We were just discussing some of these issues/questions with our P2B. So, if a grandparent should die during Plebe summer do we even notify DS? Sounds like he would not be allowed to attend funeral? Appreciate input from those in the know as these are certainly possibilities in our family.
Wedding Pickle
- Thread starter Navy Lion
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The answer to that is it would be situational dependent. The mission at the time drives all related decisions. That doesn't necessarily equate to the needs of the service in a lot of cases but rather quite often mearly the needs of the unit. It often makes little sense from an individual standpoint but standing back and looking at the larger picture, perspectives change as do the situations. Basically, nobody here could or probably would answer that with a definitive yes or no.
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It is not likely during PS, but that is my opinion. It all depends on current policy, the leadership at the time, and circumstances.
As far as breaking the news, you’d call the USNA Chaplains’ office. They would swing into action, notify the right people in the chain of command, bring the plebe to a quiet place, break the news, have a phone and tissues and a bottled water ready, have an action plan all coordinated. Military chaplains in general are phenomenal, and the USNA ones are carefully chosen. Faith group doesn’t matter. They are there to support and comfort, regardless of plebe’s beliefs or non-beliefs.
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The Navy has a great system for dealing with these situations, and like most things at USNA-there is an action plan for every contingency (and when there is no specific plan, some bright young LT's who figure out how to handle problems). I recall my days as Command Duty Officer in my squadron --the aircrew had duty all week , and the crew Mission Commander was CDO all week. With a Squadron of 350+, ranging in age from 18-40's, it seemed like I got one death in the family call per duty cycle.
I would agree it is unlikely that a Plebe would be released from Plebe Summer to attend a grandparent funeral , unless a loco parentis situation. This thread just made me realize that I only made it to one of my grandparents funerals (and that one after I left the Navy), The most memorable was arriving at a Munich Germany BOQ on a German Study tour the summer of my first class year, and having a message from Dad waiting at the check in office that simply said that my grandfather had died, and suggesting I hoist a beer in his memory. (I did!). That one could have been delivered a lot more tactfully , so if you are worried about the delivery call Main Office or the Chaplains Office , and they can handle it.
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I thought that this thread was going to describe some old family tradition of gifting a pickle to the newlyweds.
Look, don't laugh! In our family a green pickle ornament is hidden on one of seven (yes, 7) Christmas trees on two different floors of the house.
The first one to find the pickle gets a five dollar bill. Competition is fierce.
Only in America.
Look, don't laugh! In our family a green pickle ornament is hidden on one of seven (yes, 7) Christmas trees on two different floors of the house.
The first one to find the pickle gets a five dollar bill. Competition is fierce.
Only in America.
Islandmom4
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We have discussed this with my 2020 mid several times: during PS, during ac year, while in summer cruise, etc. She has told us for each “phase” how she wants us to handle notifying her of situations: death of immediate family, death of grandparent, death of other family/friends, death of pets, serious illness/injury, etc, etc. I went a little overboard, but I know her wishes and have respected them (except for one family suicide that appeared on social media quickly).
Thank you all for the advise...
My original post was : "My DS is USNA incoming class of 2022. His sister is getting married on September 22, 2018. Any advise regarding him requesting liberty for the wedding night? We are a 4 hour 15 minute drive from Annapolis so he only needs about 24 hours of liberty. Does he have a shot at making the wedding?"
In summary:
- it will be a close call made tougher due to the timing (early in the plebe academic year).
- he needs to make his best first impression and have a good reputation to even have a chance.
- the chit needs to be submitted very early once the ac year starts.
- it may help if we can figure out a way to reduce the time away.
- we should probably have a plan "B" ready.
Thanks again to all who weighed in.
My original post was : "My DS is USNA incoming class of 2022. His sister is getting married on September 22, 2018. Any advise regarding him requesting liberty for the wedding night? We are a 4 hour 15 minute drive from Annapolis so he only needs about 24 hours of liberty. Does he have a shot at making the wedding?"
In summary:
- it will be a close call made tougher due to the timing (early in the plebe academic year).
- he needs to make his best first impression and have a good reputation to even have a chance.
