12 quit on I-Day

[jiller59]

Certainly there are some kids that go for their parents/families instead of themselves.

So maybe we just need to remember that part of being young means sometimes not being able/willing change course until the very last minute.

I agree that there are a variety of reasons that some young people will pursue this path and then drop out. I didn't mean to imply that this person was trying to live up to parental expectations, but it is a real phenomenon in the lives of many young people. Other things that come to mind in addition to your comments above: the "prestige" of acceptance to an Academy, lack of understanding of the commitment, and lack of understanding of their own abilities/desires.

This mother's heart is still sad for the tears though.

 

[USAFA83GradWife]

Awww, this makes me feel like crying; poor kid. In many cases I don't think parents realize the pressure they are putting on their kids (yes, I am a parent and speak from experience). Some kids won't speak their minds to their parents until they come to a breaking point.

My DD threw up on I-day last week at USAFA - right by the big tent where the General was giving a speech. She was stressed about leaving home, not about the decision to attend. Poor thing. We blamed it on altitude. There just isn't much air up there in CO.

Mom to DD, USAFA Basic Cadet 2018

 

[jiller59]

My DD threw up on I-day last week at USAFA - right by the big tent where the General was giving a speech. She was stressed about leaving home, not about the decision to attend. Poor thing. We blamed it on altitude. There just isn't much air up there in CO.

Mom to DD, USAFA Basic Cadet 2018

Altitude sickness is awful-gives me a splitting headache

 

[wmbns]

I often get the sense that many of the parents lose sight of the fact that it is their son or daughter doing this and not the parent. It is great to support them, but not to the extent that they are being pushed into something that they might not really want.

Couldn't agree more. I keep telling my DD who attended NASS a few weeks back, "make sure it's what you want to do, not what everyone else wants for you."

 

[LineInTheSand]

My DD threw up on I-day last week at USAFA - right by the big tent where the General was giving a speech. She was stressed about leaving home, not about the decision to attend. Poor thing. We blamed it on altitude. There just isn't much air up there in CO.

Mom to DD, USAFA Basic Cadet 2018

Ohhhhh.... the stories begin. When i was a swab at CGA we had canteens and we had to drink the entire thing, now and then (drinking water was a must, no AC in the barracks and CT summers can get hot).... Now and then as we would finish you would hear "BWAAAAHHHH" and a splashing noise..... which of course you would want to ask about later "who was it". The best part was being across from your classmate as they ditched their latest water binge.

Enjoy the stories. My parents never get tired of hearing about the time I "pooped" on my hat (cover). It's funny now.... but man was it bad then. My cover was tucked into the back of my shorts. We were learning how to wear shirt stays, and that was my main concern as I sat for a quick "break." But when i got up and looked down.... my world was momentarily rocked.

 

[XTRA]

Post deleted -- language was insulting to other members

 

[XTRA]

umh wow

 

[LineInTheSand]

Post deleted as it responds to post that has been removed by mods.

 

[USAFA83GradWife]

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[XTRA]

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[trackandfield08]

Post partially deleted by mods because it responded to a post that has been removed by mods.

To those who reported in and have stayed so far, congrats! Work hard and enjoy the ride! You won't believe me until you're there, but four years fly by.

 

[nothingventurednothinggai]

This is a week (I Day at all the schools) where grads have some laughs, remembering their adventures, and embarrassments, and also make some fun of the new Plebes/Mids, etc. And then lots of people start posting about lack of commitment, the youth today, etc.

For the High School Juniors out there, I do know a number of kids who 'went for their parents', fell in love with service, and made as many as 4 Stars. I also know 3rd generation Flag kids who were huah, and quit. You do not go, period, if you cannot imagine committing 9 years of your life to something that is old, traditional, and bigger than yourself. That seems like forever at 17.

You have to be willing to be a servant for 9 years, but you are not signing up to servitude. Independent thinking is highly valued in the 21st century US Military.

On the other hand, a 27 year old 03 is barely a pup in the long life that comes after. So just because your parents think this is a cool path, doesn't mean it is. It also doesn't mean it isn't. My limited experience is the kids who do well see this as a long road, but also a path to a high perch where lots of paths present themselves, also at a very young age.

 

[2018USNA]

I was surprised at how many families did not have a military background. The military family Midshipmen have a much better understanding of what's coming during the summer and are better prepared to suck-it-up and keep moving towards the end goal. The non-military folks had shocked expressions on their faces most of the day.

I was very impressed at how efficiently the ceremony was conducted. Having sat through many change of commands and retirement ceremonies lasting greater than an hour, it was nice to see a 15 minute ceremony that will be remembered better than any of those long winded events.

 

[LongAgoPlebe]

I was surprised at how many families did not have a military background. The military family Midshipmen have a much better understanding of what's coming during the summer and are better prepared to suck-it-up and keep moving towards the end goal. The non-military folks had shocked expressions on their faces most of the day.

I was very impressed at how efficiently the ceremony was conducted. Having sat through many change of commands and retirement ceremonies lasting greater than an hour, it was nice to see a 15 minute ceremony that will be remembered better than any of those long winded events.

I'm sure that's so, but coming from a military family can cut both ways. A former classmate went as a legacy (dad, one grandfather USNA & one USMA, uncle in there somewhere) but separated during his youngster year because he realized he did not want to be an officer in the USN. I realize that is merely an anecdote. I'm sure that USNA, and probably DoD, collects data about sources of attrition. In fact I seem to remember someone posting a link at one time to a Masters thesis from the mid-90s on predictors of attrition. Be interesting to see whether this is a predictor.

