I have a Rat at VMI on a Navy scholarship. He loves it there. It's everything he expected and more. They have a unique mentoring program where every rat is assigned a senior mentor ( dyke) As parents, we cut the cord and have let our son handle 99.99% of everything he does in college. We are basically here for support and guidance-if asked. I can say that without a doubt, that his senior mentor has made a huge impact on him already and that he would not be doing as well as he is without that support. This is just one of many reasons why I am such a huge fan of VMI. Yes, we pick up room and board, but it's an expense we gladly pay in order for him to be there. We live in Texas. My son was born and raised here. I have lots of friends that are Texas A&M grads. All wonderful people. Lots of factors to consider. VMI is a VERY small school when compared to A&M. Just depends on what you like. The spartan lifestyle, the rat line, the small classes, small town, etc...are all reasons my son loves it there.
If you have narrowed your school choices down to these two, although very different, I don't think you can make a bad choice.
Good luck and thank you for your willingness to serve this great country.