- the chit needs to be submitted very early once the ac year starts.
- it may help if we can figure out a way to reduce the time away.
- we should probably have a plan "B" ready.
Thanks again to all who weighed in.
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I thought that this thread was going to describe some old family tradition of gifting a pickle to the newlyweds.
Look, don't laugh! In our family a green pickle ornament is hidden on one of seven (yes, 7) Christmas trees on two different floors of the house.
The first one to find the pickle gets a five dollar bill. Competition is fierce.
Only in America.
We hide a pickle ornament too. Such a fun tradition in our family!!
Navy Lion, one thing to think about is the ride to and from USNA. I know what wedding weekends can be like and obviously it’s a huge weekend for your family. Knowing how Navy paperwork can take it’s time, your DS might not get an answer until a day or two ahead of time. With how jam packed a wedding day can be, it might be a good idea to have whoever is gonna make that trek from home to USNA sort of on stand by for the decision. I had a Plebe in this situation back in the day. I think an uncle came and got him for the 2 your ride home, an upper class lended him choker whites (they hadn’t been issued yet to the Plebes), and then another family member brought him back that night. Good luck to your DS and your DD on the upcoming nuptials.
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Excellent executive summary. Stay flexible and imaginative - and tolerant of military culture. Your DS will start spouting military jargon and talking about baffling things soon enough. Thanks for your patience as we answered your question, dove down a holiday tree pickle rabbit hole or two. It’s the nature of these boards, and the whimsy factor can be very apparent sometimes.
NavyHoops - thanks for the tips about the ride and the choker whites. I figured they wouldn't be issued any dress uniforms by then so that should help.
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I haven't read every single post regarding this topic, so I hope I am not cross-posting, but I would recommend having DS submit a plan with the special request chit. What is DS going to do to account for the missed time? CaptMJ, NavyHoops, usna1985, and others have articulated the factors that might go into the decision making, but having a game plan for the company officer to review shows that someone is proactive, has put some thought into the entire situation, and is serious about attending the event AND still being set up for success, both in the classroom and other areas (i.e. plebe professional quizzes, etc.). For most significant immediate family functions USNA and the military try to accommodate, however, as stated multiple times above....there are no guarantees.
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Now that the wedding pickle liberty chit is figured out, I have a death in the family story.
My ship pulled into Portsmouth England and I took a tour bus to London where for the health of the crew, felt a need to inspect numerous pubs for sanitation and quality and quantity of the beer. On the way back to the pier after drinking all day, I found a pay phone and somehow was able to connect with my wife at home.
This was before the day of email. My wife asked if I had received the letter about Rosco dying. I said, what, dying, what? Apparently a chaplain notification isn't appropriate when your dog dies. She told me my dog Rosco died and I started crying like a baby. I later blamed my blubbering on the day of beer inspections but if there was ever a case for having a man if the cloth present, this was it.
My ship pulled into Portsmouth England and I took a tour bus to London where for the health of the crew, felt a need to inspect numerous pubs for sanitation and quality and quantity of the beer. On the way back to the pier after drinking all day, I found a pay phone and somehow was able to connect with my wife at home.
This was before the day of email. My wife asked if I had received the letter about Rosco dying. I said, what, dying, what? Apparently a chaplain notification isn't appropriate when your dog dies. She told me my dog Rosco died and I started crying like a baby. I later blamed my blubbering on the day of beer inspections but if there was ever a case for having a man if the cloth present, this was it.
Great point usnabgo08! It's always a good idea when you present problem to also present the solution.
Updated executive summary:
- it will be a close call made tougher due to the timing (early in the plebe academic year).
- he needs to make his best first impression and have a good reputation to even have a chance.
- the chit needs to be submitted very early once the ac year starts.
- the chit should include a plan to make up the lost time.
- it may help if we can figure out a way to reduce the time away.
- we should probably have a plan "B" ready.
I am a cadet at USAFA and I have a dear friend at USNA. Both of us have to do similar paperwork to travel for family events. The paperwork has to be turned in early since He will be a plebe but as long as it is described as a once in a life time event, which it is he can get permission to leave and will be granted permission to miss training if there is any that particular Saturday.