Whip-sawed Parent

Discussion in 'Service Academy Parents' started by DrJ, Feb 19, 2015.

  1. mswmommy

    mswmommy Member

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    Fantastic thread - I'm very grateful to read it - so many insights and so much shared wisdom.
     
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  2. peppypea

    peppypea Member

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    I know this is pretty much an ancient thread, but I can't thank you enough for this post. Honestly, this is EXACTLY how I feel- with almost the exact same set of circumstances.
     
  3. Hoosiermom18

    Hoosiermom18 Member

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    Me too. Feel free to message me. My son hasn’t gotten an appointment yet. Some days I feel like we’ll both be devastated if he doesnt’ get it, and other days I think I’ll have a panic attack if he does. I want it for him so much because he wants it so much, but we also have a fantastic university fifteen minutes from our house. He’s been accepted. They’ve given him a scholarship. It’s his backup plan. He says he’ll do ROTC for a year and then reapply to WP. I think it’s going to be a stressful spring!
     
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  4. ecmcb5

    ecmcb5 Parent

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    So beautifully written. I have a DD who is waiting to hear from USNA and USCGA. Everyday, I wonder what my reaction will be if she gets an appointment and accepts or if she doesn't get one. The enormity of it hasn't quite sunk it yet. I'll cross that bridge when and if we get there. To say that this process is draining is an understatement, but like you, I am so proud of her for doing everything she had to do to get to this point. All these kids that decide to go down this road have my respect. They are truly special and I know will do great things wherever their journey takes them.
     
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  5. AbsoluteBearing

    AbsoluteBearing Member

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    Ditto here. Well expressed!
     
  6. ecmcb5

    ecmcb5 Parent

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    VelveteenR I am bawling as I finish reading your post. What a gift your son just gave you. Treasure that always! I guess we, parents of these incredible kids, fully understand what sacrifice our children are potentially making. Just yesterday someone said, "Oh, but it's free, right "? I politely reminded them that these kids could pay with their lives. The enormity is overwhelming, but as your son told you, it's what they want to do. My DD once said to me in the car that she would feel guilty if she didn't serve. How do I argue with that? Right now we're still waiting to hear, but when the day comes I know it won't be easy for me wether it's a BFE or a TWE! Selfishly speaking!
     
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  7. kinnem

    kinnem Moderator 5-Year Member

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    No need for it to be stressful with such a great backup plan. Either path leads to a commission, and once you commission no one cares where you went to college. They only care that you produce results.
     
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  8. Goat 965

    Goat 965 Member

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    As the parent of a DD who has just recently received her offer of appointment to USMA, I, too, am wondering what she will decide, and how much I should try to open a conversation about it, to flesh it out. She also has a 4 year AROTC scholarship to Furman University in SC, so she really could go either way. During her agonizing waiver process, she received her ROTC scholarship, and was starting to think that maybe that is where she was meant to be. Then she received her portal present, and now is back thinking that WP was her goal; that's where she belongs........She is going to Furman on an overnight with the ROTC, if only to reaffirm her WP belief. I think that I leave it be, and if she wants my take, I offer it? It's truly her future. How have others handled it?
     
  9. Soldiergriz

    Soldiergriz Husband, Dad, Soldier

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    I am answering questions only when asked. I am honest when I don't have an answer. I am keeping the reality of "cost differentials" out of the conversations. I am leaving the decision entirely up to him, and patting him on the back every day for all he has earned.
     
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  10. Goat 965

    Goat 965 Member

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    Thanks, there is very minimal cost differentials, both options come with their share of expenses, but when you consider what the value of an education at either spot is, it is small potatoes. I have an opinion, as does her Mom (and not necessarily the same), so we will try to not tip our hands, unless asked. Just feel like it is such a huge call to make, a little sounding board action might benefit her.........Hard to complain about the spot she has found herself in, she has done very well.
     
  11. Soldiergriz

    Soldiergriz Husband, Dad, Soldier

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    Yes, much to be proud of...well done.
     
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