also have the unknown. Sure, civilian colleges might sound nice now, but what if unemployment spikes when you graduate? You might be job searching for a bit. The same goes for USNA. What if the strategic power competition goes hot? We don’t know.

I’ll say this much. I am very happy I attended USNA and all my friends are too. No regrets at all. And I had my “Oh no” moment during 2/C Year. I was coming off a bad training (we didn’t do much on the training so that meant a lot of downtime to think). 2 for 7s we’re around the corner and I wasn’t in a good headspace. Was I ever seriously close to leaving? No, but I asked myself a lot if I really wanted to serve. I had another similar experience after a rough week in flight school. What I learned is that when you have a lot of time, thoughts will consume you. When you have a lot of thoughts (and maybe a negative experience to add to those thoughts), you are not in a good mental headspace to make a decision.

People don’t change overnight. You are the same person you were before you got your appointment. If it felt right before, I feel like you should try things out. Nobody has ill feelings toward someone who shows up, tries their best, but they realize it’s not for them. All the respect in the world for stepping in the arena.

On the service front, I have an absolute blast going to work every day. 2.5 years has flown by. Uncle Sam will ask you to do some really cool stuff and see some really neat places. I also can’t think of any other career path where a young 20-something can make decisions that can influence the world! That same career path will yell at you for having a rice cooker in your room 😂!

P.S. USNA and Plebe Summer/Plebe Year are not like the Fleet. Don’t think that all the games and getting yelled out for random stuff will be your life post graduation.
 
Usnavy2019 said:
As usual, the sages of SAF have answered the call!!! Solid advice all around. I think you are coming to terms with achieving something you’ve worked very hard for. It is normal to ask if it’s the right decision and if USNA and serving will be like you think it is. That shows you really are invested in making the right choice. Decisions in the adult world all have their pros and cons. They also have the unknown. Sure, civilian colleges might sound nice now, but what if unemployment spikes when you graduate? You might be job searching for a bit. The same goes for USNA. What if the strategic power competition goes hot? We don’t know.

I’ll say this much. I am very happy I attended USNA and all my friends are too. No regrets at all. And I had my “Oh no” moment during 2/C Year. I was coming off a bad training (we didn’t do much on the training so that meant a lot of downtime to think). 2 for 7s we’re around the corner and I wasn’t in a good headspace. Was I ever seriously close to leaving? No, but I asked myself a lot if I really wanted to serve. I had another similar experience after a rough week in flight school. What I learned is that when you have a lot of time, thoughts will consume you. When you have a lot of thoughts (and maybe a negative experience to add to those thoughts), you are not in a good mental headspace to make a decision.

People don’t change overnight. You are the same person you were before you got your appointment. If it felt right before, I feel like you should try things out. Nobody has ill feelings toward someone who shows up, tries their best, but they realize it’s not for them. All the respect in the world for stepping in the arena.

On the service front, I have an absolute blast going to work every day. 2.5 years has flown by. Uncle Sam will ask you to do some really cool stuff and see some really neat places. I also can’t think of any other career path where a young 20-something can make decisions that can influence the world! That same career path will yell at you for having a rice cooker in your room 😂!

P.S. USNA and Plebe Summer/Plebe Year are not like the Fleet. Don’t think that all the games and getting yelled out for random stuff will be your life post graduation.
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Brilliant.
 
I read the rice cooker comment to my 2/C. He said no truer words were ever spoken. Cracked me up.
 
Thank you everyone for the stellar advice and input. After reflecting on everything this morning (with a clear, rested mind,) I realized I was just taken aback by the sudden appointment, having not expected anything until the Spring time. I feel just as committed to serving and being a Mid as I was when I opened my application, I just needed to allow the reality of the appointment to sink in and make sure I was in it for the right reasons. Again, this forum always provides great advice and perspectives, truly a great community.
 
Usnavy2019 said:
As usual, the sages of SAF have answered the call!!! Solid advice all around. I think you are coming to terms with achieving something you’ve worked very hard for. It is normal to ask if it’s the right decision and if USNA and serving will be like you think it is. That shows you really are invested in making the right choice. Decisions in the adult world all have their pros and cons. They also have the unknown. Sure, civilian colleges might sound nice now, but what if unemployment spikes when you graduate? You might be job searching for a bit. The same goes for USNA. What if the strategic power competition goes hot? We don’t know.

I’ll say this much. I am very happy I attended USNA and all my friends are too. No regrets at all. And I had my “Oh no” moment during 2/C Year. I was coming off a bad training (we didn’t do much on the training so that meant a lot of downtime to think). 2 for 7s we’re around the corner and I wasn’t in a good headspace. Was I ever seriously close to leaving? No, but I asked myself a lot if I really wanted to serve. I had another similar experience after a rough week in flight school. What I learned is that when you have a lot of time, thoughts will consume you. When you have a lot of thoughts (and maybe a negative experience to add to those thoughts), you are not in a good mental headspace to make a decision.

People don’t change overnight. You are the same person you were before you got your appointment. If it felt right before, I feel like you should try things out. Nobody has ill feelings toward someone who shows up, tries their best, but they realize it’s not for them. All the respect in the world for stepping in the arena.

On the service front, I have an absolute blast going to work every day. 2.5 years has flown by. Uncle Sam will ask you to do some really cool stuff and see some really neat places. I also can’t think of any other career path where a young 20-something can make decisions that can influence the world! That same career path will yell at you for having a rice cooker in your room 😂!

P.S. USNA and Plebe Summer/Plebe Year are not like the Fleet. Don’t think that all the games and getting yelled out for random stuff will be your life post graduation.
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Another MOST EXCELLENT post!!

Readers, talk to people who have been through a SA. Bc talking to those currently in the SA don’t have the same perspective of their service reality, yet. They haven’t been out there yet!!

One thing my Ensign said at one point, that’s always stick with me, was ‘mom I’m shooting big guns off a ship in Bahrain this summer. My high school peers are drinking a playing ping in their basements. They are sure jealous!’

Similar to @Usnavy2019 ‘s post, my guys have done REALLY cool stuff and met REALLY cool people (talked to an astronaut. Wow).

I would always recommend to give it a try. You have the chops to do it. Now you have to show yourself that you can, too. Both of my guys are amazed at the things they have done, growth they have achieved, leaders they have learned from, and what their cuties hold.

Read @Usnavy2019 ’s post again. They are right.

👏 👏 👏
 
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