 

[nigel]

... Believe all 250 USCGA Swabs made it through R day on Monday...

OrionT, are you sure about this? After we said goodbye to our swab, we stopped and chatted with some other parents. The mother said her swab just told them that her roommate had quit and was packing up her things to leave.

Do Cadre (or someone else?) try to convince these kids to stick it out?

Nicole

 

[trackandfield08]

OrionT, are you sure about this? After we said goodbye to our swab, we stopped and chatted with some other parents. The mother said her swab just told them that her roommate had quit and was packing up her things to leave.

Do Cadre (or someone else?) try to convince these kids to stick it out?

Nicole

I can't provide anyone with the USNA perspective but from the USCGA perspective, yes there is an attempt to convince them to stick it out. It first occurs with the cadre but will eventually be handled by the Company Commander, Company Executive Officer, and the Company Chief. However, before the Swearing-In Ceremony, the process to leave is much easier. You just pack your stuff and go. Plus, if I'm going to be honest, those who want to leave in the first few minutes/hours never really want it for themselves.

After the Swearing-In Ceremony, it takes about a week to outprocess because now that you've taken the oath and signed the contract, there is a lot of paperwork that has to happen. I remember one individual last year who came up to his Cadre after the 10 minutes to say goodbye and said he wanted to leave, thinking he could leave with his parents at that moment. He ended up staying for a week. Those who DOR or are disenrolled for medical reasons are separted from the program and live in Zulu platoon, where they mostly just hangout until they can leave.

 

[AF6872]

USNA ZULU gets lots of time for calls home or to any one else for advice, with lots of counseling from the staff during the procedure. There are not many family's that have a military background these days although I would be surprised that most Academy and MMA don't have someone in the background. Like I have said before, my DD at the end of I Day said that her hockey coach yelled louder and longer. Once asked a Staff Sargent what he would tell his grandchildren when they asked him What He Did During The War? During Operation Golden Flow.

 

[Hurricane12]

I'm digging back a few years now, but at USNA the detailers (as in, MIDN 1/C) don't really do a whole lot of counseling once a kid says DOR, aside from advising that the plebe stay until at least the Ac year to get a better feel for what the Academy's about.
Most of the DOR stuff goes on at the SEL/Company Officer level and above before they get kicked to Tango Co. They want to make sure that hazing or anything illegal isn't a factor for a kid deciding to leave.

I was a second set squad leader, and literally the first thing I had to do when we got back on deck after turnover was help a plebe who was DORing move her stuff down to Tango (In that case, she'd obviously done everything with the previous set so my "counseling" was limited to "Bummer it didn't work out, good luck out there").
I remember seeing her with the Tango kids at least a week or two later, so it's definitely a process. The kids who go to Tango and change their mind are sent to a different company than their original (again, if I'm remembering correctly).

 

[Blondie1]

I was surprised at how many families did not have a military background. The military family Midshipmen have a much better understanding of what's coming during the summer and are better prepared to suck-it-up and keep moving towards the end goal. The non-military folks had shocked expressions on their faces most of the day.

I was very impressed at how efficiently the ceremony was conducted. Having sat through many change of commands and retirement ceremonies lasting greater than an hour, it was nice to see a 15 minute ceremony that will be remembered better than any of those long winded events.

As a non military family I, politely, disagree. We were not shocked, nor was our plebe. Over the last few years he has met with a number of academy graduates, and spent hours discussing academy life, and service. He had the good fortune of having several teachers that were retired navy and visited with them at great length about his future service. At the end of Iday he was all smiles and excited for the adventure! Can't say what he's feeling now though! One thing is certain he was well aware of what he was getting into, and we were too! Go Navy beat Army!!!!

 

[USNA02]

Agree With Blondie1

We are not a military family. My DS's grandfathers on both sides were in the Navy, but WWII (my dad) and the Korean War (his dad's dad) so that doesn't really count as far as having experienced military life since we weren't born yet.

Neither DS #1 (now known as a MidSib), DS #2 (now a Plebe), nor I were surprised. In all honesty it seemed relatively tame, which has been confirmed by numerous sources that the real "yelling" did not begin until those Mother B doors were firmly shut. Of course, I was simply strolling the Yard, enjoying a picnic under the shade of a tent, and then reading on a blanket under the shade of the trees along Stribling Walk. That could have been why it seemed tame.

We had all done our homework. Not just the DS going in, but all three of us. I had spent about six solid months on this forum, talked to people who had been there/done that, joined FB groups, and made connections with current and former USNA parents prior to I-Day. DS Plebe did the same.

On the other hand, DS Plebe's dad (my DExH?) and stepmother were completely shocked. It started at Gate 1 when someone behind our group stepped out of line to take a picture of security. The barking began aggressively and loud! DSs and I sort of chuckled discretely amongst the three of us, but the other two were taken by surprise. This is the same dad that asked me when this was going to start being like a "normal college" to which I responded, "ummm . . . never?" He is hopefully getting on board quickly!

Bottom line, a generalization of the differences between military and non-military families might be OK, but I really think it boils down to who did their homework and who didn't.

Doesn't mean that even those that think they are prepared are really prepared for Plebe Summer, but perhaps their chances of seeing it through are better.

Now here's hoping that the first communication from DS Plebe is not one begging me to come get him!