I think I'm middle-of-the-road in terms of engagement, in Army parlance I perform "Bounding Overwatch" while my son engages in the close quarters stuff. Being a retired SNCO I find myself following the USAF OJT model, I try to make sure he takes responsibility for himself - both here and in pursuit of his education and future career. We operate as a team, he is primarily responsible for things such as applications (to all his school choices - not just the USAFA), EC's, being where he's supposed to be and when, etc. He has about 75% ownership of all these processes (including the occasional AW SHUCKS). I try to provide input, guidance, and QC when needed.
I think that, due to the complexity of these things nowadays - the USAFA application alone takes a year - not counting the 4 other schools he's applied to, testing, schoolwork (poor kid's taking almost a full university classload in ADDITION to 4 AP and Honors high school courses) 4 hours a day of football until 2 weeks ago, etc, requires a 2 seat training airframe and an extra pair of eyes (one heads down, one heads up) IMO, but with the clear understanding over who actually has the stick - there's just so much to do and so much that can get lost in the cracks with this many moving parts. It's insane what top flight kids have to go through today just to launch - It sure wasn't that way when I was that age in the 70's - I'm not sure it's a good thing either, often staying up till 2:30 am just to get homework done.
I tell him "Hang in there Buddy, it'll all be worth it" I know I'm right and so does he, but sometimes I think he'd rather just chuck it all and become a beach bum in Hawaii!!!. Being a first generation college graduate myself, I know the value of education and of having someone to guide and help you through the process (I didn't). However, for many parents (and I know plenty of them), I think they lose sight of the boundaries and keep acting as the IP well past the point the Kid should have soloed. It's done with the best of intentions but ultimately, I believe it hurts the youngster and keeps them from developing their full potential - failure is a great learning experience and should be experienced often enough to act as a tool for growth - if they're willing to accept responsibility for it - and THAT"S another thread...
In the end run, if taken in the right manner, adversity will make them stronger and more resilient- that's why I believe parents should know when to back off. Like my career field motto reads: The Strong Shall Stand... But I still hate to see my son who's an exceptionally motivated young man dead to the world and facedown in the middle of his books at 2:30 am, that's the Dad in me...
Best Regards
Romad
I think that, due to the complexity of these things nowadays - the USAFA application alone takes a year - not counting the 4 other schools he's applied to, testing, schoolwork (poor kid's taking almost a full university classload in ADDITION to 4 AP and Honors high school courses) 4 hours a day of football until 2 weeks ago, etc, requires a 2 seat training airframe and an extra pair of eyes (one heads down, one heads up) IMO, but with the clear understanding over who actually has the stick - there's just so much to do and so much that can get lost in the cracks with this many moving parts. It's insane what top flight kids have to go through today just to launch - It sure wasn't that way when I was that age in the 70's - I'm not sure it's a good thing either, often staying up till 2:30 am just to get homework done.
I tell him "Hang in there Buddy, it'll all be worth it" I know I'm right and so does he, but sometimes I think he'd rather just chuck it all and become a beach bum in Hawaii!!!. Being a first generation college graduate myself, I know the value of education and of having someone to guide and help you through the process (I didn't). However, for many parents (and I know plenty of them), I think they lose sight of the boundaries and keep acting as the IP well past the point the Kid should have soloed. It's done with the best of intentions but ultimately, I believe it hurts the youngster and keeps them from developing their full potential - failure is a great learning experience and should be experienced often enough to act as a tool for growth - if they're willing to accept responsibility for it - and THAT"S another thread...
In the end run, if taken in the right manner, adversity will make them stronger and more resilient- that's why I believe parents should know when to back off. Like my career field motto reads: The Strong Shall Stand... But I still hate to see my son who's an exceptionally motivated young man dead to the world and facedown in the middle of his books at 2:30 am, that's the Dad in me...
Best Regards
Romad
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